i just want some fucking peace

[Babs]

lllll

[ska8er]

What does ur Dad have to say bout this? All I
can say is that he is the one that is the main
head of house and is bringing in the income-he
should b responsible of trying to bring calm to
ur house. The two of u should get together to
get her help. This could b that she is depressed.

[jamie_n5]

You need to talk to your dad and team up and get her intervention and you could go to social services and your county attorney and get her committed to a mental institution for alcoholism and mental illness. She definitely needs the help. You need to intervene.

[Babs]

You need to talk to your dad and team up and get her intervention and you could go to social services and your county attorney and get her committed to a mental institution for alcoholism and mental illness. She definitely needs the help. You need to intervene.
Getting her forcibly committed might sound like a decent solution if you don't have the full picture, but it's honestly not. The family has done what we can to intervene, but she needs to get help voluntarily. I think she's slowly coming to terms with it all. She has made some positive life changes since last year, such as exercising more. She lost 60 pounds in a year. Like I said, she needs to make the decision herself. It's not like she's totally out of touch with reality. Otherwise, if I didn't think she was making positive changes, I might agree that an intervention of that magnitude would be necessary.

What does ur Dad have to say bout this? All I
can say is that he is the one that is the main
head of house and is bringing in the income-he
should b responsible of trying to bring calm to
ur house. The two of u should get together to
get her help. This could b that she is depressed.
I've never personally had a conversation with my dad about it. But based on what I've heard about conversations my siblings have had with him, he is fully aware of her problems (he knows better than anyone else) and respects that his kids don't want to tolerate her bs. he's just doing what he thinks is right by handling the situation very delicately. He's just trying to keep her happy.

In regards to what both of these posts have said about getting her help: she knows our opinion about her mental health. Now it's up to her and to a lesser extent my dad to get her help. I am not qualified to "team up" to get her help, I am not qualified to tell her what to do or to talk to doctors. The most I can do, as somebody who does have the whole picture, is offer my honesty.

[Babs]

so you know how i mentioned that i would be moving out in around a year

turns out i'm moving like, this week. the opportunity has fallen into my lap and i'm gonna take it because i have nothing to lose. this arose after a very long terrible interaction with my mom during a 30 minute car ride during which she was driving extremely dangerously, talking mad shit about me and my dad. there's construction on one of the main roads in town and i was trying to describe the best detour around it and she didn't think i was doing an adequate job so she was yelling something along the lines of "i can't handle you today. not today. you're not as helpful as you think you are. i can't deal with you today." and then low-key threatened to kill me and i'm only 90% sure that she was joking.

so yeah i'm moving the fuck out. pretty good timing.

[NewLeafsFan]

Your mother is an alcoholic. Any other mental issues including loneliness and negative emotions is steaming from that.

Unfortunately, alcoholics (like any other addicts) often need to hit a rock bottom before they need help. To hit a rock bottom things have to change and get worse before they will get better. I recommend that you and your siblings get out of that toxic environment asap. You, your siblings, and most importantly, your father needs to be educated on these issues. Contact AA for help with that. In order for ur mother to change your father may need to get out of her life for a short period of time. I also recommend looking at videos of the tv show intervention.

I don't believe that your mom has no idea that there's a problem even if she acts like it a lot of the time. She sees how she acts and drinks compared to that of the people around her.

[Just JT]

Emotional abuse is one of the worst kinds of abuse. It shows virtually no signs or symptoms and the wounds are the deepest imo.

People with addiction issues can’t be helped without wanting that help. All you can do is help yourself. So good for you.

If possible, after you get yourself set up in your new place I’d probably (when you’re ready) reach out to Mom and Dad and see if you can help them or something. Maybe talk to moms doctor on your own about her behavior etc. her doctor may not be able to say much to you, but he/she can and should listen to you

I wish you the best of luck. I’m sure you’ll be really happy in your new place. Get some rest and peace

[AussieNicholas]

so you know how i mentioned that i would be moving out in around a year

turns out i'm moving like, this week. the opportunity has fallen into my lap and i'm gonna take it because i have nothing to lose. this arose after a very long terrible interaction with my mom during a 30 minute car ride during which she was driving extremely dangerously, talking mad shit about me and my dad. there's construction on one of the main roads in town and i was trying to describe the best detour around it and she didn't think i was doing an adequate job so she was yelling something along the lines of "i can't handle you today. not today. you're not as helpful as you think you are. i can't deal with you today." and then low-key threatened to kill me and i'm only 90% sure that she was joking.

so yeah i'm moving the fuck out. pretty good timing.

Glad that you're getting out of that environment. Nobody should have to deal with this shit especially when you guys are trying to start building lives of your own. Once you've moved out and set up I think it might be best to cut yourself off from her, and make it clear to her that she needs to change if she wants any part in your life. Putting you in danger like that is way too far and you've got no obligation to keep someone that toxic in your life.

I hope that moving out turns out well for you.