ATOMICskittles
March 16th, 2014, 05:58 PM
Okay so this will be long (pun not intended).
So I am/was openly gay. I went to school in a school in a community in which my family didn't fit in because were weren't in the same income bracket (in a lack of better words). It was a really rich community (Coronado, California) that was primarily populated by wealthy, white, Republican, Catholics. At school it was easy to be openly gay because there weren't many students and basically I had many friends who were all girls for support so you can basically say I was semi-popular because I was friends with popular girls. In sixth grade I discovered my sexuality for sure as gay but I wasn't ready to come out because it was always a looming thought since 2nd grade. As the year went on I just had a bunch of crushes. But then came along 7th grade and there was this one boy who when I first saw him I was in love at first site, we'll just call him B. B was white brunette with the most beautiful face ever, he had a god-carved face and the worlds most beautiful blue eyes that I've never seen more beautiful. It was (an still is) my largest crush ever, I just couldn't get over how cute and beautiful B was. I was obsessed with him. Now B was (and still is) a puzzle that I could never solve. I came out that year to another friend and to many, he found out that I was gay and throughout that whole year, I thought that B was gay to because I would catch him glancing at me and such even before I came out. This was consistent throughout the year, and I did like another guy who was blond and had a twin but that's a different story ;). Then came along 8th grade (currently), this year I was ready to fly you can say and I was completely ready so I decided to be openly gay with the whole school. I could finally fully let out the ultra-gay in me and I was a flaming gay. There was no cons to it and life was better. I was in with the populars and I loved it. This also was the year my love for B was at its height, or peak. I just loved him soooooo much and my obsession grew. This year I was the closest to him and I really thought he was gay too. I would catch him looking at me, sometimes staring, in math class. I would stare back and such and we would have the most limited conversation. B just gave off the vibe like he was interested, his actions (and there are sooooo many more that I won't say but there were) just said he was. I would catch his flirts and such. As the year went on I obsessed over B more and more until one day, I got his number from a friend. My friend and I devised this elaborate plan and she texted him to text me (a number he didn't know) that I needed the homework from class. He did and then I said it was me and he turned to one word answers and in the end, B replied with "No and don't ever text me again". To this day I feel I should have replied with something more nippy than "okay" to that but I was heartbroken. But the bitch (excuse my language) continued to flirts and stare at school. In the end I had to move from that school because I moved out of the community (hence not being I the same income bracket) and I had to leave the school because there weren't any inter-district transfers open. I now go to a new school and I still miss him regardless of what he did. I still miss all of my friends so much. I I'm trying g to forget him and live on but I do still feel emotions for him and feel something on the lines of love and anger together. I still have the same question of wether not he is gay, he was like that with me and is touchy-feelly with the blond twins I mentioned before who are also beautiful. He had something with me and I know even my friends said the same and they said (and I myself think) that I am pretty cute so he had to have had something. They all said I deserved more than him because he was cocky and a jerk asshole at times. I don't know why I'm talking about this but reply if you have any thoughts. Thanks for reading my lonnnnnngggggg post. I still can't decide if he's gay and would explain if you need me too.
So I am/was openly gay. I went to school in a school in a community in which my family didn't fit in because were weren't in the same income bracket (in a lack of better words). It was a really rich community (Coronado, California) that was primarily populated by wealthy, white, Republican, Catholics. At school it was easy to be openly gay because there weren't many students and basically I had many friends who were all girls for support so you can basically say I was semi-popular because I was friends with popular girls. In sixth grade I discovered my sexuality for sure as gay but I wasn't ready to come out because it was always a looming thought since 2nd grade. As the year went on I just had a bunch of crushes. But then came along 7th grade and there was this one boy who when I first saw him I was in love at first site, we'll just call him B. B was white brunette with the most beautiful face ever, he had a god-carved face and the worlds most beautiful blue eyes that I've never seen more beautiful. It was (an still is) my largest crush ever, I just couldn't get over how cute and beautiful B was. I was obsessed with him. Now B was (and still is) a puzzle that I could never solve. I came out that year to another friend and to many, he found out that I was gay and throughout that whole year, I thought that B was gay to because I would catch him glancing at me and such even before I came out. This was consistent throughout the year, and I did like another guy who was blond and had a twin but that's a different story ;). Then came along 8th grade (currently), this year I was ready to fly you can say and I was completely ready so I decided to be openly gay with the whole school. I could finally fully let out the ultra-gay in me and I was a flaming gay. There was no cons to it and life was better. I was in with the populars and I loved it. This also was the year my love for B was at its height, or peak. I just loved him soooooo much and my obsession grew. This year I was the closest to him and I really thought he was gay too. I would catch him looking at me, sometimes staring, in math class. I would stare back and such and we would have the most limited conversation. B just gave off the vibe like he was interested, his actions (and there are sooooo many more that I won't say but there were) just said he was. I would catch his flirts and such. As the year went on I obsessed over B more and more until one day, I got his number from a friend. My friend and I devised this elaborate plan and she texted him to text me (a number he didn't know) that I needed the homework from class. He did and then I said it was me and he turned to one word answers and in the end, B replied with "No and don't ever text me again". To this day I feel I should have replied with something more nippy than "okay" to that but I was heartbroken. But the bitch (excuse my language) continued to flirts and stare at school. In the end I had to move from that school because I moved out of the community (hence not being I the same income bracket) and I had to leave the school because there weren't any inter-district transfers open. I now go to a new school and I still miss him regardless of what he did. I still miss all of my friends so much. I I'm trying g to forget him and live on but I do still feel emotions for him and feel something on the lines of love and anger together. I still have the same question of wether not he is gay, he was like that with me and is touchy-feelly with the blond twins I mentioned before who are also beautiful. He had something with me and I know even my friends said the same and they said (and I myself think) that I am pretty cute so he had to have had something. They all said I deserved more than him because he was cocky and a jerk asshole at times. I don't know why I'm talking about this but reply if you have any thoughts. Thanks for reading my lonnnnnngggggg post. I still can't decide if he's gay and would explain if you need me too.