Help please.

[MadMatt959]

I like my coworker and she knows it. I asked her out before on Facebook and she said that she was flattered but was seeing someone else and she was sorry. We do talk a lot but we never talk about relationships which is a good thing. When we talk she seems to pay attention to what I am saying and she smiles and sometimes play with her hair. Lately it seems like trying to lead me on. She does smile at me a lot and we talk a lot just for fun. At work she waters I am in charge of, she is doing that to be nice. The other day she took a nap in the back of her van and I walked by after lunch and she says hey to me and explains how she never knew how comfy the back of her van was until that time. She talks about how her and her exboyfriend hang out. I don't know if she is trying to get me jealous when she does that. The other day we were at a party and I was drunk and we were hanging out with other people and other girls were having fun with me because I could do things like sit down, she got up and she left. I think she got a little jealous. When she got to the party she said hi to me first. We were talking to the same people in a group and she kept looking at me and smiling.She also were a tank top, which showed her cleavage. We outside before she I was drunk and we with with other people and when we were talking I spilt my drink and she said while laughing mad Matt is drunk. So I don't know what she thinks about me or if she is starting to like me. There is a 3 year age difference which I don't care. Pleas help. :confused:

[CharlieHorse]

Talk to her
Be honest
Be yourself

[Seemyheart]

All I can say is keep trying to get to know her :)
3 years isn't TOO bad..

[ksdnfkfr]

Just get to know her better so she's not a stranger you don't know what to do with.

[Lost in the Echo]

I agree with Ezra. Get to know her a little better. If you do that, you'll feel more comfortable making the decision whether or not to ask her out. Also, if you hang out with her regularly, it could help you detect if she has feelings for you too.

[tmack1908]

Three years is a decently sized gap.. Just be careful because if a relationship does happen to come about between you two, and if you're over 18 while she isn't, that could be illegal.

[PinkFloyd]

Just be yourself and keep talking to her and don't let the pot smoking get in the way.

[Melodic]

Get to know her. Show her who you are. Find things to do with her outside of work.

Just remember, if things don't go the way you expect them. You still have to work with her.

[Karkat]

I think you're tying a loooot into this. She's friendly, which is good, but saying "hey" is kind of a thing Hollywood has made to over-exaggerate things.

If you like her, ask her. The worst thing she can do is say no. I know rejection is tough, but you don't have anything to lose, right?

[DiamondsGirl]

VT receive questions like this probably 500x each month LOL whatever happened to the old-fashioned "SPAAARTAAA"? Just go for it, love! :)

[MadMatt959]

It's just a hard choice. If I ask her out and she says yes that will be good. But then if we break up, it would make work odd. If she says no, work might be different. So yesterday, we were at work and she yelled "hey" to me and waved. Then asked me a question to help her find something. Today she saw me eating lunch in my car and asked me if I wanted to come over to the group she was having lunch with. I am just having mixed feeling about what I should do

[Camazotz]

Asking someone on a date doesn't automatically mean you're boyfriend/girlfriend (at least it shouldn't it, your culture might be different where you're from). But it sounds like she just sees you as a friend and you are reading too much into her courteous behavior. If you really like her, just say something simple and casual like "Hey, that new movie looks really good, do you want to see it with me sometime?" I know it's nerve-wracking, but afterward you'll be glad you asked and didn't live in wonder of what could've been. Just be confident! Good luck!

[BuryYourFlame]

Personally, I think you're reading way too much in to everything.
Start a friendship first and see where things can go from there. It's a good sign that she invited you to sit with her, but only a sign of friendship at the moment.

[Poison_Ivy]

Personally, I think you're reading way too much in to everything.
Start a friendship first and see where things can go from there. It's a good sign that she invited you to sit with her, but only a sign of friendship at the moment.

I agree with this, if you really like her you'll be able to wait a little longer, being friends is always a good start

[Pensive]

Personally, I think you're reading way too much in to everything.
Start a friendship first and see where things can go from there. It's a good sign that she invited you to sit with her, but only a sign of friendship at the moment.

This is what I was thinking, so she said hello to you? So what? Doesn't anyone else say hello to you? o.O?!

Try talking to her like any other human being, start by actually getting to know her personality not just what she looks like. Don't sit in your car like a weirdo alone, go hang out with her!

