I don't know what to do

[Pop girl]

So we're 14 and only been dating for a little bit but I am absolutely in love:wub:. The problem is every time I want to hang out he is "busy" and i was really starting to think he didn't like me very much so I asked him and told him how I felt and he said he loves me so much and everything but even though he always says he loves me and sends me love hearts all the time he doesn't show it very much :( he always seems to be more interested with his friends than me. When he stayed at my house one night I was cuddling him and he seemed to keep moving away... I told him if he doesn't like me to just dump me but he "loves" me. I love him more than anyone but I'm constantly going from feeling so happy becuase I love him so much to doubting our realationship because I think he doesn't like me. I feel desperate every time I talk to him. Any advice ? Xx

[Buddy 912]

He may not be as "in love" as you are. Guys are not as ready as girls to be in a commented relationship. Take your time/ When he is ready, you will know it.

[Leprous]

So we're 14 and only been dating for a little bit but I am absolutely in love:wub:. The problem is every time I want to hang out he is "busy" and i was really starting to think he didn't like me very much so I asked him and told him how I felt and he said he loves me so much and everything but even though he always says he loves me and sends me love hearts all the time he doesn't show it very much :( he always seems to be more interested with his friends than me. When he stayed at my house one night I was cuddling him and he seemed to keep moving away... I told him if he doesn't like me to just dump me but he "loves" me. I love him more than anyone but I'm constantly going from feeling so happy becuase I love him so much to doubting our realationship because I think he doesn't like me. I feel desperate every time I talk to him. Any advice ? Xx

Maybe you could talk to him about this. This doesn't mean he doesn't love you, but maybe he's not used to a relationship. There could be many reasons why he's acting like this, just talk to him about it.

[Zachary G]

its not that he doenst like you, i believe he may have true feelings for you, but he may not be as comfortable with the physical aspects of the relationship -- like cuddling, holding hands, etc -- some boys just arent in with the touchy-feely stuff that comes with a relationship, so you might want to talk with him about that just to see where he is on that point, then go from there.

[omgwuut]

I think his love for you isn't enough yet. wait until he's ready to commit with you. anyway, tell him what you really feel. communication is a must in a relationship.

[Semi_IronMan]

Have u asked him what's happening?

[maniamsmart]

So we're 14 and only been dating for a little bit but I am absolutely in love:wub:. The problem is every time I want to hang out he is "busy" and i was really starting to think he didn't like me very much so I asked him and told him how I felt and he said he loves me so much and everything but even though he always says he loves me and sends me love hearts all the time he doesn't show it very much :( he always seems to be more interested with his friends than me. When he stayed at my house one night I was cuddling him and he seemed to keep moving away... I told him if he doesn't like me to just dump me but he "loves" me. I love him more than anyone but I'm constantly going from feeling so happy becuase I love him so much to doubting our realationship because I think he doesn't like me. I feel desperate every time I talk to him. Any advice ? Xx

He may not be ready for a relationship yet. If he is more interested in hanging out with his friends, it is pretty clear he isn't ready yet. I also think that you showing you love him so much, and pouring your feelings out, and having all these expectations is kind of making it hard for him and may be stressing him out a bit.

You both are pretty young, and you may have a good idea about what a relationship is (since girls tend to be more mature), but he probably doesn't. Was this his first relationship? Most boys at this age don't really understand love or the value of a relationship because they are just simply inexperienced, you may just be expecting too much from him.

I was advising one of my friend's relationships where the boy also didn't spend much time with the girl, and he always said he loved her so much, but barely showed it. His problem was that he didn't know how to show it, and wasn't ready for a serious relationship, but the girl was. You may be in the same situation right now, and if that's the case then you have two options. Either one, deal with the fact that he is inexperienced and just kindly tell him what you like to do with him, and ask him if he likes to the same too. You can also suggest what you like about him that makes you happy, or when he does get physical with you (affectionate-wise) tell him that you like it and makes you happy. Just try to drop him hints and help him by telling him what you'd like to have in your relationship with him. And the second option would be to go on a break with your relationship with him and wait till he matures in a year or two.

I've seen both options work out very well. Considering that you are so in love with this boy, I think you should take option one. But when you are doing this, don't be sad or disappointed, because I am sure he does love you, he just doesn't know how to show it and just doesn't seem to know that much about love as you may seem to know.

If it's one thing I highly encourage you to always remember is, it's that relationships are not meant to be perfect. Relationships are meant to have errors, and things in them that you don't like, but the key is to help each other fix these errors and make each other better people. Relationships are learning experiences, and when you find the right relationship you will see that love is all about care, honesty, loyalty, passion, and helping the person you love become better.

I hope this helped and gave you another perspective to look from. If you have any other question feel free to ask.

