Too perfect

[Remora]

Was very tempting to post this in P101, then realised it should be in Teen Sexuality, finally correcting myself, posting it here.

Either way.
*ahem*

As i might have bothered some people on these forums with already, i am currently having an insanely long-lasting crush.
And an insanely intense one too.

This has been of a great influence of my life; for example, in third class we have to choose what subjects we continue with and stuff so i literally copied his choices just for the sake of spending the most possible time with him.

I try to stay close him as much as possible so i can enjoy his presence but at the same time try to keep distance from him so i won't creep him out...

I'm so confused, so frustrated, i have no idea what to do, because in all honesty i'd rather just enjoy his presence for the next three years than take the risk of him beeing weirded out by me for that same period.

Aside from that i'm inexperienced. The only "sexual" thing i'd ever done with someone else was experimenting a bit with an old school friend, which went no farther than taking eachothers' genitals in our mouths and mutual masturbation, and now that i try to get him back on it he tries to work around it. I don't want to force him.

Then the third thing, even if he wasn't the straightest guy ever, sorry for my language, but i'm one hell of a ugly fucker. Nobody's going to fall in love with me anytime soon, male or female.

And last but definitely not least i have something that closely resembles a "social life", which i'm not willing to lose, especially not if the only guy i thought i could trust, the guy i wanted to share my life with, turned their back on me.

Just for the sake of this beeing a thread i'll describe him.
He's a bit taller than me, about 175-190 cm tall, has blonde, medium-length hair and a light skin (not pale, not tanned), he's got a flat belly and a sixpack- not a super obvious one but if you analyze it "closely" you'd notice he has it (which i don't quite like doing for reasons mentioned above). He lives with his one sister and his parents alongside a big black dog, he's spontaneous but i sometimes get the feeling as if he's actually rather unsure.

Currently there's two people that know about my crush; another guy in my class and a girl i hang out with occasionally (although i told the guy alot more, he's a close friend of my crush). When we had an expedition to York last year me, my crush, the other guy and another guy shared a room on the ferry we used to go there, and we had "the talk" that all guys have (although it went no farther than talking, after a while it switched subject to some girl) where i was semi-asleep and mentioned my crush was perfect, so i think he has his suspicions.

Thank you for hearing my rambling, any and all responses would be appreciated...

[Rahul_rajput]

oh dear.. in this condition.. il tel u one thing..
if u wont do it now u wont do it till the end..
n three years of ur life is a big thing to wait for some one..
u should go and tell your fellings to him in a special way(i mean to propose him in an awesome way)
if you dont tel him , he will never understand and will behave normally..
so tak this step and hit the ball , lets see it can b a home run or out..
u just have to try your luck dear..
:yes: i hope for the best.. :)

[Remora]

oh dear.. in this condition.. il tel u one thing..
if u wont do it now u wont do it till the end..
n three years of ur life is a big thing to wait for some one..
u should go and tell your fellings to him in a special way(i mean to propose him in an awesome way)
if you dont tel him , he will never understand and will behave normally..
so tak this step and hit the ball , lets see it can b a home run or out..
u just have to try your luck dear..
:yes: i hope for the best.. :)

Thank you for the reply- alot, actually, but there's a negative side to your "hit the ball" principe too, what if i hit the ball way too hard and it hits the little bit of reputation i have left? I don't get a homerun and i get punished for my failure...

[DiamondsGirl]

why "punished"? From what I infer from your first post, it seems like you guys are getting along great. If he's really a friend he won't just walk away on you. Trust me I've seen an example of that in my life. What's the worst that could happen? :) Go on and say it! x

[Remora]

why "punished"? From what I infer from your first post, it seems like you guys are getting along great. If he's really a friend he won't just walk away on you. Trust me I've seen an example of that in my life. What's the worst that could happen? :) Go on and say it! x

Once again, the "worst what could happen" is actually pretty damn terrible. It might not be from your perspective, but it IS from mine. I don't wanna be awkward friends with him, and if that means i can't be more than a normal friend then i'm willing to accept this.

By punished i mean that the last bit of social life i have in this universe is going to be gone, and that i'm gonna be on my own.

I'm sorry for not appearing thankful (i am, believe me) but i don't see why all you guys are all like "just go for it!"...

[DiamondsGirl]

because we really don't see the benefit of keeping on hiding your feelings? :) seriously though if you don't want to hear "go for it", what do you think you should do? xx

I know I'm starting to sound annoying by now, but how close are you and your friends? If you are really close, shouldn't you trust them not to walk away on you just because of this? It's not like you *want* to fall in love with this one person...

[Remora]

because we really don't see the benefit of keeping on hiding your feelings? :) seriously though if you don't want to hear "go for it", what do you think you should do? xx

I know I'm starting to sound annoying by now, but how close are you and your friends? If you are really close, shouldn't you trust them not to walk away on you just because of this? It's not like you *want* to fall in love with this one person...

Not really close... We do stuff in school and if there's parties outside of school sure, i'll come, but i don't do other stuff with them, sometimes i game with them but not 24/7.

