Coping with not exploring sexuality

[dreamofdante]

I'm obviously a very sexual person but I'm 18 years old, nearly 19 and I have yet to have any romantic or sexual encounter with a woman because of my looks and because I'm partially shy due to my looks. I wanted to experiment for years but it seems like the lack of sexual encounters in my teen years has really done worse on me than anything. At this point because of my past experiences I'm going to go out on a limb and say I'll never lose my virginity but the real point of this is how would you recommend me coping with not exploring my sexuality? It's something I'm constantly thinking about and wanting to do but never able to because of my looks.

[ChrisTJ]

Well there are plenty of ways to explore your sexuality without a girlfriend. Many teens, even those that have lost their virginity still experiment on their own a lot and it brings them great joy. Also some guys who feel that due to their looks they are unlikely to get anyone interested in them decide to erm...pay for it. Could be a possibility? Otherwise just keep looking, there are girls out there, like myself, who would compromise on looks for a good personality!

[dreamofdante]

Well there are plenty of ways to explore your sexuality without a girlfriend. Many teens, even those that have lost their virginity still experiment on their own a lot and it brings them great joy. Also some guys who feel that due to their looks they are unlikely to get anyone interested in them decide to erm...pay for it. Could be a possibility? Otherwise just keep looking, there are girls out there, like myself, who would compromise on looks for a good personality!

There's not much I can do with myself experimentally speaking because I've had seven years now. I don't think I want to risk jail time for it but yeah...People always told me I'm a sweet guy with a nice personality but I don't know. Hasn't really mattered much. I tend to get used for affection and making people feel better because I'm so nice to them.

[dreamofdante]

Bump

[goatboy963]

don't worry mann. i'm twenty two and am still a virgin. i haven't done much experimenting either. i don't let it bother me.

[dreamofdante]

don't worry mann. i'm twenty two and am still a virgin. i haven't done much experimenting either. i don't let it bother me.

Damn I have no idea how you cope. In fact, I don't know how I'll cope at your age haha

[goatboy963]

porn lol. i think it really has to do with me being independent though.

[dreamofdante]

porn lol. i think it really has to do with me being independent though.

Porn makes it worse haha

[dreamofdante]

I'd say just play some halo 4, maybe you'll meet a nice girl on there and start a good relationship. I love Halo.

Hahahahahaha they say Halo 4 is the new eHarmony.

[Warrior]

Hahahahahaha they say Halo 4 is the new eHarmony.

I heard that

[Snydergate]

I'm obviously a very sexual person but I'm 18 years old, nearly 19 and I have yet to have any romantic or sexual encounter with a woman because of my looks and because I'm partially shy due to my looks. I wanted to experiment for years but it seems like the lack of sexual encounters in my teen years has really done worse on me than anything. At this point because of my past experiences I'm going to go out on a limb and say I'll never lose my virginity but the real point of this is how would you recommend me coping with not exploring my sexuality? It's something I'm constantly thinking about and wanting to do but never able to because of my looks.

Dude, I am pretty much going through the same thing. I am 19 and have yet to do ANYTHING with a girl, never been on a date, nothing. I guess since it had never happened I am just getting more used to it. I used to be mad at myself alot and sometimes I still get like that, but I am coping with it well. I was never able to go through my experimental teen years, so they are kinda trying to happen now. I have gotten more curious over the years, but I know I am straight for many reasons. Just hang in there and we will both loose it soon. I know it

[dreamofdante]

Dude, I am pretty much going through the same thing. I am 19 and have yet to do ANYTHING with a girl, never been on a date, nothing. I guess since it had never happened I am just getting more used to it. I used to be mad at myself alot and sometimes I still get like that, but I am coping with it well. I was never able to go through my experimental teen years, so they are kinda trying to happen now. I have gotten more curious over the years, but I know I am straight for many reasons. Just hang in there and we will both loose it soon. I know it

I'm sure you will man but I don't think so with me. I'm not like anyone I've ever met.

[Snydergate]

You are way too hard on yourself man

[dreamofdante]

You are way too hard on yourself man

I'm just too realistic about everything.

[ChrisTJ]

I'm sure you'll manage at some point. What is it about yourself that makes you think no one's going to be interested. Is it looks? Personality? Shyness? I want to understand.

[dreamofdante]

I'm sure you'll manage at some point. What is it about yourself that makes you think no one's going to be interested. Is it looks? Personality? Shyness? I want to understand.

My looks really hold me back. Especially when dealing with sexuality. I've done stupid things so I guess my personality can hold me back but usually I try to be nice to everyone I can and be polite because it's how I was raised. I used to be REALLY shy but not too much anymore. I would say it's mostly looks.

[ChrisTJ]

Looks are nonsense, take it from me. People say I'm quite good looking and I certainly don't think I'm particularly bad looking and my current crush is, being honest, not great in the looks department. However he's a nice honest guy who makes me laugh and is great to be around and I'm totally head over heels! With some girls being too much of a good friend can lead you to be friend zoned too quickly. Tips for that are, by all means be nice and polite but don't be over friendly and don't always be available. If a girl wants to meet for coffee don't clear your diary for her, make her wait a while. Basically what I'm trying to say is make her chase you a little. Nothing I like more than a chase, as long as I do get signs that it's worth the chase!

[dreamofdante]

Looks are nonsense, take it from me. People say I'm quite good looking and I certainly don't think I'm particularly bad looking and my current crush is, being honest, not great in the looks department. However he's a nice honest guy who makes me laugh and is great to be around and I'm totally head over heels! With some girls being too much of a good friend can lead you to be friend zoned too quickly. Tips for that are, by all means be nice and polite but don't be over friendly and don't always be available. If a girl wants to meet for coffee don't clear your diary for her, make her wait a while. Basically what I'm trying to say is make her chase you a little. Nothing I like more than a chase, as long as I do get signs that it's worth the chase!

The thing with me is I've never had anyone show signs of interest in me so that kind of sets me off. I don't want to make an idiot out of myself so I don't want to do a whole bunch of things for her attention. Not to mention I've had someone lead me on for two years straight even when I tried to go out with her and she randomly dates this one guy I've never even heard of. If looks aren't the problem with me, then I'm truly scared.

[ChrisTJ]

The thing with me is I've never had anyone show signs of interest in me so that kind of sets me off. I don't want to make an idiot out of myself so I don't want to do a whole bunch of things for her attention. Not to mention I've had someone lead me on for two years straight even when I tried to go out with her and she randomly dates this one guy I've never even heard of. If looks aren't the problem with me, then I'm truly scared.

People who lead others on like that are not worth your time, she is beneath you. I really don't know what to suggest other than keep trying and keep going out and trying to meet new people. Most of the time someone comes up when you least expect them to and from the most random of places.

[dreamofdante]

People who lead others on like that are not worth your time, she is beneath you. I really don't know what to suggest other than keep trying and keep going out and trying to meet new people. Most of the time someone comes up when you least expect them to and from the most random of places.

Yeah forget her. Thanks though. I'm just pretty hopeless now. I haven't had anyone show real interest since I was a kid and I still haven't kissed anyone so I kind of feel unlovable. That's hard to live with. Thanks for talking ChrisTJ.