Confession kills friendship? She's moving...

[Polo2847]

So I'm friends with another girl that I've known her for 2 years, but have talked to her more in our senior year of highschool. We're interested in many things like music, anime, some sports. The reason I didn't confess earlier because I wanted to know more about her. Her personality is a bit more direct, realistic, and practical, while I seem a bit laid back and "slow at realizing things." I've talked to her earlier in the year about where she'll be in the future, and love came up. She mentioned she doesn't want to be in a relationship. Although I've recognized some flaws about her, I can't imagine a world without her. She introduced me to many new things about her culture/country (japan). She's going off to university in Japan on July 16, but I'm going on a family vacation from the 7/9-14. So..I technically have about 8 days to see her. That was some background info.

My question is, what good will it do me if I confessed to her that I liked her? Even if I did it in a casual way? Would it destroy our friendship, since I'm putting love in the middle, and love is not JUST friends, it's MORE THAN friends.
We are both going to college this fall, and I would like to start off fresh, not lingering onto any feelings. If I tell her and she says no she doesn't feel the same way, the feelings end there. Done.
BUT if she does feel the same way, what now? She's in Japan, I'm in the west coast USA, 2 completely different time zones. I dont want my grades in college to worsen because of thinking about her, and avoiding other girls (potential partners) that are actually here, in my college, where I can see them every day. I don't want her grades to worsen by having her think about me all the time either.

Should I just casually tell her my feelings? Would it destroy anything? I dont want it to...I just feel pain when I think about my feelings towards her, yet I feel happy when I hang out with her as friends.

[Cheesydog567]

It can go either way if she doesn't requite your love. It'll either be that she wants to be friends or she never wants to see you again. I had a similar situation where I knew a girl for about two years and was crazy about her. Over the last couple of weeks I thought she felt the same. So anyway I told her and she didn't feel the same but she is taking some time to think about if she wants to be friends, I don't regret telling her though

[blair_waldorf]

So I'm friends with another girl that I've known her for 2 years, but have talked to her more in our senior year of highschool. We're interested in many things like music, anime, some sports. The reason I didn't confess earlier because I wanted to know more about her. Her personality is a bit more direct, realistic, and practical, while I seem a bit laid back and "slow at realizing things." I've talked to her earlier in the year about where she'll be in the future, and love came up. She mentioned she doesn't want to be in a relationship. Although I've recognized some flaws about her, I can't imagine a world without her. She introduced me to many new things about her culture/country (japan). She's going off to university in Japan on July 16, but I'm going on a family vacation from the 7/9-14. So..I technically have about 8 days to see her. That was some background info.

My question is, what good will it do me if I confessed to her that I liked her? Even if I did it in a casual way? Would it destroy our friendship, since I'm putting love in the middle, and love is not JUST friends, it's MORE THAN friends.
We are both going to college this fall, and I would like to start off fresh, not lingering onto any feelings. If I tell her and she says no she doesn't feel the same way, the feelings end there. Done.
BUT if she does feel the same way, what now? She's in Japan, I'm in the west coast USA, 2 completely different time zones. I dont want my grades in college to worsen because of thinking about her, and avoiding other girls (potential partners) that are actually here, in my college, where I can see them every day. I don't want her grades to worsen by having her think about me all the time either.

Should I just casually tell her my feelings? Would it destroy anything? I dont want it to...I just feel pain when I think about my feelings towards her, yet I feel happy when I hang out with her as friends.


OBviously, don't tell her. I know it might be hard, but since she isn't looking for a relationship, that's already enough to tell you that you shouldn't tell her. Also, since she said she wasn't looking for a relationship, the most probable answer you would get would be a no. That being said, once you hear that no, you will probably be devastated and not have fun all summer, or in college.
I suggest cherishing the time you have together, being the best friend you could possibly be, and if she comes around, that's great. Because as soon as you tell her, you have just ruined your friendship in one way or another. Things will never be the same. If she likes you too, but you break up, you'll never have that friendship with her again, or it would be a very awkward friendship. If she says no, it will be an even more awkward friendship!

[SillyShyGuy]

It is better to be honest. If she is a true friend, then your friendship will not suffer.