Depressed

[Malcolm Tucker]

I am depressed now. I cannot be in denial anymore. I feel like there is a pressure on my chest the whole time. I'm drowning between my paranoia, my school work, among other things.I dont want to do anything. I can barley get up. When I do, I am pissed off. I used to like school. Now I want to run away from everything and never come back. I can't take it anymore. I wonder would anyone miss me. I walked through a crowded corridor today, sleeves up. If anyone gave a crap, and aknowledged me, they would have seen my scar on my arm. Obvious what it's from now. Today in P.E I tried so hard to be good. I wasn't. I never am, at anything. I hate myself. I keep distancing myself from my friends for no reason. I don't know why. I want someone to care. The fake smile will only go so far. I'm not suicidal yet. I'm not sure yet. I have a future. I'm worried that If I keep cutting that I'll piss it all away. That makes my depressed. This makes me cut. And round and round it goes. I can't stop it. I don't even know if I want to stop it. Sorry if it makes no sense =[

[Rutherford The Brave]

Im sorry, but what you shouldn't do is become suicidal! I have been depressed for the past 3 years since my father lost custody when I was 12 I went to see a therapist and have been since then. Also I know it seems hard but you need to stop cutting, because after a while some describe it as being "like nicotine" its almost as if your body needs it. Believe me fake smiles mean nothing in the real world I could put a fake smile on in school and everyone would continue and not notice that I was happy. Please do yourself a favor and talk to someone it doesnt have to be a doctor maybe a friend a loved one or maybe even a teacher.

[iJack]

:hug: dont cut, dont be suicidal, we all love you, and your a mod. if you kill your self, we would loose a great mod and VT member :hug2: :hug3:

[Kaleidoscope Eyes]

Michael, talking to someone could really help you out. You've said you don't feel your worth anyone's time, but you must want help or you wouldn't be here asking for it. Unfortunately, we're all kids like you and we're not trained to help you get better. But we will be here to support you through the process and to cheer you on. Just take the first step, and tell someone what's going on. Tell them what you've told us. Help is out there. :)

[Bryan B]

I was having a Problem like yours but then a Friend said to me that is always people that want you but that you do not know feel it because you hate yourself.
And i was under a lot of pressure with a new school have to go extra classes and french classes sports I never had time for other things so what I do is a tell my parents that i was going out of the French Classes and they accepted.
And in School only try to do your best