xlBitterSweetlx
June 19th, 2014, 11:40 AM
It's me again. Twice in a day, I know. But I just can't get this off my mind.
One of my best friends and I have been friends for years.
We've always been different, but we somehow fit each other. She helped me open up,
we have fun together and we are even writing a trilogy together.
Up to a point.
We chat almost everyday for about an hour, and one ay I just opened my eyes and noticed how 55 minutes of this hour are spent planning the book. I felt like our friendship lied only on this. We discussed it and decided to talk about other things for a while.
I forgot to mention that after elementary school we went to different highschools. I found new friends and introduced her to them, and we became a group.
And lately I've been finding myself avoiding being just with her.
And today, as I was thinking, I figured out why.
We have become even more different than before.
Here are some things that made me think this way:
-Her 'wanting to try everything', including cigarettes (check) and weed; even smoked for the first time with one of my new friends, who is a good girl but way too curious + thank God she only did it twice
-She likes acting superior, bragging about her new expensive clothes, complaimimg abojt her obviously amazing figure, face, and how she is BORED of the FIVE skirts she has
-She has this thing, everytime we go out, there's that secret 'look of judgement' all over me (especially since she started using makeup)
-Her idea of fun being going to a villa with her classmates for 2 days and getting drunk, whereas my class going out for a nice meal and just hanging out is 'not cool'; Not to memtoon she is planning to celebrate her birthday in a night club which opens late, obviously, and YES she is 16, NO I'm not going.
-She always HAS to be right and may be direct up to rude
Yes, I know - a true friend accepts you for who you are.
I'm not saying I am perfect, nor that I do not accept her.
It's just that sometimes she makes it feel like an obligation to be with her. Like tomorrow, she invited me over for a short time as it is a 2nd shift day at school and she'll be travelling for a while in the summer. And I've been so exhausted lately, and this is my chance to rest - and when I said that I may not come if I don't wake up on time, she got mad. She might not be superangry, I don't know, but she hasn't written to me yet. And even if I may sound rude, I just can't help but feel forced in this.
What should I do? Not about the invitation (I may not have one), but overally in this situation...
One of my best friends and I have been friends for years.
We've always been different, but we somehow fit each other. She helped me open up,
we have fun together and we are even writing a trilogy together.
Up to a point.
We chat almost everyday for about an hour, and one ay I just opened my eyes and noticed how 55 minutes of this hour are spent planning the book. I felt like our friendship lied only on this. We discussed it and decided to talk about other things for a while.
I forgot to mention that after elementary school we went to different highschools. I found new friends and introduced her to them, and we became a group.
And lately I've been finding myself avoiding being just with her.
And today, as I was thinking, I figured out why.
We have become even more different than before.
Here are some things that made me think this way:
-Her 'wanting to try everything', including cigarettes (check) and weed; even smoked for the first time with one of my new friends, who is a good girl but way too curious + thank God she only did it twice
-She likes acting superior, bragging about her new expensive clothes, complaimimg abojt her obviously amazing figure, face, and how she is BORED of the FIVE skirts she has
-She has this thing, everytime we go out, there's that secret 'look of judgement' all over me (especially since she started using makeup)
-Her idea of fun being going to a villa with her classmates for 2 days and getting drunk, whereas my class going out for a nice meal and just hanging out is 'not cool'; Not to memtoon she is planning to celebrate her birthday in a night club which opens late, obviously, and YES she is 16, NO I'm not going.
-She always HAS to be right and may be direct up to rude
Yes, I know - a true friend accepts you for who you are.
I'm not saying I am perfect, nor that I do not accept her.
It's just that sometimes she makes it feel like an obligation to be with her. Like tomorrow, she invited me over for a short time as it is a 2nd shift day at school and she'll be travelling for a while in the summer. And I've been so exhausted lately, and this is my chance to rest - and when I said that I may not come if I don't wake up on time, she got mad. She might not be superangry, I don't know, but she hasn't written to me yet. And even if I may sound rude, I just can't help but feel forced in this.
What should I do? Not about the invitation (I may not have one), but overally in this situation...