Gay. Came out to my sister.

[Tonydero]

Hey Everyone.
So I knew I was gay about 7 months ago (I’m 16). I realized I was super attracted to guys and I was never atttaced to girls. I masturbated to guys and gay porn and on the street for example I’ll be looking at guys. I’m pretty sure I’m gay.
Yesterday I came out to my sister (20) and she was super happy for me, but she said that I’m a little young and the truth is since I haven’t kissed a girl/guy or had sex with a girl/guy So i don’t really know. She thinks I should experiment and really know.
I still am almost positive I’m gay cause I’m attracted to men! I literally only have sexual attraction to men and basically none to women.
What do you guys think? Should I come out soon, or should I wait until I experiment more? Thanks!

[Second Chance]

Hey Everyone.
So I knew I was gay about 7 months ago (I’m 16). I realized I was super attracted to guys and I was never atttaced to girls. I masturbated to guys and gay porn and on the street for example I’ll be looking at guys. I’m pretty sure I’m gay.
Yesterday I came out to my sister (20) and she was super happy for me, but she said that I’m a little young and the truth is since I haven’t kissed a girl/guy or had sex with a girl/guy So i don’t really know. She thinks I should experiment and really know.
I still am almost positive I’m gay cause I’m attracted to men! I literally only have sexual attraction to men and basically none to women.
What do you guys think? Should I come out soon, or should I wait until I experiment more? Thanks!

It is pretty clear that you are gay based upon what you have described, and it is good that your Sister was supportive.

I would be careful about coming out because you need to look at the situation at home and beyond. If you have a family that would accept your reality and support you, then coming out should not be an issue; if you have a family that is homophobic, then wait until you're 18 and are out on your own to come out because by then you can do your own thing. My thinking is that you really should hold off on coming out until you find the right person and know that you will be safe at home, with your extended family, and beyond.

As for experimenting, I would not recommend that. It is not good that you use others or yourself as a guinea pig to determine your sexuality. When you share yourself with someone it has to be because you both deeply care about each other and want to express that love in a physical way. Sexuality should not be like going to an ice cream store where one takes samples of different ice creams to figure out what they like. It is your choice, but I would not just put yourself out there and be used like a tissue for the sake of discovering your sexuality.

[Coping]

Hey Everyone.
So I knew I was gay about 7 months ago (I’m 16). I realized I was super attracted to guys and I was never atttaced to girls. I masturbated to guys and gay porn and on the street for example I’ll be looking at guys. I’m pretty sure I’m gay.
Yesterday I came out to my sister (20) and she was super happy for me, but she said that I’m a little young and the truth is since I haven’t kissed a girl/guy or had sex with a girl/guy So i don’t really know. She thinks I should experiment and really know.
I still am almost positive I’m gay cause I’m attracted to men! I literally only have sexual attraction to men and basically none to women.
What do you guys think? Should I come out soon, or should I wait until I experiment more? Thanks!

First off, good on you for knowing yourself. Second, sounds like you've got a great and supportive sister. All I'd suggest saying to her is to ask how she knew she was straight (assuming she is) before she'd ever kissed a guy. There are some things you just know and at 16 you're only a short skip from being considered an adult.

Bear in mind that sexual attraction isn't a once-and-forever carved in stone thing. It can change. When I was 12 or 13 I was certain I was gay. By 15/16 I thought I was straight. Now I'm certain I am bisexual and attracted to both guys and girls.

Whatever, be confident in yourself. Have fun and be safe with those you get involved with and make sure there is respect involved and that it goes both ways. Peace. :cool:

[LucaBaLuca]

Hey Everyone.
So I knew I was gay about 7 months ago (I’m 16). I realized I was super attracted to guys and I was never atttaced to girls. I masturbated to guys and gay porn and on the street for example I’ll be looking at guys. I’m pretty sure I’m gay.
Yesterday I came out to my sister (20) and she was super happy for me, but she said that I’m a little young and the truth is since I haven’t kissed a girl/guy or had sex with a girl/guy So i don’t really know. She thinks I should experiment and really know.
I still am almost positive I’m gay cause I’m attracted to men! I literally only have sexual attraction to men and basically none to women.
What do you guys think? Should I come out soon, or should I wait until I experiment more? Thanks!