There's 3 groups of people in our class.
The girls, the "badass boys" and the "good boys". Now the "badass boys" aren't very welcoming and i'd personally rather jump off a building than join them, with the reputation problems i have joining the "girls" wouldn't do very well (aside of which, "eww, boys", nuff said) so right now i'm in the third group, the "good boys". In order to be in a group you need to be accepted by everyone already in that group, or you might face some problems... generally since everyone's going to prefer my crush over "that ugly thing" called me, i'd be doomed.

And yes, i didn't choose to... but how would they know?

[DiamondsGirl]

Wow. Alright, that's harsh :( so sorry you're in this situation. Coming from a school where bullying is little to none and the kids blend well, I barely understand the difficulty of being put in a segregated social situation. You can always confess secretly so that no one would know, but I guess that's a pretty bad advice. The other option is of course telling yourself to stop being in love (it is possible, as impossible as it sounds) with this one guy and just wait until life offers you someone else. But that is also not a good advice D:

[Ethe14]

Not really close... We do stuff in school and if there's parties outside of school sure, i'll come, but i don't do other stuff with them, sometimes i game with them but not 24/7.

There's 3 groups of people in our class.
The girls, the "badass boys" and the "good boys". Now the "badass boys" aren't very welcoming and i'd personally rather jump off a building than join them, with the reputation problems i have joining the "girls" wouldn't do very well (aside of which, "eww, boys", nuff said) so right now i'm in the third group, the "good boys". In order to be in a group you need to be accepted by everyone already in that group, or you might face some problems... generally since everyone's going to prefer my crush over "that ugly thing" called me, i'd be doomed.

And yes, i didn't choose to... but how would they know?

Have you thought of making your own group? You say you have some friends so I'd suggest you make your own group. At my school everyone has their mini own group. Sure you've got the popular kids and the rest but I'm content with my own group of friends. I was also in this situation a couple of months ago. After telling the person I liked him(or almost telling him I got interrupted by a kiss) my friends accepted me and life went on. It's a chance I'd suggest you take.

[Remora]

Have you thought of making your own group?

Not quite, don't think it'd work out either as i'm not very "famous" (as mentioned before, low reputation), and he's not going to kiss me as soon as i attempt to tell him for sure....

PS: Pichu is amazing. Spread the word c:

[DiamondsGirl]

Why would you need to be famous to make your own group? A 'group' is just a circle of friends who go everywhere together and don't really talk to everyone else. In a social environment like your school, you'd certainly be happier in your own clique.

[Remora]

Why would you need to be famous to make your own group? A 'group' is just a circle of friends who go everywhere together and don't really talk to everyone else. In a social environment like your school, you'd certainly be happier in your own clique.

Once again i'm sorry for beeing so rude and harsh and not showing how thankful i am, but it's just that nobody "really" cares about me (aka if they had the choice of someone else in my class and me they'd choose that someone else). I don't need to be famous but i need to not be everyones "second choice" either.

[DiamondsGirl]

wow... I'm starting to hate your school now and I've only read about it! D: can you, like... join some youth community, music clubs or anything that interests you and make friends there? Sometimes school is just a nest of jerks and personally I prefer to be alone than making friends with those jerks =\ surely there's a place close to you where most (or even all) of the resident humans are not jerks?

As for the individual you fell for; if you don't think it is possible to confess then I guess you just gotta learn to get over him. Might be hard at first, but just try to tell yourself that you still have so many years ahead of you and this person is certainly not the last one life has to offer you x

[Remora]

wow... I'm starting to hate your school now and I've only read about it! D: can you, like... join some youth community, music clubs or anything that interests you and make friends there? Sometimes school is just a nest of jerks and personally I prefer to be alone than making friends with those jerks =\ surely there's a place close to you where most (or even all) of the resident humans are not jerks?

As for the individual you fell for; if you don't think it is possible to confess then I guess you just gotta learn to get over him. Might be hard at first, but just try to tell yourself that you still have so many years ahead of you and this person is certainly not the last one life has to offer you x

About the school, yes, it's a crap school but what do you expect, there's 2000 students on there and there's not enough space to teach them so we need to hire rooms at local driving schools.

About the individual, it's going better! we had some project on school today and i managed to get into a group with him, we went to his house this afternoon (the whole group :c ) to work on it, and i acted relatively cool, after that i talked to him on Skype for a while ^^ i'm so pumped (but i still realise it's probably not going to turn out becoming something)

[DiamondsGirl]

:) glad to hear you had a great day though x

[Remora]

:) glad to hear you had a great day though x

thanks so much!

he's actually talked to me! him -> me! YAY! <3

[random guy24]

Welp, then you see this... Im one of the other guys btw...

[Remora]

Welp, then you see this... Im one of the other guys btw...

There was something about anonymous stuff on these forums? haha, to be honest it's another other guy (you know who it is) i mean at the time of writing this

[Microcosm]

Passing notes is adorable. Just as an idea :3
Also, try to stay confident around him. Smile at him often. Let him know you like him.

Hope I could help.

[Remora]

Passing notes is adorable. Just as an idea :3
Also, try to stay confident around him. Smile at him often. Let him know you like him.

Hope I could help.

The issue has been, uhm, resolved already, check out this thread (http://virtualteen.org/forums/showthread.php?t=210589). Thank you for the reply though.