Triggers

[Karkat]

(Wow I post way too many threads in here, I should really talk to my therapist about r.e.h.a.b.i.l.i.t.a.t.i.o.n [Of course I'm kidding, it's too expensive, and it wouldn't do me any good at this point. I'm clean, I'm just a junkie. :rolleyes: ] )

(Anyways) I just got done watching the movie Trainspotting. Those of you who have watched it know exactly why I am mentioning it. Those of you who haven't, it's entirely about drugs. Heroin, to be exact- which thankfully I haven't gotten into, because I'd most likely be dead, or in way too bad of shape to do anything as productive as I do here (you call this productive, Ren?). However, there is a LOT dealing with shooting up, getting high, withdrawals, smoking, drinking, etc.

Basically it's like one giant punch to the face for me. I went from watching Jumpin' Jack Flash (Much milder. Comedy thriller. Spy stuff. No drugs.) and feeling pretty good, to watching Trainspotting and feeling miserable.

I mean, I'm cheerful enough, but I'm craving EVERYTHING. I need a drink. I need a smoke. Heck, I'd take some fucking pseudoephedrine right now- and that's literally meth without any of the euphoric effects. You feel like you're going to DIE. But I want it.

Yeah, drugs really don't make sense, don't try to understand where I'm coming from.

But it's not just the cravings, it's psychological torment as well- I'm fairly sure that I have mild/moderate dissociative amnesia, and watching the main character go through withdrawals....Was terrifying.

Hah, now I remember why my withdrawals didn't seem so bad. I couldn't fucking remember them.

Anyways, I don't know if I'm venting here or what, mostly because I don't know if there are any other addicts (active and going to respond) on here? If you're out there, do movies like that trigger you? Or ads, etc.? They've always triggered me. Maybe I'm just weak.

[ninja789]

Trainspotting is fantastic film and makes Edinburgh look really nice.... very accurate account though of how some people experience the city

You arent weak or we are just both weak together :P
Whenever there is like a party scene in a film I find myself wanting to do some coke again. Not like too strong a feeling but part of me wants it. whenever an attractive actress smokes I want a smoke too and random stuff sets off a craving for weed

[ImCoolBeans]

Movies don't usually bother me. Other random things will make me go crazy for a smoke. There are songs that make me feel like the movie made you feel, and it's really unavoidable if it just happens to hit you in that kind of way. The only thing to do is to avoid the triggers -- or try to at least.

[Karkat]

Trainspotting is fantastic film and makes Edinburgh look really nice.... very accurate account though of how some people experience the city

You arent weak or we are just both weak together :P
Whenever there is like a party scene in a film I find myself wanting to do some coke again. Not like too strong a feeling but part of me wants it. whenever an attractive actress smokes I want a smoke too and random stuff sets off a craving for weed

I know, I love it. Just wish it didn't affect me so. :P

(I keep forgetting that you're an addict as well ugh duh. I knew that. I feel like an idiot now. :whoops: )

Yeah, I get what you're saying.

Movies don't usually bother me. Other random things will make me go crazy for a smoke. There are songs that make me feel like the movie made you feel, and it's really unavoidable if it just happens to hit you in that kind of way. The only thing to do is to avoid the triggers -- or try to at least.

The Arctic Monkeys' new album AM makes me feel that way. Is there just something universal about that? I blame one of their previous album covers where there is actually a picture of a cigarette on the front. Grr.

Yeah, sometimes it'll hit me out of nowhere in movies- maybe that's why I have such a aversion to seeing new ones? I don't know. But I knew what I was up against with Trainspotting, at least for the most part. The withdrawal scene really caught me off guard though, I didn't remember that at all for some reason. Possibly for the same reason I didn't remember my actual withdrawals so much. I think I first saw the movie at 15 or barely 16, so it would've lined up with me actually going through withdrawal, or shortly thereafter... (How did that not make me go completely ballistic?)

It was kind of a dumb decision, but a few hours and a cup of coffee later, I'm doing better. :P I know better now.

[ImCoolBeans]

AM makes me feel sad too. Especially songs like "Why'd you only call me when you're high?" or "snap out of it." Now that I think of it, the whole album makes me feel that way. And I think that's more of the trigger than the music itself.

I thought you'd be cooled down by now, your post was pretty early. But I'm glad you're feeling ok now. Try not to let things like that get to you. I know it's hard to do, and it's definitely a lot easier said than done, but it's definitely something to work on -- you have to start somewhere, eh?

[Karkat]

AM makes me feel sad too. Especially songs like "Why'd you only call me when you're high?" or "snap out of it." Now that I think of it, the whole album makes me feel that way. And I think that's more of the trigger than the music itself.

I thought you'd be cooled down by now, your post was pretty early. But I'm glad you're feeling ok now. Try not to let things like that get to you. I know it's hard to do, and it's definitely a lot easier said than done, but it's definitely something to work on -- you have to start somewhere, eh?

Yeah, I do. Thanks, Mike. :)