I need your help.

[LouBerry]

So, a few months ago, one of my sweet students, R.J., was being bullied and had gotten expelled from school for something that wasn't his fault, and one night on an impulse he ran into his grandma's house, picked up a gun, and shot himself in the head.

Last night, One of my really good friends's little sisters, Logan, killed herself. She was having problems at school with her friends being mean to her, and struggling with the dead of a friend, so she drove over to the railroad tracts in her town, and laid down in front of a train.

Two suicides in two months, in our little area is crazy.

R.J. was only 13. Logan was 16. They were so young, and had so much ahead of them. It's such a tragedy that they choose to end their lives rather than seek help.

So, in their memory, I want to start something.

R.J. and Logan shouldn't have had to take their lives, and neither should anyone else, ever. Here in America, the school system does very little to ensure the mental health of it's students. Most schools offer no aid to their students besides pamphlets and sometimes a counselor, and, in rural areas like here especially, people don't talk about suicide. It's like a taboo. They don't talk about it, don't educate students about it, and think the lack of exposure will keep them from doing it. It's past time for that to change.

So, what I need from you is ideas. Most people on this site have struggled with depression/suicidal thoughts, or still do, so tell me, what helps you or what would help? What would you like to see done as a preventative measure in your school?

[Leprous]

Well, here in Belgium bullying is taken more serious, but in my school, the teachers barely do anything untill the victim snaps, and does bad things, only to blame the bullying victim. I think bullies should be dealt with from the start, the teachers should keep an eye out for anything that looks like bullying, and they should go there, and deal with it instantly. I'm also very sorry for your loss, nobody deserves to get bullied.

[LouBerry]

Well, here in Belgium bullying is taken more serious, but in my school, the teachers barely do anything untill the victim snaps, and does bad things, only to blame the bullying victim. I think bullies should be dealt with from the start, the teachers should keep an eye out for anything that looks like bullying, and they should go there, and deal with it instantly. I'm also very sorry for your loss, nobody deserves to get bullied.

Thank you.

I agree, and it's the same way here. In the five years I was in high school, a bully never once even got suspended, even though according the the school handbook bullying is against the law and is therefor punishable by expulsion and legal action.

[Desmond Jones]

Teach self-defense and allow kids to use it without being suspended. In my town, if there is a fight in school, all students will be punished. So despite the fact that two bullies shoved a kid to the ground twice before he bloodied one of their noses, all three received an equal suspension.
That's only the physical side, though.
Mentally, knowing a martial art is a huge confidence builder, even if you're only a white belt.
Just one idea.

[Living For Love]

Martial arts would do the trick as far as physical bullying is concerned, but there's also another type of bullying, the psychological one. I guess what schools really need is good counsellors who can keep the subject anonymous, give advice, and then ask for the school staff to keep an eye on the bullies, but the whole process needs to be made anonymously.

[Karkat]

I know this is going to sound extremely morbid, but only two things consistently help me get through suicidal thoughts: passing out from exhaustion, and failed attempts.

I literally have no resources to get through it, and I'm starting to get scared out of my mind that one of these times I'll actually succeed and kill myself.

I'm not being bullied, I struggle with multiple anxiety disorders, bipolar disorder, substance abuse and addiction, along with a few other things. Understandably, I'm distraught, and understandably, there honestly isn't much anyone can do for me.

HOWEVER

The one thing that helps me RECOVER, after the failed attempts, after the lows, after all the bullshit, is feeling like someone's got my back. Anyone.

Sadly, the two sites that have been recommended to me, I've never had success on, and the two forums (this, and GT) that I'm sorta regularish on aren't...Fast enough. I could be gone before anyone even saw my post.

I wish there was a way for a faster response time on sites like 7 Cups Of Tea, IMAlive, etc. I mean, I get that no response means they're helping LOTS of people who need it, but what happens when I need it? What happens when it's my last resort?

Worst of all, what happens when it's SOMEONE ELSE'S last resort? After all, I've never successfully been able to kill myself, but others have more luck, or at least will screw themselves up for life. I still have the ability to type, clearly. (Though I do have chronic migraines and neck pain from a very close call)

It just bothers me.

[Gumleaf]

That is such a tragedy and I remember you describing how much RJ's death affected you and your town a few months ago. So it must be even worse now. I think there are 2 main types of depression that can lead to suicide in people around our age. The first is that despite loving people around you, that for whatever reason you hate yourself and/or how you see yourself and can't see any way out of it. The other is the result of others hating on you and reaching the point that you believe the hating and can't find a way out of it. The irony is that in many cases, the haters are just as troubled and hate on others to self gratify themselves, and make themselves feel better, which is really sad. Unfortunately I'm not in a stable mindset right now, so to be able to offer meaningful ideas right now would be difficult for me since I can't really figure this all out myself. But clearly more needs to be done.

[Karkat]

That is such a tragedy and I remember you describing how much RJ's death affected you and your town a few months ago. So it must be even worse now. I think there are 2 main types of depression that can lead to suicide in people around our age. The first is that despite loving people around you, that for whatever reason you hate yourself and/or how you see yourself and can't see any way out of it. The other is the result of others hating on you and reaching the point that you believe the hating and can't find a way out of it. The irony is that in many cases, the haters are just as troubled and hate on others to self gratify themselves, and make themselves feel better, which is really sad. Unfortunately I'm not in a stable mindset right now, so to be able to offer meaningful ideas right now would be difficult for me since I can't really figure this all out myself. But clearly more needs to be done.

Sadly, mental health often leads to problems that seem totally indescribable. I feel biased speaking for myself [-]because I literally can't do anything right[/-], but a lot kids, teens, adults that hate themselves have no idea to control it on their own. It's not that they want to hate themselves, per se- it's not that they brought it on themselves, but sometimes, it's inevitable. And I can't think of anything more terrifying or tragic.