[Semi_IronMan]

So we're 14 and only been dating for a little bit but I am absolutely in love:wub:. The problem is every time I want to hang out he is "busy" and i was really starting to think he didn't like me very much so I asked him and told him how I felt and he said he loves me so much and everything but even though he always says he loves me and sends me love hearts all the time he doesn't show it very much :( he always seems to be more interested with his friends than me. When he stayed at my house one night I was cuddling him and he seemed to keep moving away... I told him if he doesn't like me to just dump me but he "loves" me. I love him more than anyone but I'm constantly going from feeling so happy becuase I love him so much to doubting our realationship because I think he doesn't like me. I feel desperate every time I talk to him. Any advice ? Xx

maybe the spark's just not there anymore, maybe u should reach out to him and ask him what's happening or if he needs some space to figure everything out.
Another theory is maybe he's not ready for a relationship since he's keen on hanging out with he's mates rather than u

[maniamsmart]

maybe the spark's just not there anymore, maybe u should reach out to him and ask him what's happening or if he needs some space to figure everything out

But he clearly does love the girl, because he always tells her, now unless he is lying, I think he may just not know fully how to express love, or what love is, which I elaborated on in my post above.

Then again, maybe he is lying, and asking this question will give him an opportunity to say "yes, I need some space". But then again, if he isn't lying you'll just get a "no I love you" sort of response which is what we already know.

[Semi_IronMan]

But he clearly does love the girl, because he always tells her, now unless he is lying, I think he may just not know fully how to express love, or what love is, which I elaborated on in my post above.

Then again, maybe he is lying, and asking this question will give him an opportunity to say "yes, I need some space". But then again, if he isn't lying you'll just get a "no I love you" sort of response which is what we already know.

I get what you're saying but I still think asking him is the best chance to know his true feelings. I mean it's better to find out now if he's lying rather than later when the girl's feelings for him have deepened 'cause that'll just be aweful and heartbreaking

[maniamsmart]

I get what you're saying but I still think asking him is the best chance to know his true feelings. I mean it's better to find out now if he's lying rather than later when the girl's feelings for him have deepened 'cause that'll just be aweful and heartbreaking

Right another very viable option if unsure.

[SethfromMI]

its not that he doenst like you, i believe he may have true feelings for you, but he may not be as comfortable with the physical aspects of the relationship -- like cuddling, holding hands, etc -- some boys just arent in with the touchy-feely stuff that comes with a relationship, so you might want to talk with him about that just to see where he is on that point, then go from there.

this. some guys are real funny when it comes to this stuff. some do not always know how to hare their feelings. I guess it is possible he is not interested in you, but I think it is more you are one of his first relationships and he may not know how he should act

[Contagious]

Almost the same thing happened with me and my ex-bf, except I was the one who would tell him I was busy all the time and hang out with my friends and stuff and it was because I wasn't use to having a really nice relationship with someone, so I think he just has to get use to your relationship. Give it time

[maniamsmart]

Almost the same thing happened with me and my ex-bf, except I was the one who would tell him I was busy all the time and hang out with my friends and stuff and it was because I wasn't use to having a really nice relationship with someone, so I think he just has to get use to your relationship. Give it time

Exactly. Thank you for sharing that.

[Pop girl]

He may not be ready for a relationship yet. If he is more interested in hanging out with his friends, it is pretty clear he isn't ready yet. I also think that you showing you love him so much, and pouring your feelings out, and having all these expectations is kind of making it hard for him and may be stressing him out a bit.

You both are pretty young, and you may have a good idea about what a relationship is (since girls tend to be more mature), but he probably doesn't. Was this his first relationship? Most boys at this age don't really understand love or the value of a relationship because they are just simply inexperienced, you may just be expecting too much from him.

I was advising one of my friend's relationships where the boy also didn't spend much time with the girl, and he always said he loved her so much, but barely showed it. His problem was that he didn't know how to show it, and wasn't ready for a serious relationship, but the girl was. You may be in the same situation right now, and if that's the case then you have two options. Either one, deal with the fact that he is inexperienced and just kindly tell him what you like to do with him, and ask him if he likes to the same too. You can also suggest what you like about him that makes you happy, or when he does get physical with you (affectionate-wise) tell him that you like it and makes you happy. Just try to drop him hints and help him by telling him what you'd like to have in your relationship with him. And the second option would be to go on a break with your relationship with him and wait till he matures in a year or two.

I've seen both options work out very well. Considering that you are so in love with this boy, I think you should take option one. But when you are doing this, don't be sad or disappointed, because I am sure he does love you, he just doesn't know how to show it and just doesn't seem to know that much about love as you may seem to know.

If it's one thing I highly encourage you to always remember is, it's that relationships are not meant to be perfect. Relationships are meant to have errors, and things in them that you don't like, but the key is to help each other fix these errors and make each other better people. Relationships are learning experiences, and when you find the right relationship you will see that love is all about care, honesty, loyalty, passion, and helping the person you love become better.

I hope this helped and gave you another perspective to look from. If you have any other question feel free to ask.

Thank you so much great advice :) I think stuff is starting to work out. Latley he's been being more affectionate but we still have to figure out how to be affectionate without any awkwardness we've only been dating a short while. What you said makes a lot of sense thank you :)

[maniamsmart]

Thank you so much great advice :) I think stuff is starting to work out. Latley he's been being more affectionate but we still have to figure out how to be affectionate without any awkwardness we've only been dating a short while. What you said makes a lot of sense thank you :)

No problem, am always here to help :) If you have any other questions I'll be here.

[RockyRoad]

like others have said, people mature into relationships at different rates. You said you guys have only been together for a little while? give it sometime to blossom, if you keep pushing things that he's not ready yet, he'll pull back.