Log in

View Full Version : Confused With A Side Of Gay?


Swimmer98
April 20th, 2018, 12:44 AM
Hey Guys!
Thought I'd drop some questions I had in here and see if this is a normal scenario or not. I've been on tinder for a bit here and there, I talk to girls and then kind of get bored? I always feel kinda of forced when I'm talking to girls even when I'm at parties. So, I decided to switch my search preferences and see if I found any guys that I liked. I've only had two relationships and they were both kind of ehh lol. I matched with this guy and instantly had a little crush, something that doesn't come very naturally with girls, I've always been able to tell if a guy was cute but with girls it was a struggle? To say the least I'm confused with my sexuality at the moment, and being a freshman in college isn't exactly helping not knowing what I like yet XD. Anyway, we matched and talked a bit, started messaging on snap and it kind of got hot and heavy to say the least. I'll leave out details so I don't get banned lol. We've been talking for a few weeks on snap and we have the "best friends" heart and etc... I've started to feel like I'm falling for him? I've mentioned if he wanted to slow down or stop talking to me I'd understand just to give him a chance to dip if he wanted. He said he likes talking to me, but there are a few things that started bothering me lately, and thought I'd ask to see if I'm just nit picking or what. So he's kind of slow at replying which killllls me XD sometimes it'll take him a 4-6 hours to get a reply back and I'm not sure if he's ignoring it and waiting or if he's genuinely just busy. Since we have the best friends emoji I imagine he's just super slow sometimes. And we've been talking for a decent amount of time and we've both said we're both into each other and would be interested in a relationship, but I've been busy with finals coming up and he's going into his freshman year at a nearby university so he's trying to keep up with his senior year stuff. I checked my Tinder today and noticed like 4-5 days ago he updated one of his pictures and it kind of bothered me? Like I know we're not dating or anything and I guess exclusivity isn't a thing in this day and age but it kind of made me lose my confidence with him. I also should mention this might be a coincidence but either later that day or the next day I got black out drunk with friends and sent him a dick pic at like 3am? Which when I asked he said it was cute but I have no recollection and he said liked it. But like it kind of hurt? I mean I have my share of matches and people on snap but when we started really talking and picking it up I kind of slid off my other matches :/ I've never been this open with another guy so it's kind of scary and hard to think that someone I've made a connection with like this is still hunting around? And I don't want to bring it up to him and seem too clingy?

Anyway thanks for the advice guys, it's kind of nice just to share it with someone because I can't talk to my friends at school about it. It's just hard because I think I genuinely care about him a lot and don't know what to do
:(

It's hard trying to figure myself out, while not being sure if the other person feels the same way.

tl;dr
Thought I was straight, guess I'm not? Met a tinder guy a year younger than me, interested in me. We hit it off, gets a bit heavy on snapchat XD. We talk everyday and have the "best friends" emoji, but I've lost some confidence with him? I noticed he updated his tinder pictures a few days ago? Am I being too much? Do I risk telling him how I feel? When it’s hard to even admit my feelings to myself.

Alumni
April 20th, 2018, 02:16 AM
Well, it's understood why you'd be upset, I guess the question is; have you solidified him as your partner? Are you guys literally dating or are you playing games?

Anyone can play Super Mario Sunshine (I'm referencing flirting in case you're lost here lol), but only some people can take it up a notch and really get to the end of the game (dating).

Swimmer98
April 20th, 2018, 01:10 PM
Haha, I get the reference, also that game is as pretty solid. And now i feel old lol. I see what you’re saying, I mean I’ve flrited around and picked it up with girls before. And the way we’ve been talking it just sounded like we’ve solidified it. Without getting too raunchy but the things we say normally you wouldn’t say with someone you just side flirt on snap with. I feel like that’s why I even asked him if he wanted to talk to me less or we could stop if he wanted, that was kind of my point in getting more serious. I’m not sure how to ask him without it coming out super awkward. Asking him if he’ll be mine in that way might just come off flirty?

I’m not sure lol, thanks for the advice :)

Well, it's understood why you'd be upset, I guess the question is; have you solidified him as your partner? Are you guys literally dating or are you playing games?

Anyone can play Super Mario Sunshine (I'm referencing flirting in case you're lost here lol), but only some people can take it up a notch and really get to the end of the game (dating).

Alumni
April 20th, 2018, 11:09 PM
Haha, I get the reference, also that game is as pretty solid. And now i feel old lol. I see what you’re saying, I mean I’ve flrited around and picked it up with girls before. And the way we’ve been talking it just sounded like we’ve solidified it. Without getting too raunchy but the things we say normally you wouldn’t say with someone you just side flirt on snap with. I feel like that’s why I even asked him if he wanted to talk to me less or we could stop if he wanted, that was kind of my point in getting more serious. I’m not sure how to ask him without it coming out super awkward. Asking him if he’ll be mine in that way might just come off flirty?

I’m not sure lol, thanks for the advice :)

If you feel that you both have a connection, why not try and lead into it?

Try to hint at it (make it a very hard hint) and then gradually move in.

jamie_n5
April 26th, 2018, 09:10 PM
Being honest and forthright is always the best way to go. I think you should express your true feelings and go from there.