Order of First Times

[JuliaVT]

Has anyone here had (or considered) anal before vaginal sex, and are there really any disadvantages to doing that first?

[Jessi03]

I've heard of it from people who want to keep their virginity, in the traditional definition of it, by having anal first. Anal doesn't appeal to me at all so I wouldn't do it myself.

[Katie2003]

Has anyone here had (or considered) anal before vaginal sex, and are there really any disadvantages to doing that first?


I've done that because of mom's rule against us girls having vaginal intercourse until we are 19 and away at college. She encourages all other forms of sexual exploration, and prefers that we aren't on BC pills, so that's a realistic option and what mom did as a teen and young woman before she was married. She's advocated that for me and my big sis as well. For girls who want to preserve vaginal virginity, it's also a good option that allows them to have fun.

I've been allowing my boyfriends to have intercourse in my rectum for the past several months and see no disadvantages to going there for anyone who is comfortable with that. It does take getting used to and can be painful if you do it wrong or too fast at first. It can also be simply amazing!

I think it's a good stepping stone to having vaginal intercourse at a later date.

[Jordan99]

I had vaginal intercourse with my BF first. We tried anal a few months later. It took some getting used to, but it truly is very intimate and enjoyable. Anal is also a handy way to have penetrative sex when it's my time of the month. Like Katie stated above, it takes getting used to and if not done properly or if it goes too fast, it can be painful. Also, the rectum doesn't naturally lube itself so lots of lube should be used and your BF should ease into you slowly to prevent fissures. After I relax, I'm able to really enjoy anal intercourse.

[Anna Kadlecova]

I had anal few manth befor vaginal.

[ImJulia]

I have only had anal

[ImXur-girl]

I've done that because of mom's rule against us girls having vaginal intercourse until we are 19 and away at college. She encourages all other forms of sexual exploration, and prefers that we aren't on BC pills, so that's a realistic option and what mom did as a teen and young woman before she was married. She's advocated that for me and my big sis as well. For girls who want to preserve vaginal virginity, it's also a good option that allows them to have fun.

I've been allowing my boyfriends to have intercourse in my rectum for the past several months and see no disadvantages to going there for anyone who is comfortable with that. It does take getting used to and can be painful if you do it wrong or too fast at first. It can also be simply amazing!

I think it's a good stepping stone to having vaginal intercourse at a later date.

Are you worried at all that in the heat of the moment you might give in to temptation and allow the guy your with to enter your vagina?

[LITTLEANGEL19]

I've done that because of mom's rule against us girls having vaginal intercourse until we are 19 and away at college. She encourages all other forms of sexual exploration, and prefers that we aren't on BC pills, so that's a realistic option and what mom did as a teen and young woman before she was married. She's advocated that for me and my big sis as well. For girls who want to preserve vaginal virginity, it's also a good option that allows them to have fun.

I've been allowing my boyfriends to have intercourse in my rectum for the past several months and see no disadvantages to going there for anyone who is comfortable with that. It does take getting used to and can be painful if you do it wrong or too fast at first. It can also be simply amazing!

I think it's a good stepping stone to having vaginal intercourse at a later date.
That's just means you found a "LOOPHOLE" In your mums rule:yes:

[LITTLEANGEL19]

I have NEVER had any anal sexual activity, and I NEVER would and that includes masturbation.

[ChloeF]

l've never tried anal and have no real inclination to do so.
Vaginal on the other hand......

[Katie2003]

That's just means you found a "LOOPHOLE" In your mums rule:yes:


I didn't find the loophole, our mom actually told us to do it that way as that's how my grandma had advised her when she was a teen........she fully supports doing it that way both as a method of BC and to remain a vaginal virgin.......mom says it was very common practice when she was growing up and in college. It works for me :)

[Katie2003]

Are you worried at all that in the heat of the moment you might give in to temptation and allow the guy your with to enter your vagina?

I've been with two boys so far, and had sex multiple times since starting several months ago. They are both quite clear on mom's rule and so far there's never been any temptation to go there. Mom said "after age 18" which I wasn't quite clear on and later she explained that didn't mean "at" or "while" we were 18, it actually means after we turn 19 or are away at college as she feels at that point a girl is mature enough to be responsible about vaginal intercourse and take care of BC responsibly.

