How to say no??

[Dalcourt]

I go to school with a really nice girl. She is a very good friend and I like her really very very much. I go out with her a lot, shopping , parties, movies you name it. I'm really happy and at ease around her...well was.

Cuz yesterday we had been celebrating with others and all were slightly intoxicated. And there it happened...she kissed me. I was really kinda shocked. I mean not just an innocent kiss but she forced her tongue in in earnest. I got angry... asked wtf, she knows I'm gay...like really gay not bi or curious or whatever...She started crying and I apologized. We made up but I had a weir feeling when I got home.

This morning when we met at the bus she hugged me...nothing unusual but then she grabbed my ass...I tried to ignore it I don't want to make a big deal out of it. She started holding hands on school grounds with me...I told her again I'm not interested and she got all sad and ashamed that I felt bad having said something.

I excused myself for this night so I don't have to spend it with her usually I often sleep at her place over the weekend. She acted so depressed about it that I let her kiss me again after we left the bus.

I feel at a total loss what to do...I don't want to hurt her feelings but I can't be with her the way she obviously wants it? I mean I won't die of her touching or kissing me but I feel uncomfortable, have no desire for her and pretending will just hurt het in the long run.

How to tell her no? I don't want to hurt her and want to stay friends she's very important to me. Any advice?
Sorry for the long post.

[Blood]

Absolutely do not do anything you're uncomfortable with. If she is making you feel uncomfortable by inappropriate touching, and then trying to guilt trip you about it...well that's just desperate quite frankly. Put your foot down and talk to her about this; tell her this needs to stop now. Going along with it because you're worried about hurting her isn't going to get you anywhere in this situation.

[Perfectly Flawed]

If you do not want to be touched you can't beat around the bush. Tell her straight up that what she is doing is not only inappropriate, but makes you feel uncomfortable around her. Some people just don't understand what they're doing is wrong unless it's very directly told to them.

[Gumleaf]

Absolutely do not do anything you're uncomfortable with. If she is making you feel uncomfortable by inappropriate touching, and then trying to guilt trip you about it...well that's just desperate quite frankly. Put your foot down and talk to her about this; tell her this needs to stop now. Going along with it because you're worried about hurting her isn't going to get you anywhere in this situation.

Precisely this, and i'll add that the longer you leave it to talk to her about it, the worse it's going to be for hurting her and damaging your friendship. Sometimes people, both guys and girls, will have it in their head that they can win the person they like over, like eventually they'll like them too. So that's why it's important to knock it on the head early on.

[CosmicNoodle]

Absolutely do not do anything you're uncomfortable with. If she is making you feel uncomfortable by inappropriate touching, and then trying to guilt trip you about it...well that's just desperate quite frankly. Put your foot down and talk to her about this; tell her this needs to stop now. Going along with it because you're worried about hurting her isn't going to get you anywhere in this situation.

This exactly, out your foot down, if not for you, for her, it'll hurt less in the long run.
There was a guy in my PE class who I liked me like that, I'm bi and everything but I just wasn't I terested, he kept grabing my ass at random times, and once kissed me out of no where, in situations like that you have to put your foot down and just say your not I terested and that it makes you uncomfortable, she k ows your gay right? Why is she even making these advances? Is she somehow Hoping to turn you straight?

[Dalcourt]

This exactly, out your foot down, if not for you, for her, it'll hurt less in the long run.
There was a guy in my PE class who I liked me like that, I'm bi and everything but I just wasn't I terested, he kept grabing my ass at random times, and once kissed me out of no where, in situations like that you have to put your foot down and just say your not I terested and that it makes you uncomfortable, she k ows your gay right? Why is she even making these advances? Is she somehow Hoping to turn you straight?

If you do not want to be touched you can't beat around the bush. Tell her straight up that what she is doing is not only inappropriate, but makes you feel uncomfortable around her. Some people just don't understand what they're doing is wrong unless it's very directly told to them.

Absolutely do not do anything you're uncomfortable with. If she is making you feel uncomfortable by inappropriate touching, and then trying to guilt trip you about it...well that's just desperate quite frankly. Put your foot down and talk to her about this; tell her this needs to stop now. Going along with it because you're worried about hurting her isn't going to get you anywhere in this situation.

I know that you all are totally right. I just feel unsure what to do...I mean I told her I don't like it and she knows that I'm gay and all. But still...I like her a lot and feel bad when I hurt her. I didn't go to her last night as I said before, and she texted and emailed me and what not...I feel extremely guilty for making her sad. I want her to be happy and...ah I dunno. It's like, she lets me stay at her place when I have trouble with my Dad...and I feel like I use her and not being able to repay her the way she wants it.

[ChrisTJ]

I agree with the others, you just need to tell her that what she's doing is not right and that you're not OK with it. I mean she'd not be OK with some boy she didn't have feelings for doing that to her! You can tell her that you still like her as a friend and still wanna hang out with her and stuff but that the kissing and touching needs to stop as it doesn't feel right to her. Ultimately you need to look out for yourself on this one.