Why do I care about this?

[onewingedangel666]

The girl I like is dating someone. He's not a virgin, hasn't been since 7th grade, and I'm.... scared(I guess thats the right word) that they've had sex. I know I can't stop it if they do, but it just eats at me. I never really think of her in that way, but that doesn't mean he doesn't.
I'm not sure whether I'm asking if you think they have or why you think I care/ am so scared of it happening, but I need someone to talk to about it.

[SethfromMI]

well what exactly do you need to talk to someone about? are you venting? do you see her as a little sister/sister and feel the need to protect her? does it bother you because you actually are interested in her and want to be her first?

[onewingedangel666]

It sounds really assish (That a word haha?) to say it, but I guess I do/did want to be first. I mean she never had a boyfriend before this guy...

[Magenta]

Honestly? It's none of your business whether or not they have sex unless she wants to talk to you about it. So I wouldn't worry about it. If you're feeling a bit jealous, well, it happens but there's nothing you can do about it.

[David_L2]

Whether your her first or not, if you two hook up eventually, it really won't matter

[Luminous]

Just because it's her first relationship doesn't even mean it's her first time having sex. You don't really know anything about that part of her life and it's unfair to both of you that you're taking responsibility of it. Let her do what she wants, and don't chase after her while she's in a relationship, it's a bad idea. If it really means that much to her, then you have to tell her honestly how you feel and what you want, but don't push her into anything.

[maniamsmart]

It is very natural to be scared about it. You like the girl, and you obviously don't want someone else getting her from you. It also seems like you value sex in a love type of way, and perhaps you're just jealous? Do you feel jealous or anyway wishing that she didn't have sex?

[onewingedangel666]

Thanks to everyone who replied. I know its none of my business haha, and I know I shouldn't care. anyway though, I would have to sya I don't want her to have sex with him, but as people have said I have no control over (Nor do i want to control it)

Anyway, I'm having a hard time talking about this/her right now, and old message that was never supposed to be sent to her got sent, and I'm still reeling.

[maniamsmart]

Thanks to everyone who replied. I know its none of my business haha, and I know I shouldn't care. anyway though, I would have to sya I don't want her to have sex with him, but as people have said I have no control over (Nor do i want to control it)

Anyway, I'm having a hard time talking about this/her right now, and old message that was never supposed to be sent to her got sent, and I'm still reeling.

Perhaps its best not to talk to her about it?

[ImCoolBeans]

Jealousy is a normal reaction to a situation like that, just try not to be that jealous guy who obsesses over it, and takes it to heart so much that it winds up hurting you. If they do have sex, or continue dating, there isn't much you can really do about it. Sorry things worked out this way, but that doesn't mean that your shot is lost forever. My advice is to move on and keep doing your thing, if you find somebody else that's great, but maybe down the line you'll have your shot with her. You never know how things will work out -- but I wouldn't go all in on that -- you might end up setting yourself up for disappointment.

[maniamsmart]

Jealousy is a normal reaction to a situation like that, just try not to be that jealous guy who obsesses over it, and takes it to heart so much that it winds up hurting you. If they do have sex, or continue dating, there isn't much you can really do about it. Sorry things worked out this way, but that doesn't mean that your shot is lost forever. My advice is to move on and keep doing your thing, if you find somebody else that's great, but maybe down the line you'll have your shot with her. You never know how things will work out -- but I wouldn't go all in on that -- you might end up setting yourself up for disappointment.

Yup, agree with this, don't set yourself for disappointment, don't force anything either. Let things flow, and if they come to you, then take the chance.