Question for gay/bi people

[Miserabilia]

I guess this belongs in this subforum?
Anyway, I'm not gay/bi myself atleast I'm not really labeling as any sexality but let's say straight. I have a question;

if you are gay/bi, do you tell that to new people you meet/new friends you make?
Do you assume they already know? Do you let them know in advance? Do you think it's not important?
If you tell them, when?

Just wondering, because I guess it matters to some people what your sexuality is and it's weird if they find out later deu to e.g rejection.

[CosmicNoodle]

I don't really meet people and go "Hi, my names Joe and I'm a queer", that'd be weird, and it's not really a defining part of my personality, so why would I bother to tell thewm up front, I just allow it to come up in conversation, if they reject me for it, well fuck them, but I'm carefull enough about who my friends are not to asociate with low lifes like that.

[CassnovA]

Pretty much the same as Joe. It really isnt something that defines me, but if it did come up, i wouldnt hide it.

[Hideous]

if you are gay/bi, do you tell that to new people you meet/new friends you make? Only if they ask me.
Do you assume they already know? Perhaps.
Do you let them know in advance? Yes.
Do you think it's not important? It's not important, I don't know why people would care about who I want or like.
If you tell them, when? Usually when they are curious about how I behave or what I talk about.

[Cognizant]

Most new people I meet say they assumed I'm gay (which is sad because I'm bi), either via rumors or just the way I act/dress. I'm very open with my sexuality at school and even if I don't tell them directly, I'll make hints to my sexuality by saying stuff such as "omg that guy in our English class is soooooooooo fine"

But I don't really bother telling them directly unless they ask or I feel the need to correct them.

[CosmicNoodle]

I'll make hints to my sexuality by saying stuff such as "omg that guy in our English class is soooooooooo fine"

I used to drop hints like that, but then people would asume I'm gay, not Bi, even though it's public knowlege I had a girlfriend at the time I used that tactic....come on add 2 and 2. People always seemed to jump to ether straight or gay, and forget that Bi existed.

[TheN3rdyOutcast]

Since I'm not that flamboyant, and the only clues I drop are the constant staring at my male teachers and exclusive groups of peers, I assume that most people think that I'm straight. Because I've been bullied for things much less than being gay, I tend to hold it in, until I'm sure that the person I'm friends with is either somewhat tolerant or a true friend. Then I tell them.

[Miserabilia]

Ah I guess that makes sense. It's just that a lot of people react awkwardly to different sexualities, atleast here, because it's very uncommon here to be out. I mean they would accept it but it would still be very weird/surprising.

[CosmicNoodle]

Ah I guess that makes sense. It's just that a lot of people react awkwardly to different sexualities, atleast here, because it's very uncommon here to be out. I mean they would accept it but it would still be very weird/surprising.

I do actually know someone who when introducing herself tels you she's gay, everyuone thinks it's weird and unusual. Soooo, ye, not the best conversation starter.

[Babs]

I don't feel the need to be like, "Hi I'm Berea and I'm gay". If they ask, I'll tell them but I feel very little need to make it a big huge deal.

[Elysium]

I will answer honestly whenever someone asks me about my sexuality, no matter who they are. It's not important to me and never has been.

[BoyDivision]

I don't tell them outright but if we're chatting I may mention my girlfriend and then they'll realise that i'm at least a bit gay.

[Dying Ember]

only two people know that I'm bi besides the people on this site. I don't tell people and I don't think they would guess. To me it shouldn't be important.

[DeadEyes]

I will eventually mention it, when I see fit.

[Hudor]

if you are gay/bi, do you tell that to new people you meet/new friends you make? No because as Joe said it isn't the most defining part of my personality and its inappropriate, unnecessary.

Do you assume they already know?Actually no. People arbitrarily consider me straight. If i tell them otherwise, it is taken as a joke because they can't think of me not being straight.

Do you let them know in advance? No, it would be very weird to say the least.

Do you think it's not important? Yes.

If you tell them, when? Apart from VT, i've come out to one friend. I did it as an experiment and it went nicely although he told me he couldn't have guessed until i told him.
Moreover i know fairly well i wouldn't be asked because of all the reasons given above and if someone does ask i would tell them truthfully.

[ImCoolBeans]

No, I don't think it's really important. I don't hide it, or keep it a secret, but I don't see a reason to go around stating your sexuality to people you meet unless it happens to come up in conversation, pertain to something, or if you have a reason to tell them. I think it's kind of inappropriate and unnecessary to do so. If it's somebody you haven't just met, and you want to though, go for it.