[LITTLEANGEL19]

I didn't find the loophole, our mom actually told us to do it that way as that's how my grandma had advised her when she was a teen........she fully supports doing it that way both as a method of BC and to remain a vaginal virgin.......mom says it was very common practice when she was growing up and in college. It works for me :)

Even for me it just sounds very strange your mum or any mum would tell her daughters to do it.

[DanielleIU]

Even for me it just sounds very strange your mum or any mum would tell her daughters to do it.

I think I understand. It's like when some parents say, you shouldn't have sex until you're older or until you're married...BUT if you do, you should use condoms and be on bc. Same thing here. If you're going to have sex, you should do it this way until you're 19. Agree it seems different, but not irrational either.

I had anal first, mostly because it simplified bc for me. I really don't see any disadvantages, other than maybe it takes more preparation and lube. It does help take all or most of the bc issues away. The first time can be painful at the start so be prepared and have plenty of privacy. It's very intimate and feels awesome once you get used to the feeling.

[Katie2003]

I think I understand. It's like when some parents say, you shouldn't have sex until you're older or until you're married...BUT if you do, you should use condoms and be on bc. Same thing here. If you're going to have sex, you should do it this way until you're 19. Agree it seems different, but not irrational either.

I had anal first, mostly because it simplified bc for me. I really don't see any disadvantages, other than maybe it takes more preparation and lube. It does help take all or most of the bc issues away. The first time can be painful at the start so be prepared and have plenty of privacy. It's very intimate and feels awesome once you get used to the feeling.

Danielle has it right. And it's totally awesome once you are used to it. TBH at this point, I have no interest in doing vaginal intercourse since this is working for me.

My grandma is a nurse and when she grew up BC pills didn't exist and she says the condoms were of questionable quality and not easy for boys to obtain as they were kept behind pharmacy counters. So this was offered as an option and many girls chose to use it. My mom was quite clear that this option was available to us and that she had done this for a number of years herself in her teens and while at college. I see it as being responsible for what you choose to do when other options aren't available to you for whatever reasons.

[AshleighB]

Not done either don’t know what I want first now for the girls who had anal first did u masturbate that way first before doing anal do you need to use protection for anal don’t know what I want to do first

[Katie2003]

Not done either don’t know what I want first now for the girls who had anal first did u masturbate that way first before doing anal do you need to use protection for anal don’t know what I want to do first

While you don't absolutely need to use protection, you do need to be aware there is a very remote chance that if semen leaks out of your rectum and makes it's way up inside your vagina, that wouldn't be a good thing. I've never had a boy use protection though.

I had masturbated that way for a few years before ever doing that with a boy.

As we have said in all the topics mentioning this, it's uncomfortable at first and def a learning curve with relaxing and then it feels just wonderful. What you do need is plenty of lubrication, and plenty of time to relax and do things slowly.

[stoneflowe96]

I had vaginal sex first with my first bf when I was 16. Anal was something for masturbation, until now with my gf. I don't understand anal as bc, because you need anyway a condom. There is a high risk fot STDs or the possibility that sperm could get afterwards to your vagina. At least this is something I read in German sexual education.

[DanielleIU]

I had vaginal sex first with my first bf when I was 16. Anal was something for masturbation, until now with my gf. I don't understand anal as bc, because you need anyway a condom. There is a high risk fot STDs or the possibility that sperm could get afterwards to your vagina. At least this is something I read in German sexual education.

Perhaps this is a good place to recite some very important facts about condoms. Condoms provide a physical barrier, so they are indeed very important and effective in preventing the spread of STDs. This is why condom use is critical in non-monogamous relationships, whether you’re having vaginal or anal sex.

