Goodbye Alice :(

[benlodge123]

So Alice, the girl i liked, told me to leave her alone for a while. I was apparently to full on. I agree and thanked her for telling me. But what pissed me off was the fact that I was always always there for her when she was upset, but whenever i told her my problems, she would come back and say "urgh I have a MASSIVE HEADACHE" she didn't like me talking about my problems.
Its been like this for the past few days and its really starting to get to me. I really wanted to meet her, so I would ask a lot, 1 time a day. She lost it and told me to leave her alone. So i removed her off of snapchat, I direct messaged her on instagram and told her that when she wanted to talk again she can add me back on snapchat. Then she posted on her private instagram account "Mental health is part of me, its not something that I choose to have. If you cant deal with it then the easiest option is to walk away, and do you know what that makes you? Uncommited and cowardice" I am so confused right now. She told me to walk away but that makes me uncommited and cowardice, yet I live with mental health problems and was always trying to make her feel better. Doesn't matter how hard I try, I get kicked in the fucking balls all the time. I've tried walking away, but then I come across as "uncommited and cowardice" I've tried talking to her, she just tells me to leave her alone.

My head is fucked up man. I really want to be friends with her, but if she is telling me to leave her alone, thats a clear sign to back the fuck off.

What would you do in this situation?

[mick01]

You need to back off for a while dude. Just leave it be for a while.

[benlodge123]

You need to back off for a while dude. Just leave it be for a while.

I am. My mates say I should remove her completely because they know how much it is ariating me.

[Uniquemind]

I think you should emotionally distance yourself from her, but continue to do the motions of caring like a flower here or there.


This doesn't seem like a "lend a listening ear" situation, it's one of those situations where the guy had to read between the lines.

In this case if be more gently persistent in flirting, build the tension up, and if you guys find a situation where your hooking up, that's when the tension let's loose especially I think on the guy's side.


But mental health complicates things here.

[benlodge123]

I think you should emotionally distance yourself from her, but continue to do the motions of caring like a flower here or there.


This doesn't seem like a "lend a listening ear" situation, it's one of those situations where the guy had to read between the lines.

In this case if be more gently persistent in flirting, build the tension up, and if you guys find a situation where your hooking up, that's when the tension let's loose especially I think on the guy's side.


But mental health complicates things here.

What do you mean by emotionally distance yourself here? So stay friends with her but don't be persistent in talking to her, but also be there if she has a problem. I also dont understand what you mean by "This doesn't seem like a "lend a listening ear" situation, it's one of those situations where the guy had to read between the lines."

yesterday was valentines day, she went out for a meal with a boy who she said "was like my brother" dont know about you but i wouldnt wanna date someone im that close with. She also said to me she didnt want a relationship with anyone until after her exams, but she still goes for a meal ? I dont understand her.

Mental health is the root of this problem. It causes me to overreact so much.

[NewLeafsFan]

You need to walk away. Not because she asked you to, but to keep this girl from making you insane. I hope that you've realized that having a healthy relationship with this girl isn't going to happen. Concentrate your efforts on more important people.

[Uniquemind]

What do you mean by emotionally distance yourself here? So stay friends with her but don't be persistent in talking to her, but also be there if she has a problem. I also dont understand what you mean by "This doesn't seem like a "lend a listening ear" situation, it's one of those situations where the guy had to read between the lines."

yesterday was valentines day, she went out for a meal with a boy who she said "was like my brother" dont know about you but i wouldnt wanna date someone im that close with. She also said to me she didnt want a relationship with anyone until after her exams, but she still goes for a meal ? I dont understand her.

Mental health is the root of this problem. It causes me to overreact so much.


With that new information I think she lied to you, or she's doing this to get a rise out of you. Just stop caring about what she does, she is definitely testing you and playing hard to get.

[ska8er]

Give her some space.

[benlodge123]

Give her some space.

I am starting from today, we spoke yesterday on ft, it was great, because she actualy said "tonight i want to talk to you and only you" i melted <3 but today, she became bitchy. Her friend said something about me and she then began taking the piss out of me. :( I will give her some space.

[ska8er]

Something might just b on her mind
and its troubling her. Give her some
time. :)

[benlodge123]

Something might just b on her mind
and its troubling her. Give her some
time. :)

here is what she told me yesterday "okay so my brother is coming home from Australia in May and then going back for 2 years in August. My mum, dad and grandad are all arguing. i need attention from my mum but she is to much into arguing and wont give me it."

I replied and all was well.

[Uniquemind]

here is what she told me yesterday "okay so my brother is coming home from Australia in May and then going back for 2 years in August. My mum, dad and grandad are all arguing. i need attention from my mum but she is to much into arguing and wont give me it."

I replied and all was well.

Well that explains a lot of her emotional deficits, parents not providing enough of an emotional supportive foundation for development is the cause of many teen-adult emotional stability problems later in life.


Also don’t assume the guy she did have a meal with is romantic either, she might have just been hanging out with a friend. It’s not like you saw them kissing or engaged in romantic-sexual behavior.

[benlodge123]

Well that explains a lot of her emotional deficits, parents not providing enough of an emotional supportive foundation for development is the cause of many teen-adult emotional stability problems later in life.


Also don’t assume the guy she did have a meal with is romantic either, she might have just been hanging out with a friend. It’s not like you saw them kissing or engaged in romantic-sexual behavior.


It wasn’t a romantic dinner, it was her parents, his parents and her friend from school all just having a family meal. She didn’t say tho until after she was home

[WeebOOF]

I think you should distance from her for a bit then maybe talk to her when things have settled

[benlodge123]

I think you should distance from her for a bit then maybe talk to her when things have settled

How long do you think I should leave it?

[WeebOOF]

How long do you think I should leave it?

Maybe a few weeks or a month at the latest, it will let things settle and then you both might be in the right mood to talk it out, i did this once and it worked.

[Uniquemind]

How long do you think I should leave it?

Studies about psychological human grieving patterns is approximately 6 months as an average after a breakup.