Help me let this go for good, support needed please :)

[chemical_horizon]

Hey, my name's Asha and i need a bit of help and support with my situation

couple of years ago i was in a really lovely, fairly long-term and "perfect" relationship with a guy who I fell for pretty quickly and I was assured on a regular basis he loved me. He then had to leave for college around 50 minutes away and had assured me not to worry, as he would be home whenever he could and "the best is yet to come" (see song) was the song he gave to me just before he left...
I found out within the next few weeks that it had taken only a couple of days for him to start sleeping around, and one girl was a regular, after which he became distant and cold, uncaring about how I felt or the problems I was facing at home myself.. my work had suffered a massive blow due to family complications, there were vicious rumors spread about me around my school, my grandparents (both) had recently passed and my parents marriage was on the brink of collapse. TLDR He told me to stop whining and get on with it, what could he do and what did I want from him, when I was upset and crying on the phone to him... he kept dismissing the cheating and as i had no reason not to believe him, I stayed with him for another 2 weeks, but by then I had enough and chucked his stuff at him, and he scoffed at my neutral and cold attitude towards him.
two Years later i'm in a new relationship with my best friend of six years ( :eek: made it out the friendzone!!) but I have a problem, although he was in college for the past 10/11 months we have been dating, and i trusted him almost completely, the fear still of cheating always in the back in my mind, September is rolling round and even more i'm terrified of him being taken in by the "new meat" and forgetting about me, despite him telling me often he cares deeply for me and had liked and indeed for the past two years, been in love with me, his brother who dislikes him also backing this up and telling me that he couldn't shut up about me for the first month.
I trust him, he trusts me, but I can't forget about what happened before, I can't escape the anxious feeling i get about him going back to college and totally forgetting about me and leaving me in the same position I was in all that time ago :confused: please help me with some advice for completely trusting my current boyfriend and letting go of what damage the previous dickbrain caused....:mad:

[Harley Quinn]

It's always going to be in the back of your mind, that's just how things are and honestly, the only way to get over it is to remove all the negativity surrounding it. You need to work on the issues you have with cheating and you have to remember that not every relationship you get in, will end the way it did before. You just have to fully move on, which I know isn't easy but at the end of the day, if you do love this dude, you need to voice your concerns with him too because communication is everything in a relationship. Any time you start thinking of the past, write it down, set it on fire or throw it away and think of that as letting it all go. The faster you act on the thoughts the better because otherwise you'll just wallow in paranoid feelings.

[Gumleaf]

In life we learn from our experiences, but in those experiences we should also learn that every person should be taken at face value and be given a chance. I agree with Siobhan that, if you haven't already, talk to your boyfriend about what happened last time and how you feel about it and why it scares you that he is leaving for collage. I'm sure I don't have to tell you this and you already know, but just be sure to be tactful when you talk to him about it so you don't accidently imply that you think he will cheat. As for you, the past will always be there and you can't change it. Sometimes people change when they move away and their life situation changes and the effects of that can cause hurt and pain. But in life sometimes you have to take risks to find happiness and two people can never be judged the same. I hope it all works out nicely for you. :)