BenjiJoelCorrea
August 13th, 2018, 09:26 PM
Alrighty so I'm not 100% sure if this is where this is supposed to go, and I was really hesitant on putting this out there. haha but it's been kind of bothering me lately and I needed to vent it out
I fell for one of the members in my dance group back when I first joined in 2016. Like I literally had a thing for him instantly... one of those typical "I've had a thing for you since I first saw you" things. My first year of knowing him was rather awkward, I had just started getting used to the group and socializing in general (I had an experience prior to joining that kind of made me shut the world out for awhile) anyway so in the first year of being in the group, I got comfortable with literally everyone except for him (because I found it so hard to approach him) but I built up the courage and eventually started making awkward attempts at conversations with him... and we'd talk every now and then.. but we weren't really that close
Long story short, December of 2016 we had a performance the week before christmas... and I decided that my christmas present to him would be bath bombs (those were his favorite) and that I'd give him a card with my feelings for him written in it. I did give him that gift and he was really happy about it, after our performance we changed and he left.. I gave him a hug and all of that, it was cute.... the rest of us were partying in our hotel room... and then the worst night of my life happened: I got a call saying that my sister had lost her baby, and then a few moments later I received a text from my crush with his response to my letter.
he had basically told me that he really wasn't capable of feeling anything romantic towards anyone at the current moment and that he just saw me as his teammate and he called me a really great and attractive guy with a lot going for me and he hoped this wouldnt effect anything. I told him it would and texted him like normal the next day and I got myself comfortable again with him (mind you I was a mess though from the news I was given about my sisters baby)
That was the first time I confessed to him (lol you guys this has a lot of backstory)
Fast forward to January/February of 2017 and we're back from our little holiday break, I see him and I act like if nothing happened and from then on we start building our friendship again... this time we got a lot closer to each other and we really bonded a lot. My feelings for him were pretty much gone so it was really easy to interact with him again.... then in april of that year.. my other friend tells me that the guy I confessed to has started thinking of me as cute in a romantic way... and I was like "oh crap... no don't tell me that because I just got over him"
and then the crush came back little by little.. in May at another competition we were at.. he started acting different towards me.. more touchy and always by my side.... he had an incident with someone else interested in him at this party we were at and got upset (this part of the story is way too long to explain, but long story short he told this guy he wasn't interested but the other guy kept trying to touch him and stuff) and went to the hotel room we were staying in, he texted me and asked for me and when I asked him if he wanted me to come back, he said he was okay and that he talked to my other friend about it
another incident at a different party that night was that I got overwhelmed by the amount of people and told a couple of my friends I was gonna walk around, and I went and did that and he apparently freaked out and came looking for me.. then lectured me for going alone.
Anyway there were more moments between us that felt like him flirting with me and a thing were he was rubbing my chest because my shirt was open the day of my birthday and then I confessed again that same year and he gave me the same reply as the last time but it confused the hell out of me.. and then he moved away to school and moved back here this year.
Finally we're at what's happening currently and it is all following the same pattern, he came back this january and we've started to rebuild our friendship again... now we're even closer than before and he's become someone really important in my life (i mean he's always been) we've started talking like everyday and it seems like we're flirting again? like he gives me really tight hugs and we have little competitions with who can hug the tightest and our hugs last awhile... we have deep talks every time he takes me home... and just recently on my birthday he spoiled the hell out of me... he bought me a shirt to match with his and he paid for my dinner and wrote me a cute letter in my birthday card, saying he appreciates what we have in a whole new way.. and it's like oh my god are you flirting with me? what do you want from this?
It's a really confusing situation but this time I'm just trying to go with the flow and see where this leads rather than being the first to spill my feelings again... because it feels like he does feel something for me but he's holding back?
It's been this constant loop of him acting very flirty with me some times and cold to me other times.
I need advice on this, It's something that I've had issues with for a little bit and I really need some help on how to handle this.
I fell for one of the members in my dance group back when I first joined in 2016. Like I literally had a thing for him instantly... one of those typical "I've had a thing for you since I first saw you" things. My first year of knowing him was rather awkward, I had just started getting used to the group and socializing in general (I had an experience prior to joining that kind of made me shut the world out for awhile) anyway so in the first year of being in the group, I got comfortable with literally everyone except for him (because I found it so hard to approach him) but I built up the courage and eventually started making awkward attempts at conversations with him... and we'd talk every now and then.. but we weren't really that close
Long story short, December of 2016 we had a performance the week before christmas... and I decided that my christmas present to him would be bath bombs (those were his favorite) and that I'd give him a card with my feelings for him written in it. I did give him that gift and he was really happy about it, after our performance we changed and he left.. I gave him a hug and all of that, it was cute.... the rest of us were partying in our hotel room... and then the worst night of my life happened: I got a call saying that my sister had lost her baby, and then a few moments later I received a text from my crush with his response to my letter.
he had basically told me that he really wasn't capable of feeling anything romantic towards anyone at the current moment and that he just saw me as his teammate and he called me a really great and attractive guy with a lot going for me and he hoped this wouldnt effect anything. I told him it would and texted him like normal the next day and I got myself comfortable again with him (mind you I was a mess though from the news I was given about my sisters baby)
That was the first time I confessed to him (lol you guys this has a lot of backstory)
Fast forward to January/February of 2017 and we're back from our little holiday break, I see him and I act like if nothing happened and from then on we start building our friendship again... this time we got a lot closer to each other and we really bonded a lot. My feelings for him were pretty much gone so it was really easy to interact with him again.... then in april of that year.. my other friend tells me that the guy I confessed to has started thinking of me as cute in a romantic way... and I was like "oh crap... no don't tell me that because I just got over him"
and then the crush came back little by little.. in May at another competition we were at.. he started acting different towards me.. more touchy and always by my side.... he had an incident with someone else interested in him at this party we were at and got upset (this part of the story is way too long to explain, but long story short he told this guy he wasn't interested but the other guy kept trying to touch him and stuff) and went to the hotel room we were staying in, he texted me and asked for me and when I asked him if he wanted me to come back, he said he was okay and that he talked to my other friend about it
another incident at a different party that night was that I got overwhelmed by the amount of people and told a couple of my friends I was gonna walk around, and I went and did that and he apparently freaked out and came looking for me.. then lectured me for going alone.
Anyway there were more moments between us that felt like him flirting with me and a thing were he was rubbing my chest because my shirt was open the day of my birthday and then I confessed again that same year and he gave me the same reply as the last time but it confused the hell out of me.. and then he moved away to school and moved back here this year.
Finally we're at what's happening currently and it is all following the same pattern, he came back this january and we've started to rebuild our friendship again... now we're even closer than before and he's become someone really important in my life (i mean he's always been) we've started talking like everyday and it seems like we're flirting again? like he gives me really tight hugs and we have little competitions with who can hug the tightest and our hugs last awhile... we have deep talks every time he takes me home... and just recently on my birthday he spoiled the hell out of me... he bought me a shirt to match with his and he paid for my dinner and wrote me a cute letter in my birthday card, saying he appreciates what we have in a whole new way.. and it's like oh my god are you flirting with me? what do you want from this?
It's a really confusing situation but this time I'm just trying to go with the flow and see where this leads rather than being the first to spill my feelings again... because it feels like he does feel something for me but he's holding back?
It's been this constant loop of him acting very flirty with me some times and cold to me other times.
I need advice on this, It's something that I've had issues with for a little bit and I really need some help on how to handle this.