I want to tell my best friend, but I'm afraid.

[CosmicNoodle]

Well, my names Joe, I'm 16, and I'm gay (my sig may be outdated a little...)

One of the people I trust the most is in my class, we'll call him S, you can probably guess his name.
I trust him more than any other person, he is the one friend who went to the same college as me. Although we are different people in ever manor, I always feel I can trust him. He understands me. He understands what it is to be trusted. And he's very accepting. He likes everyone, no matter orientation, gender, background etc ect.

And I want to come out, to him at least. Tell him the truth. But I'm afraid to do so. I am afraid he would think less of me, think of me differently. I don't know. I have many trust issues.

How do you come out to someone you've known for over half a decade? How do you tell then your not who they thought you where?

[ksdnfkfr]

i'm thinking since you guys are close, he might know anyways. you know like it won't come as a huge shock to him, unless you've been faking being straight to extreme. although it's normal i think to act straight to go along with the other guys. also i think a friend can get upset if they find out something later on, because they feel hurt you didn't trust them enough to tell them earlier. you could start out with just asking him what if questions. what if this what if that, would you still be my friend?

[Brice]

You sound very close with him. True friends have their own sort of love and if he really loves you as only those super close to you can, than you have nothing to worry about. You said he was very accepting, so that added to what I just said, you've got nothing at all to worry about. Although, some guys are only alright with it if you don't have a crush on them. I don't know if he's one of those guys, but if you don't like him in a romantic way, than you may want to say so when you tell him. Good luck!!! Relax!!! Stay positive!!! :)

[Gamma Male]

Well, you could try feeling him out by bringing up gay marriage or something LGBT related first and then see how he responds.

[Dalcourt]

As Ezra said if you are really close he may figured it out himself already that's at least what most of the people I hang out with to so I hardly ever actually come out to someone...they assume I'm gay on their own..
Anyway, do you know what he thinks about homosexuality in general...any talks about it with him before?
For me if I feel like I have to do so I do it casually...just mentioned how I find some guy attractive and things like that till the other person realizes it and asks whether I'm gay.. it's hard to describe, dunno...I just don't like this dramatic confessions where I sit someone down and tell him...it feels like I either want to confess and propose on him or if I have to apologize for something, but maybe that's just me...

Anyway, be yourself, sounds stupid I know...I mean act as you always do around him and I'm sure he accepts it, stay positive...I wish you all the best.

[CosmicNoodle]

As Ezra said if you are really close he may figured it out himself already that's at least what most of the people I hang out with to so I hardly ever actually come out to someone...they assume I'm gay on their own..
Anyway, do you know what he thinks about homosexuality in general...any talks about it with him before?
For me if I feel like I have to do so I do it casually...just mentioned how I find some guy attractive and things like that till the other person realizes it and asks whether I'm gay.. it's hard to describe, dunno...I just don't like this dramatic confessions where I sit someone down and tell him...it feels like I either want to confess and propose on him or if I have to apologize for something, but maybe that's just me...

Anyway, be yourself, sounds stupid I know...I mean act as you always do around him and I'm sure he accepts it, stay positive...I wish you all the best.

That's what I was thinking of doing, causaly mentioning that some random guy has a nice ass or that I find so and whoever attractive.
I tried the hole "sit the down and tell them with another friend. It just felt awkward...

All I have to do now is work out when to do it, and get the courage up to do it...

[Dalcourt]

All I have to do now is work out when to do it, and get the courage up to do it...

Yep, that's the hardest part, but I'm sure you'll make it.

[NickCollins]

crack a joke get him laughing and comfortable and just "let it go" if he's a good friend he'll understand and be comfortable with it

[dame]

I just recently came out, I told my best friend yesterday & my other best friends today. I was so scared to tell them, I kept procrastinating then I finally had the confidence to do it. They all took it very well, every single one of them was beyond happy for me & we continued on with our normal conversations later as if nothing has changed. Just tell him that you want to talk to him & be straight up with him. If he really cares about you then nothing should change, sexuality is nothing in the grande scheme of things. You will feel so much better once you tell him, trust me. I didn't have the confidence to come out until I talked to someone on VT.

[CosmicNoodle]

I just recently came out, I told my best friend yesterday & my other best friends today. I was so scared to tell them, I kept procrastinating then I finally had the confidence to do it. They all took it very well, every single one of them was beyond happy for me & we continued on with our normal conversations later as if nothing has changed. Just tell him that you want to talk to him & be straight up with him. If he really cares about you then nothing should change, sexuality is nothing in the grande scheme of things. You will feel so much better once you tell him, trust me. I didn't have the confidence to come out until I talked to someone on VT.


Really happy for you man :) Glad you where brave enough to tell them. :)

[Faolan]

Sometimes you just have to pull the bandaid off. Seeing as he's a really good friend of yours who seems pretty accepting, I'd be extremely surprised if he thought any less of you for being gay. Chances are he won't care one way or another, or, alternatively, he already knows. When I came out, it was no surprise to anyone, which is both awkward and relieving. Good luck.

[HazwoldTheElder]

When I did it I just walked up to my friends and said "y'know what guys, I've been thinking, and I've come to the conclusion that I'm bi (gay in your case)" You could just face it head on like I did or work your way to it, talk to him about gay-marriage or homophobia and say that it's an issue for you specifically because you're gay, for example.

[CrazyPerson101]

Well, my names Joe, I'm 16, and I'm gay (my sig may be outdated a little...)

One of the people I trust the most is in my class, we'll call him S, you can probably guess his name.
I trust him more than any other person, he is the one friend who went to the same college as me. Although we are different people in ever manor, I always feel I can trust him. He understands me. He understands what it is to be trusted. And he's very accepting. He likes everyone, no matter orientation, gender, background etc ect.

And I want to come out, to him at least. Tell him the truth. But I'm afraid to do so. I am afraid he would think less of me, think of me differently. I don't know. I have many trust issues.

How do you come out to someone you've known for over half a decade? How do you tell then your not who they thought you where?

i'm thinking since you guys are close, he might know anyways. you know like it won't come as a huge shock to him, unless you've been faking being straight to extreme. although it's normal i think to act straight to go along with the other guys. also i think a friend can get upset if they find out something later on, because they feel hurt you didn't trust them enough to tell them earlier. you could start out with just asking him what if questions. what if this what if that, would you still be my friend?


I agree with Ezra all the way :)