[Menzis]

Just because a girl says hey doesn't mean shes into you, but if you are into her just talk.

[Horatio Nelson]

I think you're tying a loooot into this. She's friendly, which is good, but saying "hey" is kind of a thing Hollywood has made to over-exaggerate things.

If you like her, ask her. The worst thing she can do is say no. I know rejection is tough, but you don't have anything to lose, right?

Definitely agree here.

Just ask her dude.

[MadMatt959]

I might just be over thinking it a bit. I am not a weirdo for eating my lunch in my car, there is no other place to eat at my job. If I was going to ask her out, I can't figure out how to do without making it awkward at work if she says no. I was thinking to ask her to hang sometime and see where it goes from there.

[BuryYourFlame]

That's a good starting point. From past experience though, and experience from friends, remember that this is only as friendship. Many people absolutely destroy any chance they had at a relationship because from the beginning they had different thoughts and intentions.
It depends on how old you are/your parents/if you drive or not and other things as to how easy it will be but...
Just ask her if she wants to do something (as you suggested), something in public like going to a movie or lunch is a good place to start.

[MadMatt959]

Today she said "hey" to me a few times. She wore short shorts at work. It was hard not to stare at her when she was wearing them. She also was fixing/playing with her hair as I walked by sometimes even though she was wearing a hat and her hair was in a ponytail.

[highschool]

go for it, you'll never know unless you try.

[hood]

Playing with her her and staring at you are very good signs. Just saying hello could be a sign but then maybe not. Try to compliment her a bit when you see her at work being like "goodmorning, woah, blue looks great on you" or something like that. When you talk to her remember to smile and always go after small talk about whatever. Just make sure not to overdo it with the compliments. According to her general reaction make your move and dont really think what will happen if she rejects you, just be ready for both yes or no. "no guts, no glory..."

[everlong]

I would say go for it. She seems like she could very well be a bit interested in you. And if she says no, just be cool about it. Work doesn't have to be awkward as long as you don't make it awkward.

[MadMatt959]

Yesterday she waved and said "hey" to me again today. It seems like every time she waves to me she smiles. Today she said "hey" to me a couple of times but I still can figure out if it's a "hey" like a greeting or one that means I like you. She also asked me to help her find something but she could tell I didn't know where it was. I also said "nice hat" to her in a joking way and she said "thanks" back is a joking way. She also played with her hair again a couple of times and said "bye" to me at work. We don't always say bye to each other.

[Camazotz]

I think you're reading too much into this; she could just be a friendly person. If you're interested, make it obvious, and gauge how she reacts. If she seems interested, ask her out. If she doesn't feel the same way, then at least you tried.

[MadMatt959]

So I asked her out and she said "Thank you very much Matt, that's really nice of you and I'm flattered but I'm seeing someone right now I'm sorry." I find that strange because she never mention the person she is seeing and she still smiles at me once and a while. Today she volunteered to help me with the perennials at work. I called her a life saver the person who was telling me what to bring out was telling me a lot and I was doing it all day by myself. When I told her she was a life saver she laughed. We had a few laughs today.

[bob97]

I think that you need to talk more besides just hey. Get a conversation going. Offer to go get lunch with her or something. If that all goes well then go for it!

[bob97]

Nvm just read your last post. That sucks dude

[MadMatt959]

It does suck. I am trying to figure put if she is lying about the other person because she never mention the other person. She also smiles at me and she also says "hey" to me throughout the day.

[RavleIncarnate]

This is awkward. But I know that. Lot of girls say the same, cuz they aren't in their right mind when asked about something like that. Trust me, it might just be a reflex. Whether she really is seeing someone is still actually unknown. And you should go further than the "heys", go for a full-on converstation next time.

[MadMatt959]

I just don't want her to lead me on so I think she likes me when she doesn't like me. I would rather had her say "no" when I asked her out because I am thinking there might be a chance that she wants to date me. She never said "no".

[Blood]

She could be lying about the other person or she couldn't, who knows? What you DO know is that she politely declined, so you need need to drop the subject and move on.

[Karkat]

She might like you, but unless you have reasonable evidence to conclude that she IS in fact single, don't pursue it. Not only is that kind of a sketchy thing to do to begin with, but you don't want the kind of girl who will stray from the person she's with just because she's bored or whatever. Because she'll do it to you too.