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View Full Version : Getting stuff off my chest


ChoiceScarf
February 25th, 2014, 06:26 PM
Okay so I'm going to keep this short, but I'm kinda seeing a pattern in my life, and I was wondering if anyone else had the same problem.

When I was younger my Dad just abandoned me and my mother and left us with basically nothing. He wasn't the best Dad either and even though I spent one summer holiday living in a car I was kinda glad he was gone. There has also been other stuff going on in my life, such as being really heavily bullied where I have had wax poured down my back and glass shards thrown at my face. Now I know what you might be saying, why is this relevant?

I have noticed a pattern in my life, when I make a friend sometimes I like them and they become very close to me. Eventually they may make a mistake or have an off day and I convince myself that they are a horrible person and make life difficult for everyone till the friendship either ends in an fight or just ends.

Recently I have made friends with someone who is quite pushy and keen to help me, which I find is a good thing because he has made me realise some of these problems and issues I am having. He takes me to the gym, he asks me questions about my life, ect. But recently I have been trying to find holes in him and I don't know how to stop. I keep trying to convince myself he actually hates me. And I don't want to be like this anymore, its not fair on him. But I don't know if some of you will understand that these negative thoughts can be quite powerful and can take over your life.

I do have other friends so don't think it's just him, but he is like the closest person too me in my friendship group. But I don't really understand but opening up to him makes me feel vulnerable and weak but he is so pushy to get me to talk most of the time. But I fear I may say to much and he thinks I'm too crazy for him to be friends with me. I get it i'm paranoid.

I know it seems whiny, but if anyone has any suggests or advice that will be really helpful thank you!

Karkat
February 25th, 2014, 07:30 PM
I think you might have a fear of abandonment, so you're trying to keep others at arms' length so they can't hurt you, and you're overly critical for the same reason.

Personally I don't know what to say other than try to catch yourself when you're doing it. Calm down, and ask yourself "is this rational?" Or take your mind off of it for a bit, come back and try to see what happened.

ChoiceScarf
February 26th, 2014, 04:08 PM
Thanks for the reply!

Yeah that is exactly what I feel probably, I do hate to be alone. I will try your advice, but it is difficult when all those thoughts are rushing around your head! But I guess I need to try to be more aware.

Would telling him this problem help? I don't know if it will make me seem to crazy or attached though :/