Long distance please help!

[ionray1999]

Okay, so I'm not usually the best with woman, but yesterday this girl and I met and we really hit it off together fast. We hanged out all day and we both really had a good time. I got her number and snapchat but there is one problem... She lives about 700 miles away, I met her on my last day of vacation in Texas... I'm only 15 so i have no way of seeing her or hanging out or anything, only texting and calling.... I have never met a girl like this and i really really do think she is the one... What should i do? It's just my luck to meet the girl of my dreams that actually likes me back, and have her live impossibly far away from me... Does anyone have any advise or something to help me out? I would really appreciate anything you could say. Please help!

[Karkat]

Well, LDRs can be very fulfilling if you can make them work, but they're not for everybody. Skype a lot. Call a lot. Send each other gifts. You might want to invest in apps made for couples- sometimes that's a really cute way to just let each other know you're thinking of them.

It all depends on what your mindset it, and how much you're willing to devote to it. If you have any other questions, just ask. :) (most of my friends live far away, and nearly all of my relationships have been either LDRs, or distance relationships of some sort. [wouldn't count 30 miles away as an LDR, but it's still very challenging given our circumstances, and plays out a lot like an LDR.])

[Remora]

[-]I looked behind me, there's a wall there. Oh well.[/-]
I think the two of you can just keep in touch via chats and texting and calling. Yeah... simple advice but it works for me.

[ionray1999]

Thanks guys, I'll try some of these out, i just really wish we could hang out some times...

[Remora]

[-]There is still a wall behind me D:[/-]
If the love persists on both sides then eventually you could try meeting later (when you're old enough)

[ionray1999]

Thanks for the advice guys, we talked about it and we think we can make it work. We planned on going to see each other about once a month in person. :) thanks again guys.

[Gottaloveaginger14]

My man and I were long distance for a long time
One word for ya- skype

[Cognizant]

It requires a lot of self determination and patience, in my experience.

It's something I didn't have enough of - I'm too clingy. When I was in a LDR with someone who lived across the country from me, it just didn't feel fair to me that I couldn't see my partner in person, and be able to do things with them and cuddle with them and etc. etc. Hell I even felt that way with my ex who I saw every weekend when we dated. But if you have the patience for it and you're able to wait patiently for the day that you're able to see them again, then there's no issues with dating long distance :)

[Rallo]

I was in an LDR for 16months, they're not impossible.

The main things needed are contact and trust and plans.
Contact is quite simply; keeping the messages going, making time to call, etc. This part's not too hard, keep it balanced though; don't let it get to the point where you're giving up major things in your life (skipping school, skipping events, etc) to stay home talking to them on the phone. Keep your separate lives intact while making time when possible to talk.
Trust is one of the harder things; They're still going to have other people to talk to and other people they'll be in contact with. You need to be able to trust each other here, which can be extremely hard. In all situations be as honest as you can, even if you feel as if it may hurt them at the time. As soon as trust is broken, things will slowly go down hill, that's how my relationship ended. This is the main aspect of an LDR.
Thirdly is plans, planning the future. Set a date that you want to meet them by and really work towards making it happen. 700miles isn't the worse, once you're a bit older it's just a long train/bus ride there and somewhere to stay a night, maybe $500 tops for a roundtrip. Plan a date to try and meet her again by and make it happen!

[ionray1999]

Okay, so things got really in depth today. She asked if we could talk about something and she said that she loves with all of her heart and she hopes i can understand that we will both be freshman in highschool, and we will be meeting a lot of new people when the summer ends, and she wanted me to know that the distance is killing her and she just wants someone to cuddle with. So if she meets someone new that she really likes, she might leave me and go be with him. We talked a lot later and it was obvious that she really loves me and I love her. She even said that she thinks I'm the one. But the distance is just too much. It almost killed me, but I said i understood and that I was okay with it. We are still dating, but did i do the right thing? And do you think I should be worried? She did say she doubted that should would find someone, but she just wanted me to keep an open mind about what could happen. What does this mean?

