What is a slut and is it bad?

[Emma1133]

So as I have hit puberty and I'm like super horny all the time, I got curious about the idea of a slut. I didn't really know what one was but I know it's a negative term. So I looked up the definition.

It said a slut was a woman who has many casual sexual partners.

So first, I guess that means men can't be sluts. That doesn't seem right, lol.

Any way, what do you think a slut is and is it bad? Is it bad to have casual sex partners?

[Shooting-star]

It's a derogatory term invented to "keep women in their place". Unfortunately here in the U.S sex is seen as a terrible thing. Don't feel ashamed about being horny or having "too many partners" (how many partners is too many?) Just be you and don't worry about that derogatory nonsense :)

[Pultost]

I don't see any problems with it, as long as you use protection and stay safe. It's funny how guys who sleep with many girls are considered studs while girls are labeled as sluts. Like you say, it's not fair. :P

[Emma04]

I don't see any problems with it, as long as you use protection and stay safe. It's funny how guys who sleep with many girls are considered studs while girls are labeled as sluts. Like you say, it's not fair. :P

It’s double standards, it’s ok for boys but not for girls

[Natacha]

It's just as okay for girls as it is for boys. Luckily we are equal in the western world.
Don't mind the crap. Do what you want, enjoy exploring and get experienced :-)

[Pultost]

It’s double standards, it’s ok for boys but not for girls

Yeah, gotta "love" those double standards.

[Catt]

Yeah, gotta "love" those double standards.

Ugh totally
I’ve heard the “key argument” as to why it’s okay for boys
A key that can open every lock is a master key
A lock that can be opened by any key is a shitty lock

WE AREN’T INANIMATE OBJECTS!!

So long as you can keep your self respect and are doing what you want to do for you and not because it’s expected by the guys that you’ll do it for them then it’s not a bad thing I think

[Catt]

So as I have hit puberty and I'm like super horny all the time, I got curious about the idea of a slut. I didn't really know what one was but I know it's a negative term. So I looked up the definition.

It said a slut was a woman who has many casual sexual partners.

So first, I guess that means men can't be sluts. That doesn't seem right, lol.

Any way, what do you think a slut is and is it bad? Is it bad to have casual sex partners?

It’s a term to put girls down for being confident and not conservative etc
Have you started having sex yet?

[Pultost]

Ugh totally
I’ve heard the “key argument” as to why it’s okay for boys
A key that can open every lock is a master key
A lock that can be opened by any key is a shitty lock

WE AREN’T INANIMATE OBJECTS!!

So long as you can keep your self respect and are doing what you want to do for you and not because it’s expected by the guys that you’ll do it for them then it’s not a bad thing I think

Couldn't have put it better myself. :yes:

On the other hand, guys seem to be ridiculed when they're being abused and not the other way around, which is just as unfair, but that's of course a discussion for another time and place.

[Allover Kelly]

An old joke. If a girl sleeps with 10 guys she a slut, if a guy does it he's gay.

[Knightley]

I think its sad that you hear girls calling each other sluts more then you hear boys calling girls sluts.

There's someone at my friends school everyone calls the man slut because he cheats on all his girlfriend's lol

[BJade]

It's sad that girls get called sluts and boys get praised for sleeping with multiple people. If your doing it like cheating on someone then maybe its justified but if both know theres going to be multiple partners then it's not. Me personally I cant see myself wanting to be with anyone other that one person I'm in a relationship with

[Rachie97]

My rule is there is no problem having sex with a lot of partners as long as you practice safe sex and don’t have sex with anyone that is in a non-open relationship with someone else. If they lie about being single when they are not, that’s on them.

[xSashax]

Slut the word is supposed to be bad and they say sex is something shameful and bad. I think doing whatever you like is totally fine and nothing wrong with that. No one should judge you.

[AshleighB]

It’s double standards, it’s ok for boys but not for girls

Yes boys are studs, girls are sluts double standards at it finest

[gurquenjen]

It's part of horrible double standard that is the product of centuries of Patriarchy, and it is one of the words girls use to control and put down other girls. As long as you are safe (condoms and/or the Pill, get tested regularly and make your partners do the same), having casual sex is just wonderful and the best way to learn what you like.

[Caycedilla]

I don’t think of it as bad, just a choice of how physical you want to be and how often you actually have sex. It is weird though that girls are thought of negatively when they do it a lot, when guys are doing the same thing

[Shiny Moon]

All I can say is I like being a slut :P
I don't care what people think, it's my pussy, not theirs, so fuck off.

[Uniquemind]

I think in the approaching age of anti-biotic resistant STD/STI’s rising this label is actually going to get worse over the next several decades however.

