No idea what to do about my LD girlfriend

[jombo]

So we've been friends since late August last year. April 9th this year we decided to date, and have been up until then. We masturbate together (in calls and via typing) and also send each other naked photos occasionally. I love this girl so much. I speak to her every day for at least 6 hours (because she's 7 hours ahead) but my mother isn't exactly for it. She doesn't trust how she's from the Philippines seeing as the girls there have a bad reputation for using guys. She is also 19. I'm only 16. My mother is suspicious of why she'd want that with me. She didn't show me herself naked straight away. She was worried to. She also apparently has never had a boyfriend, but I don't know if she's telling the truth. She'll be moving to within 500 miles of me (6000 atm) next year. November at the earliest. So there IS potential, but I just worry about my mother being right and me wasting my time. I met her on Twitter, and I follow her online friends (and vice versa) and also she doesn't need me for a visa apparently as she's at a certain UNI and it's easy to get, plus she's never asked me for money. What do I do? No use speaking to my mother about this.

[sixguy6]

Seems legit and wait and you'll get her :). Hope it goes well and good luck!! I love these things. Keep me posted :)

[StacyD]

That's a tough one. Even when she moves closer, 500 miles is still long distance in my book. Better than 6000, I know, but still.

Of course, distance is all kind of unimportant if you don't really have a foundation anyway. Only you know the answer to whether a girl you've only recently met (online), who currently lives half a world away from you, who you've never met in person, is something which truly qualifies as a meaningful, solid "relationship" or "girlfriend" atm. Regardless of the issue of your mother, I would focus time and energy on finding and building a relationship with someone close to you, in person.

Good luck with this.

[LifeOfLove]

Honestly, at 500 miles away, you won't notice much of a difference between that and 6,000. My boyfriend and I were about 200 miles away from eachother for a while, and even that, something you could actually drive to and from and still have most of the day meant we never saw eachother. 500 miles would have literally meant never saw eachother. 500 miles basically is still going to mean a plane ticket, or a 9+ hour drive each way, and it doesn't sound like your mother is the type to let you stay at her place if you make the drive to see her.

It's always a tough call on these, but if it were me personally I'd have some fun with it while I can but keep my options open. Again, I don't think you'll notice a difference between 6,000 miles and 500 miles. Even if you do, I can say from first hand experience, 200 miles is pretty darn rough.

[StacyD]

Honestly, at 500 miles away, you won't notice much of a difference between that and 6,000. My boyfriend and I were about 200 miles away from eachother for a while, and even that, something you could actually drive to and from and still have most of the day meant we never saw eachother. 500 miles would have literally meant never saw eachother. 500 miles basically is still going to mean a plane ticket, or a 9+ hour drive each way, and it doesn't sound like your mother is the type to let you stay at her place if you make the drive to see her.

It's always a tough call on these, but if it were me personally I'd have some fun with it while I can but keep my options open. Again, I don't think you'll notice a difference between 6,000 miles and 500 miles. Even if you do, I can say from first hand experience, 200 miles is pretty darn rough.

Well said too and nicely put.

[Body odah Man]

So we've been friends since late August last year. April 9th this year we decided to date, and have been up until then. We masturbate together (in calls and via typing) and also send each other naked photos occasionally. I love this girl so much. I speak to her every day for at least 6 hours (because she's 7 hours ahead) but my mother isn't exactly for it. She doesn't trust how she's from the Philippines seeing as the girls there have a bad reputation for using guys. She is also 19. I'm only 16. My mother is suspicious of why she'd want that with me. She didn't show me herself naked straight away. She was worried to. She also apparently has never had a boyfriend, but I don't know if she's telling the truth. She'll be moving to within 500 miles of me (6000 atm) next year. November at the earliest. So there IS potential, but I just worry about my mother being right and me wasting my time. I met her on Twitter, and I follow her online friends (and vice versa) and also she doesn't need me for a visa apparently as she's at a certain UNI and it's easy to get, plus she's never asked me for money. What do I do? No use speaking to my mother about this.

I think you should STOP masturbating together. That's fuckin disgusting man. Also, ignore your mother. You gotta have some trust and if you love this woman it'll work out in the end. Trust. Believe, live

[jombo]

I think you should STOP masturbating together. That's fuckin disgusting man. Also, ignore your mother. You gotta have some trust and if you love this woman it'll work out in the end. Trust. Believe, live
Is sex disgusting too? :s It's no different than sex.

[Body odah Man]

Is sex disgusting too? :s It's no different than sex.

Sex isn't disgusting, no. Just...I dunno why, but masturbating together just kinda does feel disgusting IMO. Masturbation is more a solo private thing.

[Blood]

I think you should STOP masturbating together. That's fuckin disgusting man. Also, ignore your mother. You gotta have some trust and if you love this woman it'll work out in the end. Trust. Believe, live

Sex isn't disgusting, no. Just...I dunno why, but masturbating together just kinda does feel disgusting IMO. Masturbation is more a solo private thing.

Don't tell him what to do with his SO sexually. If they masturbate together there's nothing wrong with that. It isn't disgusting; it's harmless and for some people it can serve as a good way to bond sexually, emotionally, and mentally through the distance. Masturbation is what you make it. It can be solo or mutual.

I don't really have any advice for you, OP, but I hope everything works out for you in the long run.

[Remora]

Don't tell him what to do with his SO sexually. If they masturbate together there's nothing wrong with that. It isn't disgusting; it's harmless and for some people it can serve as a good way to bond sexually, emotionally, and mentally through the distance. Masturbation is what you make it. It can be solo or mutual.

I've gotta agree on Blood with this (have i ever disagreed with her? No. But that's irrelevant), i don't see what's wrong with it whatsoever and i think a bunch of people would agree. It's something they decide to do together and it's a good way of bonding when you can't do anything else.

[Meganium]

My only issue is the picture exchange. I don't care who it is or how much you know them, it's almost never a good idea to send pictures of yourself nude. And honestly, with a person in an LDR, you have even less of a clue what she'll do with them should she start acting less than friendly for some reason.

Otherwise, I'd say you're in good shape.

[jombo]

My only issue is the picture exchange. I don't care who it is or how much you know them, it's almost never a good idea to send pictures of yourself nude. And honestly, with a person in an LDR, you have even less of a clue what she'll do with them should she start acting less than friendly for some reason.

Otherwise, I'd say you're in good shape.

I don't think it's bad considering she has sent me some of her too. If she did anything I can return the favour.

[SkootuGurl]

I don't think it's bad considering she has sent me some of her too. If she did anything I can return the favour.

It IS bad for you, since you could potentially be charged with transmitting underage pornography and be put on a sex offenders list.

[Sarah18]

Being cautious is the most important thing you can do, that goes for long distance relationships AND closed distance relationships. You can never REALLY know a person and according to studies it takes approximately 18 months to get to know someone. Your mother is only doing her job and protecting you. Yes we all want to be "Grown ups and strong and independent and do things for ourselves and make our own decisions", well you need to learn that you're not 18 yet, and your mother is still responsible. She doesn't have to like what you're doing, and even when you're 18 she still might not like what you're doing, but until then you have to respect her wishes. The best thing you can do is TALK TO YOUR MOTHER. Let her know how you feel. You can't argue with her, otherwise she will never accept your feelings for this girl. You have to introduce her to your mother slowly and show that you both care about each other (if you really do)... 500 miles is still quite a distance, but it will certainly make it much easier to possibly meet.

Also, you need to stop with the sexting stuff... once she is in this country, if you were to get caught you and her both can be charged with intent to lure a minor, along with a whole other panel of charges dealing with child pornography and endangerment, which could get her sent back to her own country and you will never be allowed to speak to her again. So if you want trust from your mother and for this relationship to work out, you need to learn about the risks and consequences and talk to your mother and this girl.

[jombo]

It IS bad for you, since you could potentially be charged with transmitting underage pornography and be put on a sex offenders list.

16 is legal.

[Meganium]

16 is legal.

That doesn't apply to pornography, only the act of sexual intercourse. You can both still be charged.

[Sarah18]

16 is legal.

16 is not "legal"... 18 is legal, 16 is age of consent, and that still may vary depending on state.