Are my sexual expectations out of line?

[scott2002]

My gf and I are both 15 and in 9th grade. This is the first either of us has had what you'd call an "official" bf/gf relationship with someone, and we've been bf/gf for 3 months now. She tells me that she thinks I'm "hot" and "sexy" and that I turn her on. I definitely feel the same way about her. But the problem is, she won't allow me to do anything more than kiss her, or touch her breasts outside of her clothes. Three months and no clothes have been removed, unbuttoned, unzipped, or reached inside. Nothing.
My body is going CRAZY because we are still this way, and it has become very frustrating for me. Now 3 months into a relationship, I want to, I feel I need to, be a little more physically intimate with her. I'm not looking for intercourse, I just want her to allow me to see and touch what she has inside her shirt, and have her see and touch what I have inside my pants.
Am I being unreasonable? I have friends that are doing that much after a week, and I don't think I'm unreasonable. I'm seriously now thinking of calling it quits with her and moving on because of it. I like her, but...

[Phosphene]

Whoa, stop right there. Call it quits? You need to respect her wishes. Just because you're ready for more doesn't mean she's comfortable with doing more. If you really like her, you'll stay with her. You don't just walk up to someone you want to get into a relationship with and ask, "If we were to be together, what are your expectations for the physical aspect of our relationship?" and walk off because you're not happy with that. It just doesn't work that way.

I think 3 months is too soon. That's not enough time to get to know/connect with someone on a deep enough level to build up the trust to have a sexual relationship.

[ska8er]

Ur asking too much too soon and she is
not ready for that sort of thing. When the
time is right it will happen so don't pressure
her. U r unreasonable if u expect this right
away. U have a good girl-keep her and not
think bout moving on to someone who is
only interested in what she can get from u.
Seems this is the way u think and this does
not make a good relationship.

[Jinglebottom]

I have friends that are doing that much after a week, and I don't think I'm unreasonable.
Don't you think one week is just a wee bit early? :confused:

[Mrstealyourgirl11]

I mean just open up to her and tell her she would feel the same way and she would want u to but just talk to her in relationships conversation and honestly is t

[ClaraWho]

Call it quits with her. You just want sex and she wants a meaningful relationship. TBH she deserves better. You'll find someone else willing to be sexual with you, literally anyone can find that. Next time just be upfront about what you want. Remember to use protection, kids shouldn't be having kids.

~ Clara

[zzzzzzzzzz]

As in any relationship, does she know how you feel. Have you talked your feelings with her and seen it from her way. Some do see a week as normal. Given half the chance, there's some girls (and boys I think I'm BI) that I would do it with very quickly. Others feel that there is more to a relationship than just the physical side. You need to see what she wants out of the relationship too. I hope it's not too different from what you want and you can work things out

[mick01]

It seems to me that you are really anxious to have some sort of physical relationship with a girl. In your other posts, you say you think you're 100% straight now after messing with guys some. I think you really want to have sex with a girl for whatever reason. SO, if I were you, I'd call it quits with your girlfriend because, at least at this point in time, she can't meet your needs. Find another girl who can satisfy what you seem to be looking for now.

[Zachary G]

I understand that your body is aching and you have cravings for more, but if you really care for her, you have to respect her wishes. Just be patient, take what you can get, and the rest will fall in place in time.

[Elysium]

I agree with what everyone has said so far. You're only fifteen and you've only been dating for three months. Take it slow.

[Barbara.]

My gf and I are both 15 and in 9th grade. This is the first either of us has had what you'd call an "official" bf/gf relationship with someone, and we've been bf/gf for 3 months now. She tells me that she thinks I'm "hot" and "sexy" and that I turn her on. I definitely feel the same way about her. But the problem is, she won't allow me to do anything more than kiss her, or touch her breasts outside of her clothes. Three months and no clothes have been removed, unbuttoned, unzipped, or reached inside. Nothing.
My body is going CRAZY because we are still this way, and it has become very frustrating for me. Now 3 months into a relationship, I want to, I feel I need to, be a little more physically intimate with her. I'm not looking for intercourse, I just want her to allow me to see and touch what she has inside her shirt, and have her see and touch what I have inside my pants.
Am I being unreasonable? I have friends that are doing that much after a week, and I don't think I'm unreasonable. I'm seriously now thinking of calling it quits with her and moving on because of it. I like her, but...
I think you should respect her wishes and her as a person if you desire a relationship of romance and love instead of a sexual relationship. I maybe out of bound or sound harsh ,but if a new bf wanted to go further than what I'm comfortable with i probably tell him to find another.

[Dmaxd123]

call it quits... for her sake

or if you really like her, use your hand on yourself and enjoy her company when she is ready she will tell you but don't push anything as if you push her she agrees then regrets it you end up sitting at home using your hand without a gf

[Mollypop]

Am I being unreasonable? I have friends that are doing that much after a week, and I don't think I'm unreasonable. I'm seriously now thinking of calling it quits with her and moving on because of it. I like her, but...

She's a person, not an object. You're in a relationship with her, which means there's a give and take between the two of you. You clearly want something she's not ready for, so that means you have two choices. 1) you can follow her wishes and deal with not having what you want, but stay with her. 2) you can leave her and find someone who wants the same thing you do.

Every relationship has things you like and things you don't. You both have to want to be in it for it to continue, and that means you both have to decide you have enough things you do like and few enough things you don't. This is your decision to make here.

[hesaidhesaid]

HANG ON. HANG ON. HANG ON.
Slow down. Besides, it's half her relationship too. Give her some respect, man and then maybe you'll find other things you enjoy about each other that don't have to be sexually related. Relationships are not all about waiting for the minute that the clothes come off you know.

