Do I have any say if my parents divorce?

[Sour]

Hi all, my parents have been arguing pretty much every night, and my mum is really starting to piss me off because she's really rude, arrogant and selfish, and she argues about anything and everything. I've overheard them talking about divorce, and my mum is trying to force my dad out of the house. I really don't want to live with my mum, I'd much rather live with my dad, so if a divorce were to happen, who would get the house, and would I have a say in who I lived with? I'd pretty much have to live with my mum if she got the house, because it's really close to school, and one of my best friends lives really close to me and I'm afraid that our friendship would fall apart if I were to move away. Thanks!

(P.S. Is this the right section for this?)

[Horatio Nelson]

I would think yes. Legally though, I'm not sure. You should be able to talk to your parents and tell them how you feel. I hope everything works out for you.

(I believe this is the right section.)

[JamesSuperBoy]

I think at 15 you would have some choice or say - not sure about the house sorry but maybe can you talk to your Dad about all this - its not right if you are worried.

[Sour]

I'm not especially worried, this has been going on for about two years now, so I'm guessing they're going to pussyfoot around it until I finish my exams and stuff.

[Troy35216]

if your mom kept the house how do you know your dad would live where you would have to change schools? maybe he will find a place in the same school district. maybe no one gets the house. the judge might say sell it and split the money. you can tell the divorce judge who you want to live with but idk how much weight that carries. these are questions for lawyers

[JamesSuperBoy]

I'm not especially worried, this has been going on for about two years now, so I'm guessing they're going to pussyfoot around it until I finish my exams and stuff.

I dont think you should be in the position of having to guess - can you talk to your Dad just so at least you know.

[Camazotz]

I dont think you should be in the position of having to guess - can you talk to your Dad just so at least you know.

I agree with this. You shouldn't have to worry about any of this, other than making it known your preferences if they do decide to get a divorce. It's better to ask about it now and try to keep an open line of communication if they go through with it.

[Luminous]

Though I think legally you don't really have any say, as you're 15 your parents will probably take that into consideration. However, if the judge gives custody to only parent, that would be where you live. If there is join custody you could have a room at both of your parents' places. I think it depends on the situation. Best of luck. If you need to talk, I'm always here.

[HSJock206]

Hey Dude..My parents are in the same situation. My mom is always gone working or out of town for some reason and when she is at home she never wants to do anything as a family leaving me and my brothers to fend for ourselves and our Dad. I have heard trial separation and all but hasn't happened yet. If they do go through with a divorce they should take into account your feeling and how its going to effect you and limit the fallout. Your old enough to voice an opinion if it comes down to it. your school counselor can also put you in touch with someone to help talk you through it. Just dont let it get you down and just concentrate on your school and your goals. Hit me up if you ever want to talk about it. Im going through the same thing. Good luck.

[Living For Love]

I think it depends on the situation and how the judge considers it, but they will definitely take your opinion into account. You need to find a balance between either living with your mum and bear with her behaviour or move with your dad and possibly put the friendship you have with that person at stake. Maybe your mum's behaviour will change after she's divorced, but I guess that, whoever you start to live with, the other parent must send money to help the other one with school and food expenses.

[Miserabilia]

You should have a say in with who you want to stay, I'm not saying you always do, butany reasonable parents should let you have a say in it, otherwise you could contact someone else about it or perhaps even legal consequences, etc.

[Fanta_Lover44]

Well if you don't have a choice where you want to live, then why don't you talk to both parents about it to hopefully sort something out.

[Cognizant]

My parents split back in 2012. As much as I would love to say I got a say in how things went and everything was dandy, the only time I got my say was when I stated I want to stay with dad and that was just an informal conversation between my mom and I. I wasn't invited to any of the court sessions.

I kind of came to a realization half way through the mess that if my parents are unhappy with each other, I see no point in making them stay together and be unhappy. Trust me, I was not happy with either of my parents for all of this. In fact, I was mad at both of them for a solid 6 months. Sure, it made my 10 year old sister confused and scarred my 14 year old sister for life, but in the long run everyone is a bit better off with the lasting peace - well, it's more peaceful between everyone compared to before my parents split.

I'm kind of glad I spoke up and my mom moved out by herself, because if my mom got custody (and my dad probably would've killed himself), I would currently either be homeless, in a different location, or have been transferred to my grandparents.