Well done for knowing, being proud of and telling your sister and all of us. I’m also the same as you (except I’m 13) with the same situation and the few people I have told (close friends) have been really supportive and proud of me. If you are sure you are gay then you shouldn’t have to experiment. If your family don’t judge homosexuals then it should be ok to come out to them and if your friends are true friends then they shouldn’t judge you either so it’s up to you but it should be ok to come out whenever

Recently I told my parents and they said similar things, about how I should experiment but they also said to keep an open mind because I might just be confused but I know I’m not because it’s been at least a year since I realised I was gay... I don’t know how to feel to be honest because I feel like they don’t trust me or don’t want that to be who I am but they say they will support me no matter what.

[ska8er]

I would say that u r gay and if the
time is right I would experiment but
since u have had no contact with girls
or guys how can u experiment more to
prove if u r gay or not. There is nothing
wrong in being gay and if u care to come
out and u r confident in urself to do so
then do it but there is no hurry.

[coolmatt]

If you say you are gay then you are gay. Experiment if you want to but dont do it cause You think you have to.

[jamie_n5]

You need not come out as gay until you feel the time is right. There is no problem with experimenting too. I would say by what you posted that you are most likely gay. I knew myself when I was between 11-12.

[Spooky_Eli]

no offense but, your sister sounds like a c**T

[Matt 04]

It is pretty clear that you are gay based upon what you have described, and it is good that your Sister was supportive.

I would be careful about coming out because you need to look at the situation at home and beyond. If you have a family that would accept your reality and support you, then coming out should not be an issue; if you have a family that is homophobic, then wait until you're 18 and are out on your own to come out because by then you can do your own thing. My thinking is that you really should hold off on coming out until you find the right person and know that you will be safe at home, with your extended family, and beyond.

As for experimenting, I would not recommend that. It is not good that you use others or yourself as a guinea pig to determine your sexuality. When you share yourself with someone it has to be because you both deeply care about each other and want to express that love in a physical way. Sexuality should not be like going to an ice cream store where one takes samples of different ice creams to figure out what they like. It is your choice, but I would not just put yourself out there and be used like a tissue for the sake of discovering your sexuality.

I agree with the above. I would wait until 18 to tell anyone else. A friend of mine told his parents and he was thrown out of his house.

[drhalsey1]

Sexuality is about attraction, not experience, so if you're attracted to guys but not girls and you're sure of that, then you're most likely gay. You don't need to have kissed, had sex, or otherwise experimented with someone to know sexuality for sure.

[Tonydero]

Well ok then. She’s not she was super nice about it, she was just in a little bit of shock and she wants to make sure that I’m happy. Quite the opposite of a c**t tbh.

[InternetTeen]

If you think and feel you are gay then you are gay. Don't let your sister decide what you are.

[Reg__]

good for you man! Don't be afraid to switch around labels a lot, but if you feel like something sticks, than thats the one for you. if you feel like you are gay then you are gay and that is that

[baseballhockey5]

You seem pretty sure about your sexual orientation. That's really brave of you to come out like that.

[Connordude]

Sexuality is about attraction, not experience, so if you're attracted to guys but not girls and you're sure of that, then you're most likely gay. You don't need to have kissed, had sex, or otherwise experimented with someone to know sexuality for sure.

Totally agree
It’s like my best buddy is gay but before he came out he was really conflicted as you can imagine and girls loved this guy (what’s up with that lol?) and he’s done stuff with them - but he told me how he felt he really was
He knew I was straight but asked if we could try some things
Just for him to be sure basically, and yes we did and yes he realised he was totes gay
I’m not saying I was grossed out or didn’t like all of it but I’m not attracted to him or other guys - I’m comfortable with me

[CharlesB]

Love you my dude.

I came out at 15 so I know you're struggles!


talk to me if you need, I know the feels.

[shadylex]

I mean I have sex or had my first kiss, but I masturbate to gay porn and just know that I am 100 percent gay. Wait a few more months tho to make sure u are confident in yourself and it will make it easier to come out, good luck x

[heyoh]

I mean unless you feel like you will be saddened by not coming out then i would just keep it to yourself. Not because you should hide your feelings or anything but just bec you said you haven't kissed a girl or anything yet so it's nice to just keep your options open. If you come out then girls won't even try. But you might really not be open to trying anything with a girl so then this doesn't matter lol. Just up to you bro.