Bad Daughter?

[Ilove318]

I posted this a few days ago on this forum, but then I wanted to change the title, since it didn’t fit it that well. So:

Recently (in the last few months) my dad and I have grown really far apart, and I understand that happens in these years of life, but I can't help feeling I've done something wrong. I feel he expects too much from me. He really wants me to be like he was in high school, academically focused and uncaring about every other aspect of social life. He says it doesn't matter if you have no friends, you can go to the library. He just doesn't understand! I feel frustrated because I've told him this heaps of times: friends are important.

Everyone thinks I'm lazy, but I feel miserable (I have depression) and useless half the time. When I'm motivated, I do things I like, like writing or something. I feel he wants me to be another version of him, and I don't want to. He said I could plan an entire holiday if I transfer into the high school he wants, and that's great! But he and my mum don't respect how I want to live my life.

I know I sound like an ungrateful brat, but rather than the 5 star hotel and resorts, I want to stay in small motels in a village or something like that. They speak to me sarcastically calling me a 'backpacker' when that is something I honestly want to do.

I understand if they don't want to do that, and I won't force them, but I wish they would tell me nicely. Talking to my parents doesn't help because they have preconceived opinions on nearly every matter. I have also tried to bring my grandma to talk with them, but even her opinion doesn't change them.

Am I a bad daughter? Please help!!!

[Dmaxd123]

stuck between a rock and a hard place.

they are your parents & as long as you live under their roof I feel you should try to at least keep decent grades up

BUT I also feel that as we grow older we should have more opportunities to start going in the direction that we desire.

So I would say in high school try to maintain good grades but don't lose sight of your long term goals as after high school (or college) a job you love is worth a lot more than a job you absolutely hate but pays better

[Ilove318]

Thank you, and I am trying, but whatever I do is just never ‘perfect’. I get mostly A’s and sometimes B’s. Even full marks are ‘you need to keep this up because other people are working harder’

Like they don’t understand how HARD it is to keep going every day and how even something so simple like getting out of bed is painful. Every breath can be a war some days...

I wish they knew what they’re words and actions and facial expressions do to me. Seriously!

To be honest, I feel like giving up. I’m not even sure I will make it to the age of getting a job.

[jamie_n5]

You are not a bad daughter just a frustrated one. I agree with you that friends are a very important part of your life. Maybe if you really concentrate on your school work and get your grades up them maybe your parents will let you go out and do things with friends.

[Ilove318]

My grades are all A's and B's (mostly A's) and I have no real friends. I just want my parents to accept me and my personality and wishes. Thanks for all your help.