Unsure of what she wants and how i find out.

[alma2]

So i met this girl about two weeks ago. I approached her and chatted with her for a short while and got her number. So the next couple of days we texted eachother. Nothing too flirtatious just normal texting. The only thing which i noticed which was odd, was that it was me that initiated the conversations every time. Now from past experiences that means she is not interested, but she answered straight away and it was never a one way conversation. The one time she wrote to me first was on 31 december. She asked if i was going to the local town to celebrate, which i was. I talked with her briefly before i went to one club and she went to another.

Then the clock hit 6 in the morning and she texted me where i was. I ended up going to the club she was at and we sat and talked. She then made the first move and put her hand on my thigh. We then held hands and she moved closer to me. Her friend said if " i was the guy, she is trying to get". She smiled and moved closer again. As the club began to shut down for the night, she asked if i would come to her house. I truly did not expect that... Ofcourse i said yes as she was/is cute and so far we had hit it off. We got to her house and we ended up making out. For some reason i did not make the move... Maybe i was unsure if she wanted to have sex. ( quite stupid thought since she invited me to her parents house to sleep...)

I left early next day, as i had to go to work. Since then it has returned to the same patern, as before. I start texting she answers..

Now to where i need advice. There is several things indicating that she does not want to be in a serious relationship. I myself am open to both trying and dating her and see where it goes or just having a not so serious relationship. I just feel like i need to clarify what she wants, because then i will know what i have to deal with. Instead of playing this guessing game.

So how do i go about finding out. Right know i am leaning towards putting the cards on the table and just asking her straight out what she wants. I am also considering just asking her on a date, but that might throw her off and make her afraid of me "liking" her to much.

[Thunderstorm]

I mean, personally, I do not see the harm in asking to go on a simple date. It can be to a restaurant, movies, whatever. It seems since she invited you over after a long night, she really liked you. However, if she seems very fragile, you may want to ask too much of her right away (such as a first date). Does she really want a relationship? Did she get out of a relationship recently? Are you her first? These are things I would want to know if I was you. Thereby, you will know what kind of experiences she has had with boys in the past and what she wants right now. It's probably best to just ask her if she wants to just be friends or more than friends. Then go ahead with the date idea. Good luck.

[churris]

What Thunderstorm said seems right. You could always invite her to hang out somewhere, maybe not a date officially and clarify what she wants in person, so you don't have to ask by texts. Tell her you're open to a relationship or taking things slow or being a mostly physical thing if that's what you're okay with, so you can talk and see where you both are with each other.

[alma2]

Thanks for the advice! Its late here in Denmark, so i will wait to tomorrow. I am going to ask if she wants to hang out some day (where i will ask her what she wants), and then i will take it from there. If she says no then it is what it is.. I will let you guys know what she says tomorrow.

[alma2]

Okay, so i asked her what she saw me/us as and she texted "uhmm... right now i see you as being only a friend ;)"

Dont really know what to make of that. I will just take it slow and see what happens.

[maniamsmart]

She seems pretty interested, you should just ask her out, or ask her how she feels about dating. You need to make the move here, she seems to already be hinting she wants you, maybe she is just waiting for you to ask.

[Leprous]

So i met this girl about two weeks ago. I approached her and chatted with her for a short while and got her number. So the next couple of days we texted eachother. Nothing too flirtatious just normal texting. The only thing which i noticed which was odd, was that it was me that initiated the conversations every time. Now from past experiences that means she is not interested, but she answered straight away and it was never a one way conversation. The one time she wrote to me first was on 31 december. She asked if i was going to the local town to celebrate, which i was. I talked with her briefly before i went to one club and she went to another.

Then the clock hit 6 in the morning and she texted me where i was. I ended up going to the club she was at and we sat and talked. She then made the first move and put her hand on my thigh. We then held hands and she moved closer to me. Her friend said if " i was the guy, she is trying to get". She smiled and moved closer again. As the club began to shut down for the night, she asked if i would come to her house. I truly did not expect that... Ofcourse i said yes as she was/is cute and so far we had hit it off. We got to her house and we ended up making out. For some reason i did not make the move... Maybe i was unsure if she wanted to have sex. ( quite stupid thought since she invited me to her parents house to sleep...)

I left early next day, as i had to go to work. Since then it has returned to the same patern, as before. I start texting she answers..

Now to where i need advice. There is several things indicating that she does not want to be in a serious relationship. I myself am open to both trying and dating her and see where it goes or just having a not so serious relationship. I just feel like i need to clarify what she wants, because then i will know what i have to deal with. Instead of playing this guessing game.

So how do i go about finding out. Right know i am leaning towards putting the cards on the table and just asking her straight out what she wants. I am also considering just asking her on a date, but that might throw her off and make her afraid of me "liking" her to much.

May I just ask you how old you are?

[alma2]

May I just ask you how old you are? I am 19 years old and she is 18.

[DDAx]

Woah.
Seems rather complicated. See, she's subtly hinting that she wants to start a relationship, however.. Due to that experience on nye, it may not be the relationship you're looking for..
What you do now is the hard part since you're on that thin line between partner and friendzone it looks like.
This means you'll need to make sure you won't scare her..
Just take it easy with her.. Show her you have some other friends. That you're you and you don't exactly need to talk to her all the time.
If she really does like you, she'll make the move. Like on nye. But make sure you don't lose contact. It's hard to do. But it's just some advice.
Maybe try something small like while you're talking be like, I'm meeting some friends now, see you soon? And it'll create some mystery and make her want you...

I should be a novelist;)

Okay, anyway, that's me done, good luck friend!

[SethfromMI]

did you ask her out yet? that may seem like the easiest thing to do at this point

[alma2]

Yeah i agree. I will do it.

[maniamsmart]

Yeah i agree. I will do it.

Great, let us know how it goes :)