[Jean Poutine]

Okay, so things got really in depth today. She asked if we could talk about something and she said that she loves with all of her heart and she hopes i can understand that we will both be freshman in highschool, and we will be meeting a lot of new people when the summer ends, and she wanted me to know that the distance is killing her and she just wants someone to cuddle with. So if she meets someone new that she really likes, she might leave me and go be with him. We talked a lot later and it was obvious that she really loves me and I love her. She even said that she thinks I'm the one. But the distance is just too much. It almost killed me, but I said i understood and that I was okay with it. We are still dating, but did i do the right thing? And do you think I should be worried? She did say she doubted that should would find someone, but she just wanted me to keep an open mind about what could happen. What does this mean?

It means that it's as good as done. Honestly. I don't want to shit on your parade but there you have it. You are living through what we French call un amour de vacances. The term implies that what happens during vacations does not extend beyond said vacations, except that with global communications technology, that game has changed quite a bit and has brought on ambiguity as to what vacation love stories entail.

You are not so special that she can't replace you with another model that's closer (way closer) to her. Nobody really is. I don't think that anybody is "the one" for anybody else. There are people that get along exceptionally well, just well, or don't get along at all, but nobody gets along perfectly with anybody else, and people change. You might be "the one" for her in this point in time, and her "the one" for you, but what about in 6 months? A year? 5 years? You're teenagers, you don't even have your own personality set in yet, in 5 years she could be shooting heroin with hobos, or you could. Who really knows?

Truth is when you're really in love you shouldn't think about being with anyone else, even despite the distance. People wait on their lovers (well, sometimes) when they are shipped off to war. I'm willing to bet many faithfully wait when their significant other is off to some forsaken country in the armpit of the world for months or even years doing humanitarian work. If you were really "the one" to her, why would she even bring up potentially replacing you? Who would spit on such a statistical improbability just for instant gratification cuddles? And keep in mind it sounds like this relationship has been going on for only two weeks, and she's already considering her options. Just more proof this "the one" stuff is BS.

You are 15 and she's probably around the same age. At that age, a 700 miles relationship is not serious. It can't be. Both of you shouldn't cloister yourselves and avoid potentially very pleasant surprises that are much closer to you and offer much more of a chance at a stable, more fulfilling relationship. Teen romances very rarely last, so why make it harder on yourself "dating" a girl who lives so far away? Enjoy your youth instead. You might think she's the one now etc etc, but assuming that it's your first love story, we all think that for the first one, that he or she is perfect and awesome and we'll never meet anybody as amazing as the person we're in love with currently. It's a side-effect of the bullshit media shovels down our throats, that everybody is destined to meet his/her perfect other half and you just have to surmount every and any obstacle in your way and if you do it'll work...eventually! Don't fall for it. It's idealized, marketed, mercantile romance, and if you want your love life to not be abysmal, you're going to have to be quite a bit more pragmatic than that. I learned that knock by experience.

It wouldn't be that bad if you guys were older and could travel to see each other on the semi-regular, but at this point in time, my recommendation to you is not to be held up in this. She said she doesn't think she'll meet somebody else, but marriages break over this at every hour of the day, and besides, unless she's a seer or something, she really can't know that or even offer any opinion on the matter. Everyone can meet somebody else, and honestly, most do, especially at 15 where it's a vast majority more than anything else : it's actually pretty damn rare to find a high school sweetheart, and have the all-American perfect romance story. Save yourself a heartbreak and preemptively explore. You guys say you're dating - you can't be dating since she is 700 miles away! It's not like you guys got together for a coffee every weekend. Go on a real date instead. You don't have to be improper towards your girlfriend, you don't have to cheat on her, I'm just telling you to date girls you can actually see in the flesh more often than just on the Greek calends. Learn to know other people and honestly reflect on their compatibility with you and the pros and cons of your girlfriend being such a long haul away. And if you find somebody you would be just as happy with, don't be afraid to break it off. When you meet somebody else just as awesome as her, if not more than her, and she lives just a bus ride away, it'll all have been worth it.