What to do regarding relationships is you're really unattractive?

[eugaurie]

Basically I feel like the reason I can't have any relationship at the moment is because of my physical appearance, and rather than simply saying "if they can't accept it, don't date them." can anyone give any practical advice, thanks. :D

[carolinae]

I think you just have to have a cool/good personality. Be a nice person. Also, maybe dress nicely and stay clean if you don't. No one wants to be next to a slob. But really, most people don't really care for physical appearance; after people realize how cool you are and like you, you'll become the most beautiful person in their eyes.

[Karkat]

I think you just have to have a cool/good personality. Be a nice person. Also, maybe dress nicely and stay clean if you don't. No one wants to be next to a slob. But really, most people don't really care for physical appearance; after people realize how cool you are and like you, you'll become the most beautiful person in their eyes.

Exactly.

Tbh, neither my boyfriend nor I are the most conventionally attractive people, but we love each other, and we think the other looks hot, so that's all that really matters.

Attractiveness is pretty darn subjective to begin with, honestly.

[TheN3rdyOutcast]

My opinion is that if you're a good person with a good heart then you'll find someone that will date you.

[hipster101]

Honestly...
The reason you're not getting a date is not because you're not physically attractive, it is because no one is taking the time to truly get to know you. Looks don't matter to me, and if everyone were to overlook that I think we'd find we have a lot more in common and could get along better than if first appearances made a difference.

[BuryYourFlame]

I'm going to cut what everyone else has said because all that's true and doesn't really need to be repeated. I will say though that 'really unattractive' can be because of just a couple of things that are pretty easy to change, not necessarily because you are a 'really unattractive' person. The main example of this would be hair cuts, they can change the way people see your face incredibly by highlighting different features depending on the hair cut. Clothing also comes in to this a lot, good style (not necessarily expensive) will highlight more attractive features about your face and body.

That being said...by all means go outside of your comfort zone, that's the only way we learn, but don't go sticking with a style that you don't like and pretending to be someone you're not. Find a style that works for you and if you like it, stick with it.

[xzachx]

All of what has been said is true. i dont know if this has been mentioned yet, but one word. "Confidence." Whenever i have asked for advice all the person kept saying was, be nice, smile, and act/have confidence. I can say im also not the most attractive guy out there, but even the most "unattractive" guys can be seen as amazing if they have confidence.

[eugaurie]

What would say is the best thing to build confidence?
I think its kind of difficult if I don't have that many opportunities to do so.

[unknownuser]

First off, anyone judging you based on your appearance alone is very shallow and probably doesn't deserve to be with you in the first place, but good outward looks do make a good first impression ~ so it never hurts to look neat and composed. Just remember to be yourself and not force yourself to change for anyone if you don't want to. :)

This is coming from someone who once had terrible self confidence. I never had pretty hair and nails like all the popular girls, I never had the latest and greatest name-brand clothes. Before, especially in the junior high - early high school years, I did care, I did want to fit in and have friends. I was really self-conscious and hated myself for not being nice, but once you get older, you learn to care less and accept yourself because you realize how stupid the pressure was to look all nice and pretty. It really helps to experiment around with your clothing and appearance until you find something that really suits you. Something as simple as a new haircut, new glasses really can help,keeping your hair, teeth, and nails neat and clean, finding a new perfume that you really like, altering your style to find something that fits and flatters you.

[SillyShyGuy]

If a girl truly likes you, she will see passed your imperfections. Looks should only be a bonus. No girl should judge a guy based on his looks, and guys should not judge girls based on looks. She should like you for who you are first. The right girl will come along if you are yourself.

[CrazyPerson101]

I maynot be the most attractive person in the world but I do have a little confidence in me ( It took me forever to get that little bit, you have to believe in yourself, & if hopefully when I find the person I will be with, I want them to love me for me and not just my physical appearance cause lets face it, Im not as attractive as other guys and I will do the same to said person whoever they maybe, Ill know it when I meet them ( same as you will want am I right ? :) )

[flaaffy]

Attraction has a surprisingly small amount to do with looks. I don't consider myself conventionally pretty, but just the same, I've had my share of guys like me..it's mostly based on personality and confidence. Like, this one guy that I've liked for a looong time isn't conventionally attractive at all, if I look at him objectively- he's kind of short and skinny and he's awful at wearing clothes that match- but I think he's adorable. It's all based on perspective.

[Uranus]

I maynot be the most attractive person in the world but I do have a little confidence in me ( It took me forever to get that little bit, you have to believe in yourself, & if hopefully when I find the person I will be with, I want them to love me for me and not just my physical appearance cause lets face it, Im not as attractive as other guys and I will do the same to said person whoever they maybe, Ill know it when I meet them ( same as you will want am I right ? :) )

Same here. I'm not the best looking...but I also have confidence in me. The reason I guess I didn't have confidence, is because whereever I loooked I always saw a guy who was always better looking. I may not have the best body with a six pck and a v-line. But ever since I became more social(I used to live in the country and was homeschooled) I had more confidence in me. I have grown a lot in confidence! I hang out with girls when I get a chance and they actually like me(as friends....I'm in a relationship tho) and I have gottien a lot of confidence. Don't try and be someone you ain't. Be yourself, and if they judge you before they get to know you(and I'm sure your a cool guy) then they don't know what they're missing. Just be yourself man.

[CrazyPerson101]

Same here. I'm not the best looking...but I also have confidence in me. The reason I guess I didn't have confidence, is because whereever I loooked I always saw a guy who was always better looking. I may not have the best body with a six pck and a v-line. But ever since I became more social(I used to live in the country and was homeschooled) I had more confidence in me. I have grown a lot in confidence! I hang out with girls when I get a chance and they actually like me(as friends....I'm in a relationship tho) and I have gottien a lot of confidence. Don't try and be someone you ain't. Be yourself, and if they judge you before they get to know you(and I'm sure your a cool guy) then they don't know what they're missing. Just be yourself man.


Well I've changed a bit but I still try to be myself for the most part.... but I see what you're saying and I agree with ya 100%

[brybrymanc]

I think you are pretty hot, I'd play on the whole Harry Styles look you have going on, very nice xxx