Breaking point

[JustSomeone]

I was diagnosed with bipolar disorder, along with anxiety and depression, two years ago. I started taking medicine, and everything was okay for a while. Everyone thought I was okay, I thought I was okay too. A few weeks ago, I started feeling like I was being sucked into a black hole, and I knew things were going back to the way they were. The bullying started again, and I stopped talking my meds. I haven't told anyone, because I've already put them through so much. I feel like I'm acting for everyone. I'm reaching my breaking point, and I don't know what to do.

[Karkat]

Why did you stop taking your meds, weren't they helping you? I'm not judging- I've both abused my medications and refused to take them in the short period I've been on them...

If you need to vent, we're always here to listen.

[CharlieHorse]

Hey welcome to VT :)
Because you stopped taking your meds, I suggest you start taking them again because they could help you enough for you to get going good and happy again. Also it may be a good idea to talk to your psychiatrist/therapist about this. Even a trusted adult, teacher, counselor, or parent can help.
Just know that the trouble that you're experiencing is not your fault, and it is temporary. I'm sure that your family/friends care about you and want to help you in any way they can with your diagnosis.

[JustSomeone]

Why did you stop taking your meds, weren't they helping you? I'm not judging- I've both abused my medications and refused to take them in the short period I've been on them...

If you need to vent, we're always here to listen.

They were making me crazy. I couldn't take it anymore. I was paranoid and hallucinating. Is there someone I can message or something about this on here?

[gothy]

Hey welcome to VT :)
Because you stopped taking your meds, I suggest you start taking them again because they could help you enough for you to get going good and happy again. Also it may be a good idea to talk to your psychiatrist/therapist about this. Even a trusted adult, teacher, counselor, or parent can help.
Just know that the trouble that you're experiencing is not your fault, and it is temporary. I'm sure that your family/friends care about you and want to help you in any way they can with your diagnosis.

i agree. Take your meds will likely help. If there is a reason you stopped, tell the doctor and they may adjust the dosage or give you a different type.

[Karkat]

They were making me crazy. I couldn't take it anymore. I was paranoid and hallucinating. Is there someone I can message or something about this on here?

Actually, PM (private messaging) isn't an option until you reach 100 posts. I don't remember how many you need to VM (visitor messaging), I think 50.

As far as being helped on here, posting about it is your best bet anyways- none of us are medical professionals.(that I know of, because most members over 18-20 are gone or rarely ever on. Mostly gone. There are like two or three 20/21 year olds that come on. I'm assuming no one here has a degree in psychology by this age.) There are quite a few sufferers of bipolar disorder (myself included), so you're in a good place for that. What are you taking? Are you taking multiple medications?

Edit: OH, I'm so dumb- do you have manic episodes, or just hypomanic? If you have manic episodes, and you feel like you're in the middle of one, the paranoia and hallucinations might be because you're bipolar, and not because you're on medication. ESPECIALLY because you've mentioned you have anxiety as well- I go through psychosis when I have severe panic attacks sometimes, and when I'm having manic episodes as well.

[Leprous]

i agree. Take your meds will likely help. If there is a reason you stopped, tell the doctor and they may adjust the dosage or give you a different type.

I agree with Gothy, you should keep taking your meds, I think what you are feeling may be caused by your bipolar disorder,but I'm no doctor, I suggest seeing your doctor aswell. He/she will tell you what to do with your meds. I hope you'll feel better.

[JustSomeone]

Actually, PM (private messaging) isn't an option until you reach 100 posts. I don't remember how many you need to VM (visitor messaging), I think 50.

As far as being helped on here, posting about it is your best bet anyways- none of us are medical professionals.(that I know of, because most members over 18-20 are gone or rarely ever on. Mostly gone. There are like two or three 20/21 year olds that come on. I'm assuming no one here has a degree in psychology by this age.) There are quite a few sufferers of bipolar disorder (myself included), so you're in a good place for that. What are you taking? Are you taking multiple medications?

I take three different medications. Lithium, Lamictal, and Abilify. Not sure if all three should go together, but my doctor said it was best. I stopped taking them about a week and a half ago.

[Karkat]

I take three different medications. Lithium, Lamictal, and Abilify. Not sure if all three should go together, but my doctor said it was best. I stopped taking them about a week and a half ago.

ABILIFY

Abilify made me paranoid as fuck when I was on it when I was 13. I don't know if it's one of the major side effects, but maybe talk to your doctor about that one? Lithium shouldn't be causing this- if anything, it should be preventing it, and I've never heard of lamictal.

I'll do some research and get back to you.

[JustSomeone]

ABILIFY

Abilify made me paranoid as fuck when I was on it when I was 13. I don't know if it's one of the major side effects, but maybe talk to your doctor about that one? Lithium shouldn't be causing this- if anything, it should be preventing it, and I've never heard of lamictal.

I'll do some research and get back to you.

Thank you so much. This site has already helped me a lot. Do you know if there is any easier way to talk to people my age about this?

[CharlieHorse]

Thank you so much. This site has already helped me a lot. Do you know if there is any easier way to talk to people my age about this?

You mean like friends/peers?

[JustSomeone]

You mean like friends/peers?

None of my friends know what it's like, so they don't know how to help. I was just wondering if there was someplace to talk to someone my age that has been through it or knows how to help.

[CharlieHorse]

None of my friends know what it's like, so they don't know how to help. I was just wondering if there was someplace to talk to someone my age that has been through it or knows how to help.

I bet there's a community youth group in your area for stuff like group therapy. I've tried it before, and it was helpful. :)

But here online? We're all here, kinda. Most of us here, if not all of us, have gone through stuff like this :/. Talk with us :)

[JustSomeone]

I bet there's a community youth group in your area for stuff like group therapy. I've tried it before, and it was helpful. :)

But here online? We're all here, kinda. Most of us here, if not all of us, have gone through stuff like this :/. Talk with us :)

Is there a way to talk to you without everyone seeing every word of the conversation? Thank you for all of your help, by the way.

[CharlieHorse]

Is there a way to talk to you without everyone seeing every word of the conversation? Thank you for all of your help, by the way.

oh yeah there's the Private Messages. Just click on someone's username and select "Send a Private Message to ___".

[Karkat]

oh yeah there's the Private Messages. Just click on someone's username and select "Send a Private Message to ___".

She doesn't have enough posts. You need 100, I'm pretty sure.

[CharlieHorse]

She doesn't have enough posts. You need 100, I'm pretty sure.

what?
dam :/

[Leprous]

Well, you can always post a visitor message, or you can try to contact someone on skype if they are willing togive it. I'm not sure how old you are, but you should maybe look for someone about your age on this post. I'm sure you'll find someone to talk to eventually. :)

[JustSomeone]

I'm 15. Thanks.

[Leprous]

Sry, messing up on thr post edditing here, using my phone (just check the next post)