As birth control, condoms are theoretically 98% effective. In practice, however, they are only 80-85% effective. Think about it. That means that one in five girls who have sex using a condom as their only form of birth control will get pregnant. (Note that I said girls and not couples because it’s really us who bear this burden.) Or put another way, if you have sex five times using only a condom, the chances are you’ll get pregnant once. Of course, everyone is different and there are ways to improve (lessen) your odds. Examples are withdrawal before your boy orgasms, spermicidal jellies, or avoiding ovulation times. Another is anal sex. The probability of getting pregnant from anal sex is extremely low, even without a condom. And again, there are ways to improve your odds: wear a condom, withdrawal, or use a position like missionary to ensure that gravity takes excess seminal fluid down and away from the vagina. To address your particular comment, anal sex is indeed a practice with a much lower possibility of pregnancy. Some may even argue it’s a form of birth control, especially in the heat of the moment when no other birth control method is available. With any sexual practice though, it just makes sense to stop and think before you act. I should mention that anal sex isn’t for everyone; it’s just an option. Personal choice is everything.

[Ashley 2003]

Perhaps this is a good place to recite some very important facts about condoms. Condoms provide a physical barrier, so they are indeed very important and effective in preventing the spread of STDs. This is why condom use is critical in non-monogamous relationships, whether you’re having vaginal or anal sex.

As birth control, condoms are theoretically 98% effective. In practice, however, they are only 80-85% effective. Think about it. That means that one in five girls who have sex using a condom as their only form of birth control will get pregnant. (Note that I said girls and not couples because it’s really us who bear this burden.) Or put another way, if you have sex five times using only a condom, the chances are you’ll get pregnant once. Of course, everyone is different and there are ways to improve (lessen) your odds. Examples are withdrawal before your boy orgasms, spermicidal jellies, or avoiding ovulation times. Another is anal sex. The probability of getting pregnant from anal sex is extremely low, even without a condom. And again, there are ways to improve your odds: wear a condom, withdrawal, or use a position like missionary to ensure that gravity takes excess seminal fluid down and away from the vagina. To address your particular comment, anal sex is indeed a practice with a much lower possibility of pregnancy. Some may even argue it’s a form of birth control, especially in the heat of the moment when no other birth control method is available. With any sexual practice though, it just makes sense to stop and think before you act. I should mention that anal sex isn’t for everyone; it’s just an option. Personal choice is everything.

Very Well said

[Ashley2004]

I did vaginal first but there's nothing wrong with doing anal first if you want to. I wasn't worried about maintaining virginity or anything so that wasn't a concern of mine. The only disadvantage of anal is that you need lube, so if you don't have any handy, it won't be a very good experience.

[ImJulia]

I did vaginal first but there's nothing wrong with doing anal first if you want to. I wasn't worried about maintaining virginity or anything so that wasn't a concern of mine. The only disadvantage of anal is that you need lube, so if you don't have any handy, it won't be a very good experience.

This. There is no such hting as too much lube the first time you do anal.

[ClaraPott]

I never did it. And I dont want it!

[Jessi03]

I never did it. And I dont want it!

Totally agree. I know some people find it appealing, but for me it will always be an exit hole lol.

[DanielleIU]

Not done either don’t know what I want first now for the girls who had anal first did u masturbate that way first before doing anal do you need to use protection for anal don’t know what I want to do first

I did masturbate that way before having anal sex. Initially it was mostly done for preparation, but the more I did it the more I enjoyed it, and the more confident I became. Still the first time can be a little shocking. We didn't use a condom because it was the first time for both of us and we used a position where gravity was our friend. Everyone and every circumstance is different, though. As Ashley said, needing lube is a disadvantage, but having the bc burden lifted makes up for it imho. Oh, and you'll want a little more privacy for a first anal.

[EmilyM]

I did vaginal sex first. I haven’t done anal yet but I want to haha. Most girls I know went through their first times in the usual order ( hj, bj, vag, anal) but it’s all about what you prefer and are comfortable with

[Beccabear]

Haven’t tried either, I’m a loser, lol

[xSashax]

It’s perfectly ok to go in that order. It’s the same for me, first blowjob, then ass and then vagina.

[Pultost]

Nope. Asshole sex is not for me.

[ImXur-girl]

Nope. Asshole sex is not for me.

I feel the same way right now.

[Maddie2000]

I did blowjobs first then vaginal then anal.

