Can't get it out of my head

[Paladino]

Long story short, me and my girlfriend had split up for 3 weeks for an unrelated reason a few months back, and after we get back together I find out from someone else that she had kissed my friend during the period we weren't together. UH OH!!! Naturally, I am upset & annoyed that they both would do this to me so soon after me and her had split up. When I found out, I asked her and she said "I am not going to lie, I did and I was going to tell you bla bla. UTTER GARBAGE! I had already asked her before I even found out if she had done anything while we weren't together and she said NO. So she lied about it at first, eventually told me because she knew I had found out from someone else, she wanted me to let it go because she was drunk, they are just friends & we weren't together at the time. Fair enough. Her explanation: "he kissed me first"

His: "She kissed me first"

I heard his explanation at the weekend just passed. One of them is lying. I don't have a fucking clue which one. I haven't brought this up to her. I probably won't because I don't care who kissed who frankly. My only concern is that because they will remain friends, we will all remain friends, it was just a kiss yes BUT, what if when I am not there it happens again? and we ARE together? It is crushing me inside thinking about it. I can't stop for the life of me thinking she will do it again and that she will always be around him.

How do I get over it?
How do I stop being so paranoid that it will happen when we are together?

[mrmee]

First off, to my experience, second chances never work out well. If you break up, move on. But it seems like your already past that point. Next, your relationship is gonna be pretty rocky if it is build on lies and a lack of trust. Now to answer the question you asked. Forget it happened. She fucked up. Shit happens, flush it. Dont worry about it happening again unless you hear about it or see it happening.

[Paladino]

I have to disagree with you about the second chances, because we broke up over something that should never have happened that is unrelated to this. I do trust her I just don't trust other boys. I am trying to let it go & remove my paranoia.

[Zachary G]

its not that you are paranoid about it happening again, you are having trust issues because you feel betrayed by your friend and your then ex-gf. if that is the case then you need to just leave well enough alone and walk away. if you dont have trust in your relationship then you have absolutely nothing to build on.