I still think about my ex girlfriend..

[JakeCake]

Hi all,
I've been wanting to get off this for my chest for a while. My ex girlfriend split up with me on our six month anniversary weekend, after booking a table, customising flowers to her liking at a local florest and having gold/silver couples bracelets custom made.

Now, I was heartbroken at the time and still feel like crying when I think about her. - It's been 2 months, we have intermittent contact.

I ended up doing things with another girl 2 weeks after splitting up - admittedly, I don't like being single... obviously when she found out she was not happy as she kept proposing that we was going to get back together and that it was just a "break" - bullshit... :yes:

The girl I ended up moving on with 2 weeks after splitting up with my ex is now my current girlfriend and believe me when I say I feel awful that I am writing this as I assured her I was well and truly over my ex girlfriend.


I love my current girlfriend at times, but perhaps it's more lust?

My relationship with my ex was real, we've been on holiday, I went to her sisters wedding, I was close to her parents. We had a really good bond, we hit it off great from the start.

I just miss her so much, and I've tried telling her this but she just pretends I never said it, I feel almost non existent.

Please help.

Just to expand a little more on this...

I probably spent a good few days at work just looking at relationship forums, etc.. when we first broke up and I tried my best to keep to the no contact rule but it is so hard to do.

It was a shock when she spit up with me, absolutely did not expect it. It was like 6 months of my life was just over in a click. It was horrible, and she seemed to be absolutely fine?



Merged Double Post. ~StoppingTime

[Cognizant]

I can see where you're coming from. I have really jagged and confusing boundaries when it comes to what I need and want with a romantic relationship. It's not that I have commitment issues, but I lust a lot. I've kinda been in your shoes before.

So if I'm understanding correctly, you want to break up with your current girlfriend and get back with your old one? That's a risky move, but I guess it's possible if your ex is open to the idea. But don't leave your current and try to get back with the former without giving the former some, well, former notice :P, or you'll probably end up even more heartbroken than when you started.

[mrmee]

I follow a rule my bud told me a while ago after my second most recent break up. Never get back with an ex. EVER! Im sure there are a few couples out there on their second go around that actually will make it long term, but from my experience, the chances are subtancially slim. You'll get over them within a month or two, them seeing you over them makes them get over you if they havent already done so, and if your lucky, you can still be friends. If you get back with them, the break up will probably make her bitter towards you. Also proven im my expirences.

[James Dean]

You brought up a very good point. You mentioned that the new girl you are with, you feel as thought most of it is a lust relationship and not a love relationship. So there is a difference between love and lust? Yes there is. I think many times people get love and lust confused. They are very similar, but they are two different things. I see you are in an issue here. I mean at this point I would just continue to learn more about relationships and what you like. If you need to take a break, please do. I don't want you doing anything rash, and making decisions based on lust and not love.

I mean if you are able to regain contact with this girl, or the girl you are currently seeing, just make sure that it is based on love and not lust. That is where most of your problem lies is not understand what love truly is. Just keep your distance for now, and see where the road takes you. Be careful of yourself.

[JakeCake]

Thanks guys, I appreciate it. Perhaps I'll build up the courage to tell her how I feel but I don't feel like right now is the best time to do that.

I'll see how things pan out.

Thanks,
J.