Need Advice

[diaearls]

Hello I'm new here and I need some advice on my relationship.

This is the second time me and my current boyfriend has dated. The first time we dated we were 12 and 14, we met on a chat site. It was also a long distance relationship, I lived in Texas while he was in Oklahoma. We dated for five years on and off because I would cheat on him because I was getting lonely to the fact that my boyfriend was 4 hours away and I wasn't 18 yet and I couldn't see him.

So now 2 and a half years later we've been dating for 8 months now going on 9. We even decided to move in together to put our relationship in hyper drive I guess you can say. My family doesn't care for him too much and I honestly don't like his family either.

But for the past two months I've been feeling like he doesn't trust me. Each time I'll leave the room and come back he has my phone and is going threw my text messages. He's made me unfriend two of my closest friends back home in Texas because they said some things that he feels like threatened our relationship. So now the only people I have in my phone is my family, him and his mom's number. Yes he made me do that.

So I honestly don't know what to do. Can't really talk to anyone, I already know what my mom is going to say and I have no friends to talk to. So can someone help?

[Elysium]

Honestly, that's abusive behavior. Your partner in a relationship should not be acting that way, controlling who you do and don't talk to. I'd get out of the relationship. I'd suck it up and talk to your mother - get through whatever she's going to say, as long as she will help you.

[Melodic]

If your mother is gonna say "break it off", I totally agree. You need to break it off. I was the child of an abusive relationship so I can tell you 100 percent that's where it's heading. You should break it off now so all that boy did was delete your friends.

[diaearls]

Yeah I've been feeling like that for awhile now. I guess since we near saw each other face to face our first relationship I guess I was never able to see his true colors. And I honestly don't like what I'm seeing. He says that I'm a main reason why he has trust issues because of our first relationship and I completely understand, cheating will damage anyone's trust. But I feel as if he's holding it over my head at the same time.

Honestly, that's abusive behavior. Your partner in a relationship should not be acting that way, controlling who you do and don't talk to. I'd get out of the relationship. I'd suck it up and talk to your mother - get through whatever she's going to say, as long as she will help you.
I dont think this was a abusive relationship. But I guess you have a point when you say it. I do want to talk to my mom but I already know what she's going to say and I don't want to hear it.

Posts merged. Next time, please use the "Edit" or "Multi" button. ~Elysium

[Elysium]

I dont think this was a abusive relationship. But I guess you have a point when you say it. I do want to talk to my mom but I already know what she's going to say and I don't want to hear it.
Just because there's no physical abuse going on, doesn't make it any less abusive. Your partner monitoring all your communication and controlling who you do and don't talk to isn't love - that's possessiveness to an extreme, and that's not okay. Your partner is not your parent. And, even if it doesn't look extremely abusive now, those situations tend to escalate over time.

[diaearls]

Hmm that makes sense. I guess I need a refresher ona aabusive relationship.

[DoodleSnap]

That seems like somewhat autocratic and abusive behaviour, however, if you still want to try and salvage the relationship, try to speak to him. Communication is what makes a good relationship, so tell him how you feel. If he is immature about the situation, and doesn't co-operate, then I'd say skedaddle. Ultimately it is your choice, but that is my $0.02.

[diaearls]

That seems like somewhat autocratic and abusive behaviour, however, if you still want to try and salvage the relationship, try to speak to him. Communication is what makes a good relationship, so tell him how you feel. If he is immature about the situation, and doesn't co-operate, then I'd say skedaddle. Ultimately it is your choice, but that is my $0.02.
I do want to work things out. And I do thank you for your $0.02

[DoodleSnap]

I do want to work things out. And I do thank you for your $0.02 No problem. I really hope things are resolved, whatever form resolution may take.