chickenwaffles
April 24th, 2018, 06:22 PM
Pretty long so bear with me. Would appreciate any insight on this.
So I moved to the other side of the world about two months ago. Before coming here, I was told by friends that I would have a 'great time', with much of that implying that I would be meeting all sorts of new people, sleeping around, and dating.
Well, I had been looking forward to all that until I met this girl a little over a month before I had to leave. She's the most amazing person and I fell in love. I know, a month doesn't seem like enough time to fall in love with someone but I know how I feel. Anyway, it was really 'doomed' from the start because we both knew I had to come here. And after a few months she leaves for another continent to pursue her studies.
We spent as much time together as possible and professed our love for each other, but I did have to leave her.
Now I'm here, and I miss her so much but it's hard because she and I are coping differently. We said we'd keep in touch and skype/facetime but she isn't ready to do either yet because she doesn't think she can handle hearing my voice just yet, which I understand. We're also each other's first (my first love, her first anything) and I told her that when she moves for her studies I want her to be happy, so if she finds someone she should pursue that and not deny herself of that. She said the same for me, and at the time I said I wanted no one else. That part is still true because I do love her and would do anything to be with her, but the circumstances are so out of our hands. We still talk now but it's lessened for the time being because she has exams and I don't want to distract her.
Anyway, I still love her and I intend on keeping my promises (we planned to visit this small town in France together,someday) but for right now... For the near/foreseeable future, we don't know when we're going to see each other again. And as much as I want to hold out for her, do I deny myself of all these other things too? Am I an awful person for thinking all this?
So I moved to the other side of the world about two months ago. Before coming here, I was told by friends that I would have a 'great time', with much of that implying that I would be meeting all sorts of new people, sleeping around, and dating.
Well, I had been looking forward to all that until I met this girl a little over a month before I had to leave. She's the most amazing person and I fell in love. I know, a month doesn't seem like enough time to fall in love with someone but I know how I feel. Anyway, it was really 'doomed' from the start because we both knew I had to come here. And after a few months she leaves for another continent to pursue her studies.
We spent as much time together as possible and professed our love for each other, but I did have to leave her.
Now I'm here, and I miss her so much but it's hard because she and I are coping differently. We said we'd keep in touch and skype/facetime but she isn't ready to do either yet because she doesn't think she can handle hearing my voice just yet, which I understand. We're also each other's first (my first love, her first anything) and I told her that when she moves for her studies I want her to be happy, so if she finds someone she should pursue that and not deny herself of that. She said the same for me, and at the time I said I wanted no one else. That part is still true because I do love her and would do anything to be with her, but the circumstances are so out of our hands. We still talk now but it's lessened for the time being because she has exams and I don't want to distract her.
Anyway, I still love her and I intend on keeping my promises (we planned to visit this small town in France together,someday) but for right now... For the near/foreseeable future, we don't know when we're going to see each other again. And as much as I want to hold out for her, do I deny myself of all these other things too? Am I an awful person for thinking all this?