Problems with Intimacy

[EssentialAspiration]

Okay, I have a girlfriend, absolutely lovely girl, she's perfect. She's so much better than me and I can't believe I have her to be honest. But there's a problem, on the outside I've always been a relatively confident person. But really I'm not confident at all. We've been together for 8 months and it took me around 5 months just to kiss her. She's my first girlfriend and we love each other but I feel if I don't get things moving faster she'll get bored of waiting, and I want to for myself as well. But I am nervous about all this sort of stuff. The reason I've always appeared confident is because I do what makes me happy and I don't care what other people think of me. But this girl is like the one person whose opinion I care about so much. I don't know what to do and I don't want to mess things up. Any advice?

Thanks

[Horatio Nelson]

Tell her.

Tell her about how you feel, ask her what she wants, that's how you solve these type of problems. Communication is key. If you never tell each other anything, how will you ever know what the other is thinking, or how they feel?

[EssentialAspiration]

Tell her.

Tell her about how you feel, ask her what she wants, that's how you solve these type of problems. Communication is key. If you never tell each other anything, how will you ever know what the other is thinking, or how they feel?

I could tell her. But I don't want to seem like a lesser person. I don't want her to think less of me. I don't want to come across as weak.

[Horatio Nelson]

I could tell her. But I don't want to seem like a lesser person. I don't want her to think less of me. I don't want to come across as weak.

Why would she think that? If she really truly cares about you and loves you, she won't belittle your feelings or think lesser of you. That's what relationships are all about, committing yourself to that person, helping them with all of their shortcomings and issues, because, we all have them.

[DoodleSnap]

Tell her.

Tell her about how you feel, ask her what she wants, that's how you solve these type of problems. Communication is key. If you never tell each other anything, how will you ever know what the other is thinking, or how they feel?
^^^THIS.
Communication is key in any relationship. Speak to her about how you feel, and find out what she wants, and how you can make each other happy. Being the lovely person you say she is, she will understand and welcome the communication.

[JamesSuperBoy]

Okay, I have a girlfriend, absolutely lovely girl, she's perfect. She's so much better than me and I can't believe I have her to be honest. But there's a problem, on the outside I've always been a relatively confident person. But really I'm not confident at all. We've been together for 8 months and it took me around 5 months just to kiss her. She's my first girlfriend and we love each other but I feel if I don't get things moving faster she'll get bored of waiting, and I want to for myself as well. But I am nervous about all this sort of stuff. The reason I've always appeared confident is because I do what makes me happy and I don't care what other people think of me. But this girl is like the one person whose opinion I care about so much. I don't know what to do and I don't want to mess things up. Any advice?

Thanks

If you care about her opinion then ask her - as others say communication is the thing. Also you have to know how she feels about intimacy as well.

[Failed Algebra]

I'm a little bit the same way, and lose my confidence around girls. But i agree with what everybody else said...most girls LIKE when guys share their emotions and are more vulnerable. so i bet when you talk to her about this, it will make everything much better

[EssentialAspiration]

We've wound up speaking about it and she was quite upset. She wants things to get more serious. She asked if we could get more serious. I said yes, I'm not too sure why I said yes, but I did. I want things to get more serious I'm just scared as fuck. I don't know what I'm scared of I just am

[Turin15]

I think you should tell Her that you want more intimacy. You have nothing to be afraid of. It is natural and important to have intimacy with a partner, you become closer.

[CRH99]

i was in the same boat, and we broke up for technicalities quite a bit later, 11 months actually, but after that i discovered that she was kinda the one who had no interest in the more intimate areas... she was pretty conservative tho, so if shes more of a free spirit go for it, but if shes more not in that area its your call