I think generally it’s a surface term or label used as an insult, that is just wrong to use, and is misused in the context of jealousy and anger towards women.

But the pros and cons of promiscuity is a real talk worth having, but this time I think guys are judged a bit more harshly in the same way, not equally but I think society is beginning to frown at promiscuity from guys too.

I’ve also seen and heard stories from peers and from my parents generation about how promiscuity (or the label of a slut) is used because offering sex, especially in hierarchy power structures (sleeping with teachers, coaches, professors, a boss) it really IS an unethical use of sexual allure.

Even among mutual friends I’ve seen, and I’m sure you have too, how many of us can feel threatened if a new girl enters social scene, and you fear she’ll get all the attention.

Or perhaps you’re the one who people feel threatened of and suddenly false rumors are flying about you and you find it hard to fit in.


So we say “don’t judge” but I’m not so convinced society can do that so easily because at the root of it all.

Sexual opportunity or even the hint of it, IS used as a form of social power exchange; a type of currency. If sex was just about finding meaningful experiences to grow oneself internally as a person, that’s a very different perspective and conversation.

I only mention this because nobody brought this perspective on the topic of labels.

[jeanZ]

I have no problem with girls having multiple partners and I don't consider them sluts.

I consider a slut to be a girl who uses her body to get what she wants, outside of the social scene.
In my social circle, guys who sleep with a lot of girls are called players and it's not a compliment. I don't use that term either.

I really haven't seen girls mistreated of talked about badly because they're known to have had multiple partners. Many of them talk about it openly like a badge of honor, which is also alright by me, though personally, I'm more private about my life.

I do think it's in poor taste for either boys or girls to go around naming the people they've had sex with. Those people may not want it to be known.

[Jessica.lang19]

It's a huge double standard between guys and girls. Unfortunately that's the way it is, guys who have been with lots of girls will always be revered and celebrated, while girls that have been with a lot of guys will always be the subject of gossip and name calling.

[Uniquemind]

It's a huge double standard between guys and girls. Unfortunately that's the way it is, guys who have been with lots of girls will always be revered and celebrated, while girls that have been with a lot of guys will always be the subject of gossip and name calling.

I think a hint of the double-standard will always be around unfortunately. But I definitely think progress about being judgmental is being made, the debate seems to be shifting to a deeper analysis about WHY is someone being promiscuous rather than the fact of their having sex making them bad or dirty.

And sexual ed, has been a big part of that confidence growth about what’s factual about sexually activity and what is not. Always consult your OBGYN doctor for the best information.

But the fact is especially in some parts of the country many girls don’t have parents who feel comfortable talking about sexual development or even taking them to OBGYN doctors.

Many don’t coach us through how to handle hormonal urges and what they mean, or to deal with social judgement about those urges, especially if you come from religious families.

It’s a real gap in sexual education in my opinion. We end up learning by experience and from our friends and that’s for better or worse.

[MagicGinnySurprise]

It’s a relic of a time when sex was inseparable from pregnancy and women were baby factories. Women were supposed to be untouched when they got married so the man could be sure the kids were his, that way his money would go to his own descendants. Nobody cares if he’s got kids with another woman, but he has to know his legitimate kids came from his sperm.

Nowadays it’s more an insult girls throw at each other. Girls who are shy or scared or bitchy will call other girls sluts, either to put them down or because they’re jealous of the fun we’re having. I say just own it. Yeah, I have a lot of sex. Sex is fun. Why wouldn’t I want to do it as often as I can?

[gymgurl]

id be a lesbian slut :P.. lol. cause no guy would call u a slut that way. haha

[deepthroat_tacos]

All I can say is I like being a slut :P
I don't care what people think, it's my pussy, not theirs, so fuck off.

The perfect words for this topic

[ClaireHofmann]

I'm pretty sure a lot of people consider me a slut. The fact that I'm bisexual also doesn't help. I probably shouldn't be having so much casual sex.

[xELENAx]

It's a huge double standard between guys and girls. Unfortunately that's the way it is, guys who have been with lots of girls will always be revered and celebrated, while girls that have been with a lot of guys will always be the subject of gossip and name calling.

This is so true.....

If I give 3 guys a blowjob I'm called a slut.

If a guy gets 3 blowjibs from 3 different girls, he is a hero.:what::what::what:

[ClaireHofmann]

This is so true.....

If I give 3 guys a blowjob I'm called a slut.

If a guy gets 3 blowjobs from 3 different girls, he is a hero.:what::what::what:
I agree, but girls also think like that. When I was 13-14 and some people discovered that I was giving blowjobs to a boy from my class and was also openly kissing other girls, some girls from school were the first ones to call me a slut at the time.

[Atlantis]

bumped :locked: