Confusing situation with 2 girls

[Jokuvaa]

So I have no idea how I ended up in this situation. TL;DR below, but I appreciate if you read it through.

I'm really into this girl from school who is on one grade lower than me. We have talked in whatsapp a few times (one time we talked for 4 hours). I have also gone out to town with my friends and her and her friends every friday now since new year. One time we both had had some drinks and we were pretty close that night (nothing happened though). After that she has only been as a friend around me. She makes me feel... I don't know, I just have a huge crush on her but she might not be into me (she talks to other boys aswell). She is just perfect but I don't think I have a chance on her.

Then there is this second girl, a year older than me. She had a crush on me one year ago but I kept hinting her I want us to be just friends. Now she is in a really serious relationship with someone. They had some issues (the girl opened up to me then) but they are back to normal now, I think. The thing is the girl seems to be into me again, even though she is in a relationship. I have now realised I have some sort of mixed up feelings about her :/. I don't want to be that guy who breaks up their relationship :(.

TL;DR: So. First girl I have a crush on but I don't think I have a chance on her. Second one is unavailable but flirting with me. I have some feelings about her, but I don't want her to break up because of me.

So yeah umm... How to proceed, what to do?

[Melodic]

Don't proceed with either of these at all. Until you know for sure that one of these girls are into you and are not into anyone else, then go with it and see what happens.

[CanadianJake]

Don't proceed with either of these at all. Until you know for sure that one of these girls are into you and are not into anyone else, then go with it and see what happens.

I agree with what Comet said, you don't want to proceed with both of them then you could lead both of them on. I'm not saying you'd lead them on but one is currently in a relationship with someone, in some ways if she's in a relationship and is liking/falling for you. She should end the relationship because technically it isn't right that she's using the other guy yet she's liking you. I'm not sure if that's exactly what she's doing but still, she's in a relationship and if she doesn't want to see the guy hurt then she would end it because she does like/love you. As for the other one has she shown any signs that she is even interested in you? has she said anything or left hints that she is somewhat interested or just wants to be friends? Either way don't proceed unless you know who you like because you may end up liking someone else as well. Either way take some time and think for yourself, think if one of these girls is even into you while another one is not. Hope this helps!

[Jokuvaa]

Yeah thanks for the replies. I'll just wait and see if the situation solves itself :/. And when Girl2 flirts with me I'll try to ignore her, which is not that easy. Apparently she saw a dream of me last night... And yeah Girl1 has shown signs of interest. For example she keeps secretly looking at me in school and always says hi when she passes by in corridors. And I think her friends have teased her a bit when I'm around, not sure though.

[Jokuvaa]

So the situation is starting to get clear (didn't expect it to be this fast).

Yesterday I got a reminder why I wanted 1 year ago just be friends with Girl2 and nothing more. She can really be ''attention seeker'' kind of girl and get easily jealous: she got mad at me over nothing. I don't want that in a relationship. I haven't talked to her since she got mad and I won't ''fix'' things between us, she can decide for herself what she wants.

On the other hand Girl1 seems to start conversations with me about almost anything and I really enjoy talking to her. Whenever I get a message, I always hope it's Girl1. When it turns out to be a friend or Girl2, I get a bit disappointed. Maybe that shows how I really feel. I remember now how I dreaded getting messages from Girl2 year ago and even ignored them, but that won't happen with Girl1.

Now I just need to figure out when and how to tell Girl1 about my feelings. I don't want to pass on her, I know I'd regret it if I didn't even try.

[JamesSuperBoy]

Good you realise that - take a while to think things over and wait. Not easy but at least you will not rush into something.

[Jokuvaa]

Alright so a lot has happened.

Last week I talked to Girl2 and she spoke of her engagement with her boyfriend and that they will get married one day. She also told me she has a bad habit of getting a crush while in a relationship, and she told me that her current crush is already fading. Didn't say it was me though. She did for the first time admit she had a crush on me 1 year ago. So now we are just friends and I told her about Girl1 and she told me to go for it.

Tonight I talked to Girl1 and she said she has a crush. When I asked who he is she just told it's someone I know. She wouldn't say it there but she said she can tell me face to face. So now I feel crushed on the inside, but there's a spark of hope. Maybe she was talking about me and that's why she is only going to tell it to me face to face.

Anyway, tomorrow I will talk to her in school and go all in by revealing my feelings. Then all I need to do is wait and see if anything happens between us. I will be back tomorrow to tell you guys how it went.

[CreativeUsername]

Hope it all works well for you. It sounds to me as though she was flirting with you. The way that one of my friends asked his crush to go to a dance with him was by telling her that she had a crush. Then he took her aside and said something like, "you know that person I told you i was going to ask to the dance?" and then he described all her qualities, and ended by asking her.

[Nico11]

Proceed slowly on whatever you decide. Everything needs to be thought out, or you just might ruin your chance at a potential soulmate.

[Jokuvaa]

Hey all thanks for the replies :). I couldn't tell Girl1 yesterday or I didn't really have a chance. Then today I messaged her that I had to talk to her in private and she was freaking out like has something happened to my mom or something.

So then we talked. Or I tried to talk but no words came. Then I managed to say it was her I have a crush on (there was some talk about who my crush is yesterday). I told her how I feel about her but we agreed to stay as friends, as she has had some very bad relationships and she doesn't really want to ruin things between the two of us. She was being very very very apologetic about the situation, but I said I'm fine with staying friends and I'll just have to move on. She said she had no idea I have a crush on her but her friends had said to her it was obvious :D or something like that.

So yeah, all is clear now, no more confusing situation. I actually became closer friends with Girl2 than before because there had always been some sort of tension between us. And with Girl1 I'm apparently one of her best friends and I'm happy about that. I mean I'm sad we won't be more than friends with Girl1, but it's better than nothing. We did chat in whatsapp after my reveal and there's no awkwardness. Things between us are still the same, only difference is that she knows how I feel.

[Jokuvaa]

Sorry to bring this back on surface, but Girl2....
There was a party last friday, and I hang out with Girl2 there a lot. We both drank quite a bit and we both opened up to each other...

She told me she has a crush/is in love with me. That the feeling never left her from 1 year ago. She said it's not sexual crush or anything, it just feels right to her to be with me. But like she said the two of us are so different and it probably would end badly. We agreed to stay as friends as neither of us want any more complications in our lives. She hasn't told anyone about her crush to me and if her boyfriend found out it would be the end for them. They are engaged, but they have couple of times nearly broke up.

So again, in the party, after she told me she loves me, we were really close to each other. We even slept in the same bed and she kept leaning at me and overall the whole night we were together. Nothing actually happened though.

Now I really wish there won't be any rumours tomorrow in school about us in the party. There were a few people looking at us weirdly as everyone knows Girl2 is engaged to her boyfriend.

I also feel cruel now :(. We agreed to stay as friends, but still I let her lean to me and all that. I hope I didn't give any false signs to her.

When did life become this hard...