[Allover Kelly]

Oral first, Vag and then Anal

[KateMarshal]

Oh, how long was between oral, vaginal and anal - days, years, ...?

I did only oral and I hate idea of anal. It must be painfully!

[Sharpkakie]

I did vaginal first then anal

[ImJulia]

I was with one girl on holidays who only did anal and was keeping her virginity and not risking pregnancy
I wasn’t even planning on going that far with her but she asked if I wanted to... was really special

Ya that’s why I did anal first and it ended up being a special occasion.

[ImJulia]

Was really special for us too
And it was her first time with a guy who wasn’t her bf (recently ex) so was different for, never been intimate with someone other than him

We just really hit it off and we’re comfortable together there
Boys like holiday romances too ;)

Aw that’s cute. I have done vaginal with my bf since but we still do anal regularly bc it seems extra special

[ImJulia]

That’s really cool! Lucky both of you

The main thing is if you like it too, not just doing it for him

First time kinda sucked but I grew to like it

[prtygurl]

No-one that I saw mentioned the downside for the boy - infection.

[Shiny Moon]

Like most girls I did vaginal first and anal later, but it's fine if you want to do anal first. :)

[Natacha]

I had vaginal first too, but I love anal too. Anal takes more preparation to be good, and I didn't trust my first partner to understand that.

[Naturelover]

I never had anal sex and I do not want it.

[Lila123]

I’ve only had vaginal, and only once. We’ve been talking about moving to anal instead, to prevent babies.

[ClaireHofmann]

I never had anal sex and I do not want it.
Same for me. I just don't think I'd enjoy it very much.

[Brigje]

I never had anal sex and I do not want it.

Same for me. I just don't think I'd enjoy it very much.

I have tried anal sex, but I figured that it is not my thing.

[ClaireHofmann]

I have tried anal sex, but I figured that it is not my thing.
I like some anal play, but not full penetration. It's so good when someone spits on it and then rubs it during sex.

[Brigje]

I like some anal play, but not full penetration. It's so good when someone spits on it and then rubs it during sex.

Yes, it is something like that, or the tip of a finger for me as well.

[Alexis9999]

I've considered it but I don't know if I could go thru with it.

[ClaireHofmann]

Yes, it is something like that, or the tip of a finger for me as well.
It just feels so nice.

[Caitigrrl]

Yes I had anal before vaginal, my aunt has been my female role model since I was 11 and she encouraged me to consider it first as it’s safer and can choose who for my virginity later
That’s what she said her and my mom were encouraged to do as teens too

[Anna Kadlecova]

Yes I had anal before vaginal, my aunt has been my female role model since I was 11 and she encouraged me to consider it first as it’s safer and can choose who for my virginity later
That’s what she said her and my mom were encouraged to do as teens too
How old were you when you did it?

[Caitigrrl]

How old were you when you did it?

I was 12, he was 13
He was super careful and it was much better than I thought it could be

[Anna Kadlecova]

Omg. 12?!?

[Anna Kadlecova]

And vaginal? I had vaginal 6 manth after anal. I was for both 17 yo...

[Caitigrrl]

Omg. 12?!?

I know that’s early, but it felt right
I don’t regret

[Caitigrrl]

And vaginal? I had vaginal 6 manth after anal. I was for both 17 yo...

Much later that year, same ages

[Anna Kadlecova]

Was it painful?

[Caitigrrl]

Was it painful?

The first few times for both but not so painful that I couldn’t wait to try again

What about for you?

[Anna Kadlecova]

Hmm, first anal was a little paintful but nothink realy bad. I had lot of experience with anal masturbation and I wanted try it.

First vaginal was ok. I was old enought and he was gentle...

[ashleigh7]

First kissing...then handjob, then “V” intercourse and bJ happened the same night. :)

[Caitigrrl]

Hmm, first anal was a little paintful but nothink realy bad. I had lot of experience with anal masturbation and I wanted try it.

First vaginal was ok. I was old enought and he was gentle...

He sounds like a good bf :)

[Taylorrrb]

For me the order was hj bj vag anal.

[Caitigrrl]

For me the order was hj bj vag anal.

What ages?

