How does a relationship happen?

[deepshark]

Hi everyone, it's my first post here :) and I have never been in any kind of relationship. I suppose one of the main reasons I haven't had a partner or sought out a relationship with someone is because I don't know what happens after that or how it even starts...?

Here's a scenario:

I'm attracted to somebody to the point where I want to ask them out.
First problem.
Ask them out how? Is there some kind of rule book for this? Everybody else my age seems to know exactly how this happens and yadayada boom clap done... I will continue.

So they say yes (Yay!). Now what? Are we a couple now? Are we actually going to follow through with this 'date'? What has changed? Do we treat eachother differently now somehow? Especially if we weren't friends before all this, do we instantly become friends and hang out? It seems strange that two disconnected people can become a couple in just a couple of days...

So let's just say we hang out and we're really getting along and still dating or whatever. At this point are we holding hands? Kissing? Having sex? What?

That pretty much sums up my scenario.

tl;dr version: I would like to know what changes happen between two people before and after they 'go out' It just doesn't make sense to me how it all progresses. I understand its not the same for everyone and its all about feeling comfortable and going at your own pace and all that but it seems so awkward and even though I know what I want from a relationship I have no idea how it happens...

Thanks :)

Alex

[Horatio Nelson]

I don't see it as so cut and dry.

In my case, I saw her, she was beautiful, I started talking to her, got her number, became closer, asked her to go out, told her I loved her, and now we are "dating". That's pretty much how it works I think.

It's something you both just realize after getting to know each other.

I hope that helps. :)

[kay_jay]

You just continue getting to know each other and spend time with each other and the kissing and sex just happens when you're both ready.

[Hudor]

There's no rulebook for relationships. It isn't as easy as flipping through the pages of a manual to find the topics you desire. Although it isn't difficult too.
Idk how to describe falling in love. I can't really think of an exact definition. I feel you will understand it best when you fall in love yourself.
1.How to ask out the person you like? Various ways which depend upon the situation but the basics are to let them know that you like their company ( subtly or not is upto you and again depends on different aspects)
2. They say yes: No you don't become a couple just because of that. Two individuals become a couple when two individuals can conceptualise spending their lives together happily and are by each others' side through thick and thin. That's essentially how i see it though that's not the entirety of the situation. Whether you follow by a date or not is for you to decide, depending on whether you liked the other person's company. I don't think anything changes majorly in one meeting though that's entirely possible too but usually people take time to realize they love the other person. However after the moment you realize you love the other person, you start treating them differently.
3. Hanging out: Like everything else it is up to you and your partner to decide what you would like to do.

[Saint of Sinners]

Don't think there's really any fixed rules. Can be as simple as telling your good friend that you like her. Can take years of effort looking for opportunities. It varies.

[maniamsmart]

I could write 10 paragraphs explaining to you what happens, how it happens, and progression paths, but honestly, it depends on the couple. The real question here is not how a relationship starts or how it progresses. The real question is "Do you want a relationship?", "If you want one, why do you want it?", and "What do you expect from a relationship?". Depending on your answers here will depend on how your relationship progresses.

In general though, relationships are started to share your life with someone you dearly love and become closer with them than with a friend. A person to help you in your life, and help the other person grow as well. You help each other, learn from each other, and teach each other. One may say, well that's what I already do in a friendship, so what's the difference? That answer isn't so clear now, it's very abstract, and this is also why some people stay single, because they don't see a point or benefit from a relationship. Hence, which is why I ask you these questions as I stated above.