I am so confused :(

[Iamsolost]

So the girl I like and I have been messaging recently and we have a lot of the same interests! She does the standard stuff that shows a girl likes you, reference here if you want to see my post on the details http://www.virtualteen.org/forums/showthread.php?p=2969171. But recently over message I told her I really liked her and if she didn't feel the same it was ok. But no response. After two days at school she saw me and never said anything. As I was exiting the class we share she was whispering to her friend and looking at me as they walked out(that is what it looked like)? Then today on the bus she starts talking to me, asked me a question because the other kids were talking about if this girl was pretty or not. That was really hurtful. She ignored my message then just started to talk to me on the bus. I answered her with a "No" because a classmate was laughing saying "say no" I said no and turned around. I am so friggin lost. Why would someone ignore that and then talk to someone? Advice on what to do? I am SOOO lost. What do I do? Message her something asking questions?

UPDATE: A little bit after I got home she asked "Are you mad at me?" I said "No (Blushing smily face), just a little confused" and second message "Are you mad at me?" back to her.

There must be a missing manual somewhere I didn't read.

[CanadianJake]

Personally I think she's just ignoring it because she doesn't want to hurt you, I mean she said she doesn't feel the same so in all fairness she probably thinks your gonna move on and find someone else which isn't the case. I'd say you should try talking to her face to face, make sure your alone but I think you should try talking to her about this. I think she doesn't want to hurt you but she doesn't want to make things awkward either, she might be friend zoning you which is really hard but yet it seems like when a guy likes someone that they are really close too the girl doesn't see you the same way. They see you as a friend or even a brother type friendship, they respect that you are there for them but they don't want to lose the friendship they have and she doesn't see you as anything else. Sadly there's no manual for this kind of thing, love is a mysterious thing. No one can create an instruction manual because we all experience different scenarios. Either way I think you should just talk to her and see what happens, take things slowly though. Regardless I think you should try talking to some other girls, see what happens. For all you know it could make her jealous and then she may want you? I'm not saying to make her jealous but maybe it's for the best, she doesn't want you to be upset or hurt by her not feeling the same way. I'm sorry if this isn't much help but I think maybe talk to some other girls, get to know them better and for all you know you could meet someone who is much better then her. Like I said there isn't much help here but I hope it helps.

[Iamsolost]

She never said she doesn't feel the same :)

[CanadianJake]

Well in that case maybe she does feel the same way about you but she's probably nervous about going into a relationship then getting hurt. I'd say at least try talking to her and see where things go, you both need to talk in person face to face. Not by message but actual talking, she will see that your willing to show commitment by talking to her about it. Even then I'd try asking her out on a date if you haven't already done that, ask her out on a date or just want to hang out one night as friends but then try talking to her about it that way.

[Iamsolost]

CanadianJake, do you think I should ask her to hang out?

[CanadianJake]

Yeah, truthfully before even just asking her out just ask her to hang out instead. See where things go and if you feel like maybe she does like you then maybe try to talk to her about it, tell her you still like her and want to take her out on a date sometime. But hang out first as friends to see where things lead.

[Iamsolost]

I just asked and she said "I can try. why what did you have in mind?" Not sure how to respond to that one? Is this like her giving me a chance to get to know each other? Or what exactly is going on? You probably see how clueless I am as to what is happening atm.

[CanadianJake]

Her ignoring you I can't really comment on because personally I've never been in that sort of situation, she probably didn't want to make things awkward on message and she was probably stunned when you told her you liked her. However her talking to you on the bus is bit strange, considering the fact she's ignoring your text messages. I think maybe you do need to discuss that about her ignoring your text messages. Maybe she's busy from time to time and can't really send messages which is understandable but she could just take some time to message you later on and apologize for it. However her asking if you were mad at her is another weird thing, why would she think you'd be mad at her? I mean yeah your upset with her ignoring the messages but the fact she can talk to you on the bus, it does say something is weird. I don't know what to say about that though but personally I do think you need to talk to her about that.