[Taylorrrb]

what ages?

13,13,14,15 :)

[Caitigrrl]

13,13,14,15 :)

Very cool :)
Mine was a little different 12 12 13 12

[ShyBGGirl]

I did it in the classic order - vaginal first, together with oral. Anal came much later but I really enjoy it when in the mood.

[bouldghirl]

I have NEVER had any anal sexual activity, and I NEVER would and that includes masturbation.

Make that two of us. Yuk!

[Naturelover]

I have NEVER had any anal sexual activity, and I NEVER would and that includes masturbation.

Make that two of us. Yuk!

now we are already 3.

[DanielleIU]

I’ve found for myself and among friends that most relationships (long and short) seem to lead to consideration of anal at some point. For some it may happen at the very start due to lack of adequate bc or a desire to preserve vag virginity. For others, it happens when the relationship deepens as another act of intimacy or just because you want to experiment together. Lots of circumstances determine what order is right for you and all are equally normal. Chances are, even those who say never will encounter the opportunity; it’s just a matter of whether you choose to take it. Just be sure it’s indeed your choice.

[andrea03]

That's my only option. I'd love to try it, but have to find the right guy.

[LDavis05]

I think I would prefer vaginal for my first time, I can see why some might try anal if they want to stay a virgin

[EmilySwimmer]

Has anyone here had (or considered) anal before vaginal sex, and are there really any disadvantages to doing that first?

I never tried anal yet, I heard that it hurts

[martinaCRO14]

For me the order was hj bj vag anal.

same ,but my brush was the first then your order

[tinkerkell]

I thought about doing anal first just because I love the sensation but I chickened out and blew the first real opportunity to have anal sex that I got, so I ended up having vaginal sex a couple months before I did the butt stuff. My best friend has anal sex instead of vaginal sex though

[EmilySwimmer]

I just did anal for the first time 2 days ago. It feels intense.

Sry if that is too much info

[Emilyfox]

Anal just sounds scary but I know a few who do it to not get pregnant, mostly girls on the reservation, but they seem to enjoy it

[ZoeH]

Ive never done anything but I have 0 interest in any anal stuff

[tinkerkell]

I just did anal for the first time 2 days ago. It feels intense.

Sry if that is too much info

Hope it went well!

[Emilyfox]

I just did anal for the first time 2 days ago. It feels intense.

Sry if that is too much info

Oh wow wild, how was it? Would you want to again?

[KateMarshal]

Im 17 yo and virgin. I did only oral and I was 16.

[Kaja Fialiva]

1th vaginal and oral and after that anal

[Lexi_02]

I did oral then vag then anal

[annababy02]

I did oral and then vag.....idk about anal

[Lexi_02]

I did oral and then vag.....idk about anal

Anal isnt for everyone.

[nadja]

I've had oral, vaginal and then much later anal.

[Lindsaylovesyou]

I did oral then vag, I haven’t done anal

[Pultost]

Update from last time I replied, I did oral first, then vaginal, and anal is still not happening. Ever.

[big-girls-dont-cry]

Just oral so far for me

[Emma04]

I have only done vaginal

[Nycchick]

Just oral so far for me

How many different guys have you given too? Oldest?

[OwlBlue]

Disadvantages, i don't think so, never did it but vaginal sex is much better in my opinion.

[stoneflowe96]

First vaginal, then a bit later oral. Anal most recently, but I don't know if I would do that with a boy.

[gurquenjen]

First oral for me, then...I think I did anal (and loved it, still a big fan) like a week before vaginal.

[Gabrielle1]

I have only done vaginal

How old were you and how old was he?

[Emma04]

How old were you and how old was he?

We were both 14

[Gabrielle1]

We were both 14

Nice sounds like you two had fun ;)

[Anna Kadlecova]

I have only done vaginal

It means that you never did oral sex?

[Emma04]

It means that you never did oral sex?

Yes I have also done oral

[Emilyfox]

Just oral so far for me

Mostly oral for me, isn’t it awesome?

Have been having sex recently though

[Nycchick]

How many guys have you given oral to?

[Nycchick]

Mostly oral for me, isn’t it awesome?