[DeadEyes]

No, I don't think it's really important. I don't hide it, or keep it a secret, but I don't see a reason to go around stating your sexuality to people you meet unless it happens to come up in conversation, pertain to something, or if you have a reason to tell them. I think it's kind of inappropriate and unnecessary to do so. If it's somebody you haven't just met, and you want to though, go for it.

It's a good test to find out just how the person is open minded, so I will eventually mention it.

[James Dean]

I just try to be myself. There are some days to where I can straight act, then there are some days to where I feel like being more open. I guess when I befriend somebody, they already have their suspicions of me being gay. I think I really came out to only two of my friends that already knew. I feel unless I'm really close with them, I don't think it's anyone's business. I have many people from class that I just talk to every now and then and the majority of them don't know.

But I guess if it's someone who I am really attached to and they ask, I will tell them. Other than that, I don't see myself opening up to them, or saying within a few minutes of meeting them that information.

[Zachary G]

if you are gay/bi, do you tell that to new people you meet/new friends you make? I dont just announce it like, "Oh by the way I thought you should know, Im gay". No, its really none of thier business, but if they ask me I will not lie about it and just tell them the truth
Do you assume they already know? Do you let them know in advance? Do you think it's not important? I never assume anything, and I dont really think it is that important
If you tell them, when - I usually tell them when they ask or if the topic comes up.

[Karkat]

I will usually wait until I trust them, unless they ask. I really don't see myself lying to anyone I genuinely want to pursue a friendship with. Especially about something that's relatively important.

[vboy]

If they dont need to know I dont tell them

[SethfromMI]

I don't just go out annoucing it, but it is not something I would lie about either,

[aceasarsalad]

I never tell anyone. I'm the type of guy that you wouldn't be able to tell right away either way. Not that there is anything wrong with being able to tell that someone is gay/bi.

It doesn't matter. I'm not a gay guy. I'm a guy, that does gay things in bed. It's not ME, it's a part of what I DO.

Sometimes ppl ask down the road, and I just tell em "I do what I want" or that I f*** boys hahaha. I don't like using labels or words that restrict me.

I'm freeee

[CrazyPerson101]

If I meet someone, I apparently make it painfully obvious im not "str8" but I'm not "gay sounding" so I guess when people meet me, they kinda judge me but I don't tell said people untill I feel I can trust them

[ethana512]

I am not out yet but I am thinking about doing it soon.

[Abyssal Echo]

I don't really meet people and go "Hi, my names Joe and I'm a queer", that'd be weird, and it's not really a defining part of my personality, so why would I bother to tell thewm up front, I just allow it to come up in conversation, if they reject me for it, well fuck them, but I'm carefull enough about who my friends are not to asociate with low lifes like that.

Pretty much the same as Joe. It really isnt something that defines me, but if it did come up, i wouldnt hide it.

I'm pretty much the same as Joe and Cass. I don't advertise that I'm gay but if if someone asks or it comes up in a conversation I wont deny it.

[soft]

It comes eventually when you friendship grows.

[Luminous]

I once was in a show with this guy and on the very first day of rehearsal, first words we ever exchanged, he said, "Hi, I'm __ and I'm gay" and it was just.. weird. There was no need for that. I didn't mind it exactly, it was just strange. I definitely don't do that and I see no reason to do that. If someone asks me, I will tell them, but other than that, I won't tell you unless it comes up in conversation. I'm very feminine so most people assume I'm straight and don't ask. It's no secret, but it's also not a defining part of my personality and telling someone as soon as I meet them is not necessary.

[Faolan]

I won't tell them unless it somehow comes up in conversation. Why should it be any of their business who I'd like to sleep with? I'm the president of my school's GSA, though, so it does pop into conversation a lot. I just play along with however a situation unfolds, I guess. If they seem homophobic, I won't bring it up, but I'll try to challenge their beliefs.

[Foamy]

Those that I want to know will know, whether now or in the future. I'm comfortable with who knows now, and I don't really plan on telling any others any time soon.

[leahmae]

my friends know that i'm bi, and most of them are as well. i don't mention it right away, but if it comes up in conversation later, and if i trust the person I'll tell them.

[Meh Guy]

I don't specifically go out and say, "hey I'm bi!" But I mean if they ask or if it happens to come up in conversation I don't lie, I'll tell them. But I have a few friends who still probably think I'm straight because its never come up.

[Semi_IronMan]

I'm bi curious but if the topic comes up I wouldn't shy away from it