Corporal Punishment

[Skyscraper]

I had to write about this for school last week and thought it would be cool to find out some other people's opinions on it: When it comes to parents that hit their kids as a form of punishment, where do you draw the line between discipline and child abuse? Is there a difference between doing it in public versus doing it in private? What other alternatives are there to discipline kids?

[Microcosm]

There's plenty of alternatives. There's grounding them or taking away their computer. There's all sorts of other ways to punish or discipline them. Imo corporal punishment is wrong because you shouldn't make your kid afraid of doing whatever they did wrong because they will get hit for it. You should explain to them why what they did was wrong and maybe ground them. Once they grow up and move out, they'll know you can't hit them anymore so they'll just do whatever they want. They'll also probably hate you for hitting them.

[Stronk Serb]

When I read the title I thought of legal corporal punishment like flogging. Well, if a child refuses to stop something, even after so much, mild corporsl punishment is OK. But corporal punishment needs to be administered like to a dog, the moment the last line fails because the child might not understand why it got punished when done later.

[sunnieseason]

I don't think hitting kids is good in any situation. I can tell you all from personal experience that my mom used to hit me a lot, and then when I moved in with my uncle his parenting style is totally different. He never hit his kids and he never yells at them either. He started doing the same with me, he always found a creative way to solve a conflict without hitting or yelling at me.

It really works beautifully. My cousins are amazing people, and I'm starting to understand that I don't need to be a pain in the ass.

[amgb]

Riiight. I definitely have something to say about this. First off, corporal punishment is wrong and not okay. I used to get hit a lot as well as a kid and let me just say that it didn't really work well for me at all. Here is my example of drawing the line between discipline and child abuse: Hitting a child with a belt once (or a couple of times) is discipline. Hitting a child with a belt repetitively over a long period of time is abuse.
I seriously don't know why a parent would want to hit their kid in public, I mean it's embarrassing for them but I can't imagine how embarrassing it would be for their kid. Physical punishment is wrong no matter if it's done at home or in public. Grounding (although this could work it's quite negative and should only be a last resort), rewarding/incentives, or having in-depth conversations with the kid are some examples of alternatives to physical discipline that I can think of.

[NewZealand]

There's plenty of alternatives. There's grounding them or taking away their computer. There's all sorts of other ways to punish or discipline them. Imo corporal punishment is wrong because you shouldn't make your kid afraid of doing whatever they did wrong because they will get hit for it. You should explain to them why what they did was wrong and maybe ground them. Once they grow up and move out, they'll know you can't hit them anymore so they'll just do whatever they want. They'll also probably hate you for hitting them.
Take away their computer? By the time that children have computers they should be old enough to not have to be disciplined. If some once and right at a young age I think that a simple flick on the ear when done something right is extremely effective. I have a huge respect for my parents, and while living with them I know what they say goes. From a young age the knowledge that doing something wrong has a punishment has changed the way I think, not wrong as in a mistake, but when doing something wrong and knowing that I am doing it. My father has always said stop bullying your brother or il get the wooden spoon, though he had never had to get it out on any of us, not meaning that he was always bliffing( I belive he would have) just because he never had to, we stopped. I have been staying with my cousin, who has three boys who drives her insane and her husband just left. She had never used this method, though after one flick on the ear to one of them who swore at her, all of the boys attitudes have changed. I know that she will never abuse her kids, though she will never have to.

[thatcountrykid]

See my parents would spank me and because of that I now suffer from a severe mental condition called respect for others. It's terrible and I wish my parents never did that to me. It had ruined my life.

[phuckphace]

See my parents would spank me and because of that I now suffer from a severe mental condition called respect for others. It's terrible and I wish my parents never did that to me. It had ruined my life.

I had fun once, it was terrible

[davidsp]

See my parents would spank me and because of that I now suffer from a severe mental condition called respect for others. It's terrible and I wish my parents never did that to me. It had ruined my life.

Haha. :lol: That's great. I think my parents are trying to force me to suffer from the same mental condition. :P

About this thread... Me and my brothers all get spanked for punishment. :whoops: Of course we don't like it. It's punishment and it hurts. But I think it is effective. Could they use alternatives? Sure. Would they work as well or better? Maybe as well but probably not better I think. One other good thing is that even though it is an intense punishment it is pretty quick and then we've learned our lesson, paid out debt, and can get back to life as usual. Butt might be sore for a little while but it's not too terrible.

I think it becomes abuse when a kid gets injured or if the parent is mean or out of control or spanks without good reason. Our parents are always fair. They talk to us an make sure we understand why we are getting it. We usually know why anyway because they are clear about rules. They aren't mean about when they give it to us and I can tell they feel bad about having to do it. But they believe it is good for us and that to work well it needs to hurt. Believe me, it does!! :eek: But it's not the end of the world either.

I love my parents and I'm proud of the way they are raising me and my brothers. :wub:

[Miserabilia]

Don't hit kids, I mean it's 2015. I know people in less developed countries will still do it.. but come on people. We all know by now it doesn't work.

[dirtyboxer55]

positive reinforcement is a much better option.

[TheBigUnit]

See my parents would spank me and because of that I now suffer from a severe mental condition called respect for others. It's terrible and I wish my parents never did that to me. It had ruined my life.

I agree here


Hitting your child for discipline and abuse are two different things though, i remember my mom feeling bad for hitting me afterwards

[Miserabilia]

I agree here


Hitting your child for discipline and abuse are two different things though, i remember my mom feeling bad for hitting me afterwards

lol then why did she do it? Does that somehow justify is or something?
like "oh I purposely hit my children but I don't like it so it's okay"

Obviously I don't know the whole story on your side, but come on slapping children is just ridiculous. It doesn't even matter if they end up learning discipline because of it, because there are much better ways to do that. In any case it's just replacing actual parenting with violence, seems kind of lazy and wrong to me in many ways.

[Hyper]

See my parents would spank me and because of that I now suffer from a severe mental condition called respect for others. It's terrible and I wish my parents never did that to me. It had ruined my life.

I agree here


Hitting your child for discipline and abuse are two different things though, i remember my mom feeling bad for hitting me afterwards

So what part of being physically hurt by someone made you respect ''others'' ?

I don't support it even though I think there are very very rare times when it is ok but even so the more I live and the more I deal with young children the more I'm starting to believe that you can always solve a problem without resorting to physical violence. (At least when it comes to parenting/mentoring, Hyper ain't no flower child)

The discipline instilled by the method is just a fear of pain or rather the consequence of an action.

It does nothing to address why a child shouldn't do something or why something is wrong and so forth. The action or the problem is not adressed in the first place just a statement of power is made - it's like this because I say so.

Sometimes ''because I say so'' is right but most of the time it isn't.

And worst of all most of the time when people resort to corporal punishment they do it because they ''snap'' or in other words they lose control as adults as parents. There is nothing respect worthy in that.

[pconnor2001]

We still get spanked. Its kinda common in my neighborhood