Sasw
July 26th, 2017, 07:25 AM
So my best friend has been having frequent relationship issues ever since. Every time she’s had an issue she’s always come to me for advice.
So what happened was, she was on and off with this guy who was also one of her best friends and she really didn’t know how she felt. I carefully considered what she told me and how great they got along and I decided to tell her to try things with him again because at the time, they seemed to want to both get back into a relationship.
Unfortunately, as their relationship progressed, they had a few occurrences of mistrust and misunderstanding but I was confident that they were able to fix these small issues because of their great bond. I personally was not fond of the guy because we had gone to the same primary school and we hadn’t particularly gotten along well but I disregarded this for the sake of my best friend.
It was as of recently though that I wanted to check up on her and ask her how things were going with her relationship so as it always happened, we were sitting in maccas having lunch after school having deep chats. I asked her how their relationship was going and she said she was happy with her boyfriend but I wasn’t convinced. I inconsiderately (I admit this) pressed on and asked her if she was really happy and she said she was, but she didn’t think her relationship with the guy was healthy because she felt her happiness depended on him and she didn’t like that. She also said that she felt like she was holding back and not telling me the whole story so she invited me over to hers for drinks that Saturday to see if she could give me the true story without holding back and I accepted her invitation.
On our way home, we still continued our deep conversation and she explained to me how bad she felt for doubting her relationship and doubting if she was prepared to be in a relationship and I naturally comforted her and told her to clear her mind out and that we would figure it out on that Saturday. Later that night though, she texted me screenshots of texts between herself and her boyfriend. It was basically them arguing as to if they wanted to continue their relationship as she personally didn’t think she was happy for the right reasons. It got to the point though that he asked her if she wanted to break up. I then told her it was her choice as to what she wanted to do and left her with the freedom to decide what she wanted. Don’t get me wrong though, all my disagreement aside, this guy was amazing to her and I was more than happy with the way he treated my best friend, but at that point she ultimately decided to break up with him.
I now feel extremely bad for what has happened because I feel as if I’m at fault for all of this because I kind of let her doubt their relationship.
So my question is, did I ruin their relationship? Was it bad that I got her doubting her relationship, even if this is not the result I was after?
So what happened was, she was on and off with this guy who was also one of her best friends and she really didn’t know how she felt. I carefully considered what she told me and how great they got along and I decided to tell her to try things with him again because at the time, they seemed to want to both get back into a relationship.
Unfortunately, as their relationship progressed, they had a few occurrences of mistrust and misunderstanding but I was confident that they were able to fix these small issues because of their great bond. I personally was not fond of the guy because we had gone to the same primary school and we hadn’t particularly gotten along well but I disregarded this for the sake of my best friend.
It was as of recently though that I wanted to check up on her and ask her how things were going with her relationship so as it always happened, we were sitting in maccas having lunch after school having deep chats. I asked her how their relationship was going and she said she was happy with her boyfriend but I wasn’t convinced. I inconsiderately (I admit this) pressed on and asked her if she was really happy and she said she was, but she didn’t think her relationship with the guy was healthy because she felt her happiness depended on him and she didn’t like that. She also said that she felt like she was holding back and not telling me the whole story so she invited me over to hers for drinks that Saturday to see if she could give me the true story without holding back and I accepted her invitation.
On our way home, we still continued our deep conversation and she explained to me how bad she felt for doubting her relationship and doubting if she was prepared to be in a relationship and I naturally comforted her and told her to clear her mind out and that we would figure it out on that Saturday. Later that night though, she texted me screenshots of texts between herself and her boyfriend. It was basically them arguing as to if they wanted to continue their relationship as she personally didn’t think she was happy for the right reasons. It got to the point though that he asked her if she wanted to break up. I then told her it was her choice as to what she wanted to do and left her with the freedom to decide what she wanted. Don’t get me wrong though, all my disagreement aside, this guy was amazing to her and I was more than happy with the way he treated my best friend, but at that point she ultimately decided to break up with him.
I now feel extremely bad for what has happened because I feel as if I’m at fault for all of this because I kind of let her doubt their relationship.
So my question is, did I ruin their relationship? Was it bad that I got her doubting her relationship, even if this is not the result I was after?