[Just JT]

I'm not gunna say quit but in reality, listen to what everyone is saying. You can not rush where someone is sexually. And if you do...that's a different topic ok?

If she's someone special to you, other that getting your dick wet, then let nature take its course. If you push it, you'll likely push away the best thing you ever came upon.

If getting off is your deal then masturbate and be done with it

Cause in the end you don't even know why (cause you didn't say) she won't go further.

Either it's you, what your doing, or a combos of that

Think hard about that one ok?

[drhalsey1]

As everyone else said, 3 months is for one, really soon, and two, you're also 15, so you don't need to be rushing into this, just wait until more than once of you is ready, it takes two for a relationship, and this doesn't seem like it should be an important enough thing to leave anyone about, imposed your are Only looking for the physical part, considering compromise is the center of actual relationships

[tyrickd]

Whoa, stop right there. Call it quits? You need to respect her wishes. Just because you're ready for more doesn't mean she's comfortable with doing more. If you really like her, you'll stay with her. You don't just walk up to someone you want to get into a relationship with and ask, "If we were to be together, what are your expectations for the physical aspect of our relationship?" and walk off because you're not happy with that. It just doesn't work that way.

I think 3 months is too soon. That's not enough time to get to know/connect with someone on a deep enough level to build up the trust to have a sexual relationship.

YOUR SOOOO RIGHT, listen to this person, your friends are doing what after a week, i wouldnt let that bother you and plus if u wait longer youll have a better experience because you no her. but my advice is to slow down tbh

[camille78]

You should learn to respect her emotions. Talk with her regarding your feelings. If you are planning to break up with her, then you will be at loss.
Having sex is not the only thing in a relationship. If you need a breakup then go for it.

[IzzyB]

Kinda like an echo chamber here, but yeah, take it easy. Not like I have a world of experience, but the wait could lead to a much better relationship, which is way better than just sex!

[shy_indian_chick]

I think the primary issue that you need to understand is that males and females think about sex very differently. For girls, sexual attraction is usually more based in emotional security, whereas for boys it's more of a physical/visual thing. If she's resisting, it's likely because she doesn't yet feel totally safe and comfortable with you - try to actually consider that and take her feelings into account and the relationship might work a bit better for both of you.

[Seraph]

I think you're taking it too early, I mean you've been partners for only three months, take some time.

I and my partner have known each other since birth and have been in a relationship for about four years now. And it took me two years to get the first kiss, and still today we remain virgins. The first time I had seen her in her natural form was when I was 15, that is almost 17 months ago.

Time is a very essential thing, good things come to those who wait. I would suggest that you let time intervene and resist your temptation. Yes, I know, it is hard, but try to control it.

[ThatGuy_]

I've never been in a relationship, but I agree with everything other ppl said, if u want only sex then quit, if you love her don't let her go, don't rush it.

[SethfromMI]

I can understand the frustration, but no one should never be expected to do something they are uncomfortable with. end of story. if you love her for her, you will respect her and wait till she is ready. if you don't love her for her and are just with her hoping to do something with her, it is time to move on. it is not fair to her if you are just in it hoping to do something sexual with her. It can be ok to feel sexually frustrated about it, but if you love her, you will still respect her wishes

[Emilyyy]

Everyone moves at different speeds and especially it's the first time she's been in a proper relationship it may take her some time to get comfortable. Only thing you can really do is talk to her about how you feel and what you are thinking out. Go from there. Communicate, it's the key.

[messid]

My dad always told me that its better to wait because its more fulfilling when you wait...plus, shell enjoy it a lot more if shes ready and feels safe...which means that youll also enjoy it more and have a healthier relationship :D but if you REALLY REALLY cant wait and you just cant be around her without having sex then maybe youre sexually incompatible and should think about if you want to stay with her

[Anniebanannie]

My gf and I are both 15 and in 9th grade. This is the first either of us has had what you'd call an "official" bf/gf relationship with someone, and we've been bf/gf for 3 months now. She tells me that she thinks I'm "hot" and "sexy" and that I turn her on. I definitely feel the same way about her. But the problem is, she won't allow me to do anything more than kiss her, or touch her breasts outside of her clothes. Three months and no clothes have been removed, unbuttoned, unzipped, or reached inside. Nothing.
My body is going CRAZY because we are still this way, and it has become very frustrating for me. Now 3 months into a relationship, I want to, I feel I need to, be a little more physically intimate with her. I'm not looking for intercourse, I just want her to allow me to see and touch what she has inside her shirt, and have her see and touch what I have inside my pants.
Am I being unreasonable? I have friends that are doing that much after a week, and I don't think I'm unreasonable. I'm seriously now thinking of calling it quits with her and moving on because of it. I like her, but...

Scott, what did you end up deciding?

[JakeyZ]

Give her time. I personally don't think it's unreasonable to break up with someone if they can't give you what you want sexually, but you need to give her a lot longer to be ready.

[geanyna]

some of us are fast forward, others are a bit shy. you need to respect her and ask yourself if shes worth giving her time.

[Shiny Moon]

Sounds like she's not ready yet. And does she know how do you feel about it? It's important that you talk with her about it.

If after a few more months you feel that you need sex and she can't/doesn't want to give it to you, then in my opinion is time to move on and look for a relationship with someone who is willing to share more with you.

[NerdSquared]

I've had friends in relationships where they literally didn't kiss until two months in, everyone takes things at different speeds. And besides, first relationship, three months in, that seems a little unrealistic to expect it to move that fast (it happens, but it is rare). Just give her time. A relationship is a two-way thing. Not one-way.