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View Full Version : Is she too out of my league?


TheRedViper
June 5th, 2014, 07:54 AM
We've been really good friends for two years now, ever since she came to my school (but she left now). She's very beautiful, and this sometimes makes me worried she is way too good for me. I'm by no means ugly, I'm just not great looking either. I'm pretty average. I'm not saying she just cares about appearance in a relationship, but I don't know.

I think we're very close as friends. We always texted (and still do) each other, and we were pretty much best friends when she was at school. We'll sometimes catch up not during school, like tonight we went to KFC and talked there for like an hour, then went back to her house and just stayed there for a few hours, watching Youtube and TV. She said she was supposed to go see her boyfriend later tonight, but told me she'd rather just stay with me.

She has a boyfriend, who's been on and off for ages now. He treats her pretty badly, even though he is constantly sucking up to her and pretending he loves her whenever she gets pissed off. She always, and I mean always, complains about him and how she hates him and doesn't want to be with him. Just now she texted me (even though we saw each other an hour ago) and said she is breaking up with him finally. This has happened several times though, over the past year and a half.

I honestly think though that we'd be good together. We love being with each other, even if it's just talking and sitting quietly, and she considers me one of her best friends, and trusts me heaps. I know it would make sense to ask her out (or at least see how it goes) if she does in fact break up with her boyfriend. And I really do want to at least ask her. I'm just worried that I'm nowhere near good enough for her. I sometimes feel a bit insecure that I'm too boring for her, since she leads a pretty full-on life, like heaps of parties and stuff.

I don't know, I just feel really conflicted. I really want to ask her out, but I don't want to ruin our friendship if I ask her and she says no (I also don't want her to feel awkward).

Miserabilia
June 5th, 2014, 08:08 AM
There's not really something as out of legaue, I've always thought that.
You either like er or you don't, and she likes you or she doesn't; and if she doesn't she may if you are a good person. If not and she'd only like people for how they look she's not worth it anyway.

ComfortableInChaos
June 5th, 2014, 08:10 AM
Yeah, just wait until they break up for good. It'll look like you're trying to steal her from her boyfriend. Next time when she complains, ask her if she really wants to be with a guy like that forever, meaning is she going to be dealing with his shit any more.

sixguy6
June 5th, 2014, 08:46 PM
Just ask her out man! She probably likes you too! Always works

LoloJones
June 5th, 2014, 10:20 PM
If she was 'out of your league' then why would she rather spend time with you than her boyfriend? One thing though, make sure you don't get caught up if she breaks up with him. This has happened to me before and sometimes they might just ask you out to help them forget about their last relationship. It can get messy. Wait for a while and maybe give her some space but try to be their as a friend. Hope this helps :)

Camazotz
June 5th, 2014, 11:31 PM
If she was 'out of your league' then why would she rather spend time with you than her boyfriend? One thing though, make sure you don't get caught up if she breaks up with him. This has happened to me before and sometimes they might just ask you out to help them forget about their last relationship. It can get messy. Wait for a while and maybe give her some space but try to be their as a friend. Hope this helps :)

^ This.

It'd be rude to ask her out right after a break-up. Make sure to be there for her as a friend to help her get over the ex. When you think she's ready to start dating, then admit your feelings for her. It sounds like you're already in a good situation though OP. Good luck!

Gamma Male
June 6th, 2014, 12:10 AM
^ This.

It'd be rude to ask her out right after a break-up. Make sure to be there for her as a friend to help her get over the ex. When you think she's ready to start dating, then admit your feelings for her. It sounds like you're already in a good situation though OP. Good luck!

Yeah. Go ahead and ask her out, but give her some time first. You don't want it to seem like you're taking advantage of her, or for her to only go out with you to get back at her ex. Just wait until she's ready.

TheRedViper
June 6th, 2014, 02:47 AM
She texted me early this morning (at like 2am) and told me she actually did break up with her boyfriend. When I told her I'm glad she did what made her happy, and that she deserves better than him, she told me she loved me, and said 'good' when I told her I did too. She also asked what I was doing later that day.

I know it's not very good or considerate to ask her out immediately after a breakup, but the problem is she often gets a new boyfriend very quickly after the last one, so if I wait too long I'll probably be too late.

Living For Love
June 6th, 2014, 05:26 PM
She texted me early this morning (at like 2am) and told me she actually did break up with her boyfriend. When I told her I'm glad she did what made her happy, and that she deserves better than him, she told me she loved me, and said 'good' when I told her I did too. She also asked what I was doing later that day.

I know it's not very good or considerate to ask her out immediately after a breakup, but the problem is she often gets a new boyfriend very quickly after the last one, so if I wait too long I'll probably be too late.

If she told you she loves you, then I guess you two have taken a major step in your relationship. Asking someone out doesn't necessarily means you're dating that person, or you're in love with that person, and since you two already did it before when she was still with the other guy, then it won't make much difference. You should go for it, ask her out and keep in touch with her. Be careful, though: if she's a person who changes boyfriends easily, it doesn't mean she won't do the same with you, so make sure she will commit to the relationship before making things official.

canonjourno
June 6th, 2014, 07:51 PM
She's not out of your league...but you are stuck in between two very difficult worlds here. My advice would be to lay it off and just look after her as a friend for the time being until her boyfriend leaves her.
I would wait it out and ask her when she's better with her other half. However this is up to you. Let us know how it all goes!