Am I bi cuz my dad wasn't around?

[Nick M]

Ok so my dad worked as a pizza man from 9 am - 11 pm and I was already sleeping by the time he got home and he only had 1 day off every week and it was on a school day. Then when I was 10, he went to jail, which he's still there. I also lost all my friends in school around that age cuz of bullying. I always liked girls up until that year when my dad went away. Now slowly I like boys more and more so now I actually like them more than girls. Could I be bi/gay cuz my dad was never around so I'm subconsciously trying to replace him with another guy in my life? What do u think?

[Living For Love]

The theory that boys who have lost their dads while still young might "turn" gay in the future is not proved yet, and to be honest, I think you would eventually find out you were bi even if you're dad was around. Maybe that just made you realise you were bisexual a bit sooner, but having your sexuality changed just because you're dad wasn't present on a daily basis, it doesn't seem likely to me.

[centropede]

Maybe, because im gay and by dad and mom broked when i started to go in school, and im not living with dad

[Body odah Man]

Ok so my dad worked as a pizza man from 9 am - 11 pm and I was already sleeping by the time he got home and he only had 1 day off every week and it was on a school day. Then when I was 10, he went to jail, which he's still there. I also lost all my friends in school around that age cuz of bullying. I always liked girls up until that year when my dad went away. Now slowly I like boys more and more so now I actually like them more than girls. Could I be bi/gay cuz my dad was never around so I'm subconsciously trying to replace him with another guy in my life? What do u think?

I think that's bullshit. You're either born gay or not at all I believe. Nor do I think that a lack of a father or a male authority figure can cause one to become gay

[Alex_3869]

Yeah I don't think the lack of a male authoritative figure has anything to do with your sexuality. I'm pretty sure you would have found out that you were gay or bi even if your father was around. I mean, you didn't really know about all that sexual stuff at the age of 10 so you probably didn't understand it

[ksdnfkfr]

My dad and I have near perfect father and son relationship. And my bf has a good relationship with his dad as well far as I know.

[backjruton]

I've always liked my dad more than I like my mum, but I think thats more because she can be a grumpy cow and all he does is bug me for my old phone whenever I buy a new one. I'm trying to sell my old phone to him for £50 so I can buy skullcandy aviators on amazon... :lol: I've just found it easier to talk to guys all the time, and the fact I'm always with my brother and I talk to my dad a lot more than my mum could be a big part of that. It could be... but I don't know for sure. My friend basically confirmed my homosexuality for me, because of how I feel even when I'm talking to him compared to when I'm talking to my actual best friend (that's a girl)... there's a very big difference in how I feel there but other than that I'm not too sure

[Plasma]

Ok so my dad worked as a pizza man from 9 am - 11 pm and I was already sleeping by the time he got home and he only had 1 day off every week and it was on a school day. Then when I was 10, he went to jail, which he's still there. I also lost all my friends in school around that age cuz of bullying. I always liked girls up until that year when my dad went away. Now slowly I like boys more and more so now I actually like them more than girls. Could I be bi/gay cuz my dad was never around so I'm subconsciously trying to replace him with another guy in my life? What do u think?

My dad left before I was able to meet him, and I still haven't. I'm completely straight. I don't think that's a very valid theory.

[Andrew2499]

My dad is around and im bi. And he doesnt really agree with gays at all. So i dont think it has influenced me at all. but idk it could be different with you.

[Dalcourt]

Well, I personally believe that all people are bi anyway but that's another thing. I grew up partly in a foster family with both parents present...and partly with only my Dad around...I've never met my biological mother....I'm mostly surrounded by males and I'm gay...so seriously an absent father doesn't have anything to do in my opinion.

[TapDancer]

I don't think the theory that lack of male figures influences sexuality. Frankly, I think it is a little insulting to be honest. But anyway, but dad passed away when I was 9, but I think sub-consciously, I always knew I was gay. I remember being so interested in the mens swimming olympics when they were here as a small child (Sydney, 2000). My brother who is almost 13, is straight, or at least he does not show any homosexual tenancies, and in our family, he knows we would love him either way.

[Bolwing]

The connection between the absence/behaviour of any parent and sexual orientation hasn't been proven.

Both my parents aren't absent or abusive in any way, and yet I am gay. And my older brother is straight.

I see no connection.

[Matt_97]

It is a common belief that the absence of a parent could further determine a child's later sexual orientation. It has not been proven. It has been theorised, even being mentioned by Freud. Again this is a huge debate as to whether sexual orientation is something which is socially learnt or developed or if it is a natural thing that is present even at birth. I personally believe that it is something which you are born with, not something which can be socially manipulated.

So basically in summary, i think that even if your dad was around you'd still be bi because it's who you are, not what society has moulded you to be.

[sqishy]

I don't think that they are related in any way close to the point of the parent not being there causing your sexuality to change, I agree with most of everyone else above.

[Babs]

a lot of people say that boys turn gay because of a lack of a father figure. these people have diarrhea of the mouth.
i think it's fair for me to assume that people say this because withou a father figure, there's no one to teach the boy to be manly. not only does it stereotype gay people as feminine girly-men, which isn't always true, it limits men to the expectation that they have to be 100% masculine and macho, or risk being called gay, as if it were an insult. men and women can be masculine, feminine or androgynous and that has nothing to do with your sexual orientation.
your sexual orientation has nothing to do with your father.

[LiamC]

I love this quote I've seen banded about on the internet:

"I'm not gay because I lack a strong male figure, I'm gay because I want a strong male figure inside me" :lol:


You're bi because you like both boys and girls. That's it.

[Aidoon123]

You were born the way you were born, so your parents have no influence on your sexuality :P

[Etcetera]

At my school, we are required to do a senior project in order to graduate. I did mine on "The Fatherless Generation" and it was focused on the effects that growing up without a dad could have on a child even as an adult.

Statistics do show that the effects of not having a dad can be huge on a child, and yes, research does suggest that it could cause a child to become homosexual/bisexual, simply because the child is left searching for love in all the 'wrong' places.

I in no way am saying that I think that if you don't have a dad and you are homosexual or bisexual that it is because you didn't have a dad. I am stating what the research from my project suggested. I have more as well.