Accidentally discovered that my cousin was gay

[LexKhalil]

Hey everyone :)
I'm Alex, 14 years old from Lebanon.

I was at my grandma's house, my cousin (Let's call him J) had just left (He lives in France and he comes to visit us every once in a while). So I was searching for something unimportant when I saw a book that clearly belonged to J. Out of curiosity I opened it, and started going through the pages. It was his memories album. He travels a lot so he keeps important events and moments in that book.

Let's go straight to the point... I found a picture of J kissing a boy in a pride parade. I'm very open minded, so I'm okay with that. But I don't know what to tell him. I don't know if my family knows (Lebanese people don't accept gays). Should I tell him I saw that? How should I tell him?

Thanks for helping :)

[NewLeafsFan]

The way I see it, you should just keep the information to yourself. Telling him that you know would only make him uncomfortable and telling other ppl would create another problem.

[mick01]

If it were me who found my cousins book, I would let him know I had it in a safe place and tell him that I was fully supportive of him. He's probably worried sick about who will find it.

[lliam]

If I'd found this book, I wouldn't even have read it.

As others said above, stay covered and keep your mouth shut. You know it, you had no right to read this, nor is it of your concern whether your cousin is gay or not.


Not until he comes up with it sometime.


And if he never does, take it with you into the grave ... and if it takes 110 years.

I wish you a very long and fulfilling life.

[Zachary G]

There really isnt anything for you to say to him because in a sense you have invaded his privacy by going through the book. Its his business and nobody elses, when he is ready to let people know he will, but until then it would be best if you keep what you know to yourself.

[ska8er]

Hey everyone :)
I'm Alex, 14 years old from Lebanon.

I was at my grandma's house, my cousin (Let's call him J) had just left (He lives in France and he comes to visit us every once in a while). So I was searching for something unimportant when I saw a book that clearly belonged to J. Out of curiosity I opened it, and started going through the pages. It was his memories album. He travels a lot so he keeps important events and moments in that book.

Let's go straight to the point... I found a picture of J kissing a boy in a pride parade. I'm very open minded, so I'm okay with that. But I don't know what to tell him. I don't know if my family knows (Lebanese people don't accept gays). Should I tell him I saw that? How should I tell him?

Thanks for helping :)

Say Nothing-Really its none of ur business even
tho u found out by accident. Y make waves within
ur family. If he wants to tell u or anyone else its
up to him.

[Ben7]

Well to be technical, if you found this specific book somewhere that is more public within that house (as opposed to say, in a private drawer that belongs to someone else), but if you found it like lying around in plain sight or somewhere where another person could reasonably or easily find it, then I wouldn't say you are in the wrong for opening it and looking through it in your curiosity. But if you went through greater lengths to access this book (looking for it in more private or hidden places specifically for the purpose of trying to see it) then it might be more wrong, but I don't think you did that.

As for what to say or not, I would just tell your cousin that you have it and will keep it safe. That's it, don't tell him you saw any specific pictures of anything. Don't say anything else. If there is anything further that concerns him or embarrasses him, he may say something more to you. Or he may not if he doesn't care. But if I were in your position then I'd simply just let him know that you have it, nothing more.

[SethfromMI]

Keep the book in a safe place for him, but no, I would not say anything. If he wants to, then you can let him know you love and support him. but otherwise, don't cause any unnecessary trouble for him.

[mick01]

I'm surprised that just about everybody's advice is to just keep quiet and not say anything. If it was my book and I accidently left it at my grandmothers, and it showed that I was gay but my family is homophobic, I'd be freaking out about the book being found by the wrong person and being outed. If I had a cousin call me and say "hey chill, I have your book and no one else saw it, it's all good" I'd feel hugely relieved.

[ska8er]

I agree that if something was left out
By Accident and it was reveling some
thing that would cause an uproar with
friends or family then I would appreciate
that someone picked it up and let me know
bout it But if someone was looking through
my things and then opened something that
they shouldn't touch or read I would b angry.

[ShiveringScientist]

I agree with what everyone else has said, keep it in a safe place until you can give it back to him. either tell him you read it and that you wont tell anyone or i think the better option just tell him you didnt open it at all so he doesnt worry about it. its clearly something he doesnt want to get out and he knows the hate and abuse he'll get because of it, so do him a favor and keep it a secret. whether you're supportive of his choices isnt relevant, its not something that involves you and is personal to him.

[nathanlee]

Hide that book so noone can find it, and then tell your cousin where it is
I just wonder why did he left it in such unsafe place

[cinderfella]

You should really inform him that you have his book. I don't know if you should say that you know he is gay. Just tell him you have his book. Coming out is already hard but being yanked out of the closet to a homophobic family is no joke. I should know.