[Iamsolost]

.... Deleted> too much personal info>>>

[CanadianJake]

Sorry for replying late but have you thought about going to see a movie? take her ice skating, mini putt golfing or something in a long those lines, as far as talking to her I'd say maybe in a public setting not too public but why not go for a walk along the park and sit down for awhile to talk. That'd be a good idea, you could also take her to a coffee shop or something to get something to eat and talk that way as well.

[sunnieseason]

It's been my experience that girls just ignore rather than confront. We are raised to be indirect and its easier to avoid difficult things than to take them on. Her ignoring you is her way of saying she doesn't like you in that way. :(

[SethfromMI]

Sorry for replying late but have you thought about going to see a movie? take her ice skating, mini putt golfing or something in a long those lines, as far as talking to her I'd say maybe in a public setting not too public but why not go for a walk along the park and sit down for awhile to talk. That'd be a good idea, you could also take her to a coffee shop or something to get something to eat and talk that way as well.

a movie is not a good first one. go somewhere where the two of you can talk

[CanadianJake]

He wanted a place to hangout that's why I suggested the movies but as far as talking he needs to do it somewhere else not at the movies. I never suggested the movies to be the place to talk lol

[maniamsmart]

It's been my experience that girls just ignore rather than confront. We are raised to be indirect and its easier to avoid difficult things than to take them on. Her ignoring you is her way of saying she doesn't like you in that way. :(

This could very well be it. Coming from a girl herself, I'd agree with it.

[sunnieseason]

This could very well be it. Coming from a girl herself, I'd agree with it.

Lol, thanks. I'm sympathetic to boys because I have an awesome male role model in my life. I also hate being friends with other girls who just destroy boys. It's disgusting.

[maniamsmart]

Lol, thanks. I'm sympathetic to boys because I have an awesome male role model in my life. I also hate being friends with other girls who just destroy boys. It's disgusting.

So do you mostly hate girls? That's how my girlfriend is, she mostly doesn't like girls because of that.

[sunnieseason]

So do you mostly hate girls? That's how my girlfriend is, she mostly doesn't like girls because of that.

I don't hate girls, I just find it difficult to be friends with them. I'm 13 and this is like the most awkward age to be a girl. The popular girls start caring about boys and materialistic things, none of which I'm interested in. I mean I like boys, but I'm not interested in fighting for their attention.

I'm trying to say that girls are petty and mean to each other.

I like smart and nerdy things which boys are usually more interested in talking about, so I tend to hang out with more boys. I'm also very close with my uncle and he's been talking to me about how women his age do morally reprehensible things and get away with it because culture makes them out to be victims all the time.

My two older girl cousins have become my best friends. They are so different than the girls in school and I think its because my uncle raised them as a single dad. So I guess the point of all my rambling is that I like the male influence I have in my life and I reject the mean spirited femininity.

So do you mostly hate girls? That's how my girlfriend is, she mostly doesn't like girls because of that.

Your girlfriend sounds awesome!

Please don't double post ~ Mike/ImCoolBeans

[maniamsmart]

I don't hate girls, I just find it difficult to be friends with them. I'm 13 and this is like the most awkward age to be a girl. The popular girls start caring about boys and materialistic things, none of which I'm interested in. I mean I like boys, but I'm not interested in fighting for their attention.

I'm trying to say that girls are petty and mean to each other.

I like smart and nerdy things which boys are usually more interested in talking about, so I tend to hang out with more boys. I'm also very close with my uncle and he's been talking to me about how women his age do morally reprehensible things and get away with it because culture makes them out to be victims all the time.

My two older girl cousins have become my best friends. They are so different than the girls in school and I think its because my uncle raised them as a single dad. So I guess the point of all my rambling is that I like the male influence I have in my life and I reject the mean spirited femininity.



Your girlfriend sounds awesome!

Please don't double post ~ Mike/ImCoolBeans

I see, and yes, I understand, and she feels the same way, she can't be friends with girls as easily as she can with boys. But I think that's enough of that, I don't want to turn this into our own thread and stray from the topic xD