Celtics
August 28th, 2014, 08:36 PM
Not sure if this goes here, but yeah... Here is the background.
Elementary school- Had really bad Apraxia and Dyslexia bad. I still had friends though, you could even say "popular" if you wanted to (hate that word now). I switched schools, for zoning purposes and found new friends again say I was with the "popular".
Middle School- One day in like 7th grade, they all just stopped talking to me, without a explanation or anything. Just woke up, and everything was different. Didn't have one friend anymore, and I'm a really shy person. After going through a couple of lunch tables, I found a group. Became really close friends with them for 2 years, until we went to different high schools.
High School- freshman year, had no friends really would talk to people but really no friends. It wasnt great but not bad, just ehh. Sophomore year, the same but a little bit worse. Now this year, its awful. I don't have one friend anymore, don't even go to lunch. I sit in my car or go the library or something since I would set alone. I gained more weight over the summers, now losing weight due to medical issues which haven't helped. Now I'm starting to talk to people in school, but not one person has texted me first for months, maybe a year. My "best friend" that moved and goes to a different school now never talks to me. We never talk, we were really close I thought, only person I was ever comfortable around. I almost shared everything with him. One day, he just stopped talking to me. I would text him saying I guess were not friends anymore, but he says we are. He hasn't texted me first for about a year. I can't tell you the last time I texted/talked to him. He knows a lot about me, that no one else does. I don't even trust him anymore. I have no one. I feel worse since I know there are people that have it a lot worse than me. I just don't know if I can handle another 2 years like this. Its just getting worse, family is falling apart, friendships are gone. Everything I cared about, is going away. (Im christian) I'm losing faith, I've done things which no one should do. I'm in constant fear, depression, anger, confusion, doubt..... Just don't get out so many things can go wrong, and just get worse. I'm one of the nicest people you will ever meet, I never do anything mean or rude. I treat everyone like they should be treated, I put everyone before me, even though I shouldn't. I look at old friends and just feel confusion, my elementary friends and middle school friends are now friends go figure that. This is just a stupid rant, sorry. Just lost, and don't know what to do. Have no one to talk to anymore. I hope you never have to wake up every morning wishing you will die, and then hopefully people will finally notice you. I need something, and I don't even know what I need. I just want to drive off a cliff, and pray I don't end up in hell. Music is the only thing keeping me alive at this point.
Elementary school- Had really bad Apraxia and Dyslexia bad. I still had friends though, you could even say "popular" if you wanted to (hate that word now). I switched schools, for zoning purposes and found new friends again say I was with the "popular".
Middle School- One day in like 7th grade, they all just stopped talking to me, without a explanation or anything. Just woke up, and everything was different. Didn't have one friend anymore, and I'm a really shy person. After going through a couple of lunch tables, I found a group. Became really close friends with them for 2 years, until we went to different high schools.
High School- freshman year, had no friends really would talk to people but really no friends. It wasnt great but not bad, just ehh. Sophomore year, the same but a little bit worse. Now this year, its awful. I don't have one friend anymore, don't even go to lunch. I sit in my car or go the library or something since I would set alone. I gained more weight over the summers, now losing weight due to medical issues which haven't helped. Now I'm starting to talk to people in school, but not one person has texted me first for months, maybe a year. My "best friend" that moved and goes to a different school now never talks to me. We never talk, we were really close I thought, only person I was ever comfortable around. I almost shared everything with him. One day, he just stopped talking to me. I would text him saying I guess were not friends anymore, but he says we are. He hasn't texted me first for about a year. I can't tell you the last time I texted/talked to him. He knows a lot about me, that no one else does. I don't even trust him anymore. I have no one. I feel worse since I know there are people that have it a lot worse than me. I just don't know if I can handle another 2 years like this. Its just getting worse, family is falling apart, friendships are gone. Everything I cared about, is going away. (Im christian) I'm losing faith, I've done things which no one should do. I'm in constant fear, depression, anger, confusion, doubt..... Just don't get out so many things can go wrong, and just get worse. I'm one of the nicest people you will ever meet, I never do anything mean or rude. I treat everyone like they should be treated, I put everyone before me, even though I shouldn't. I look at old friends and just feel confusion, my elementary friends and middle school friends are now friends go figure that. This is just a stupid rant, sorry. Just lost, and don't know what to do. Have no one to talk to anymore. I hope you never have to wake up every morning wishing you will die, and then hopefully people will finally notice you. I need something, and I don't even know what I need. I just want to drive off a cliff, and pray I don't end up in hell. Music is the only thing keeping me alive at this point.