Have been having sex recently though

How many guys have you given oral to?

[Emilyfox]

How many guys have you given oral to?

<10
I’m a good girl

[Nycchick]

<10
I’m a good girl

Lol I wish I could be good.

[Emilyfox]

Lol I wish I could be good.

Lol I don’t know how many would change that
It’s fun. They love it. No one gets hurt. It’s special and sexy

I think more sex-ed programs should teach and encourage it
Would prevent a lot of problems

[Nycchick]

Lol I don’t know how many would change that
It’s fun. They love it. No one gets hurt. It’s special and sexy

I think more sex-ed programs should teach and encourage it
Would prevent a lot of problems

Do allow facials? Spit swallow etc

[Emilyfox]

Do allow facials? Spit swallow etc

Sometimes but prefer to swallow
No mess/evidence

[Marisa1]

I really never did anal and I can't think of it. I mean I can't imagine it will be a pleasure.

[Nycchick]

Just oral so far for me

Do allow facials or swallow??

[Zandra]

Lol I don’t know how many would change that
It’s fun. They love it. No one gets hurt. It’s special and sexy

I think more sex-ed programs should teach and encourage it
Would prevent a lot of problems

Exactly I couldn’t agree more

[Zandra]

<10
I’m a good girl

Wow I’ve only done 1 and that’s my current bf

[Anna Kadlecova]

Sometimes but prefer to swallow
No mess/evidence

And did you try anal or vaginal intercouse?

[gymgurl]

hmm hj, fingering G, oral G, oral M, fingering M... then many more G in there lol

[Emilyfox]

And did you try anal or vaginal intercouse?

Yes vaginal
Anal I don’t want to talk about

[Mswimmer]

Yes vaginal
Anal I don’t want to talk about

Why not, was it a bad expirience

[Emilyfox]

Why not, was it a bad expirience

Yes it hurt a lot

[big-girls-dont-cry]

Do allow facials or swallow??

I always intend to swallow but usually i can only get some of it down. I have gotten it on my face but it was more or less by accident.

Guess i need more practice...lol

[ashleigh7]

I always intend to swallow but usually i can only get some of it down. I have gotten it on my face but it was more or less by accident.

Guess i need more practice...lol

I'm with you on this one:) i try and swallow...But it's comes faster than I can swallow :) which usually means it gets on my face and stuff:/
I guess they say practice make perfect;) ha!

[Nycchick]

I always intend to swallow but usually i can only get some of it down. I have gotten it on my face but it was more or less by accident.

Guess i need more practice...lol

How many different guys have you given oral too?

[Lorraine02]

Haven’t had anal but I want to try it out, I love ass play as well

[Lindsaylovesyou]

Yes it hurt a lot

This is what I’m worried about! My bf wants it but idk if I want to lol

[Hoopsgirl]

When you have given oral and say he finishes in your mouth, is it in your mouth when he cums or does he masturbate outside your mouth and then finishes?

[Nycchick]

When you have given oral and say he finishes in your mouth, is it in your mouth when he cums or does he masturbate outside your mouth and then finishes?

Tbh both. Depends on guy. I don’t mind either, one is just more messy. How many guys have you given oral to?

[Lindsaylovesyou]

When you have given oral and say he finishes in your mouth, is it in your mouth when he cums or does he masturbate outside your mouth and then finishes?

It’s in there usually

[Hoopsgirl]

Tbh both. Depends on guy. I don’t mind either, one is just more messy. How many guys have you given oral to?


Only one but I didn’t let him cum in my mouth

[Nycchick]

Haven’t had anal but I want to try it out, I love ass play as well

Will do anything, but hate that. Once and done

[Shaythen]

Never had anal, only vag, not really interested in anal though

[KateMarshal]

Never had anal, only vag, not really interested in anal though

And did you try oral?

[Shaythen]

Yes, sorry, oral first then vag

[Nycchick]

It’s in there usually

Ever given oral to a guy you just met at a party or out?

[Lindsaylovesyou]

Ever given oral to a guy you just met at a party or out?

Yeah

[Sailor Mars]

this whole thread is/was not puberty related :locked: