Brother wants help

[Chuck bass]

My brother is twelve years old, and it's about that time when he is starting to be a teenager, so I guess his freinds have been talking about sex, masturbation, etc. My parents are really not comfortable with sex, so they have never given either of us "the talk". He keeps asking me to explain all this to him, but I don't know if it's my place. Has anyone been in a similar situation before? Suggestions?

[Zachary G]

Well, being an only child, I never had to go through what you are going through, but I can suggest that you go ahead and explain things to him as best you can. As a big brother, it kinda is your place to guide him into teenagerhood, especially if your parents will not do it. Youre all he has right now and I am sure you would rather him learn from you than from his friends and the internet. . . right? Be the big brother you would want to have if you were in his place.

[pjones]

My brother is twelve years old, and it's about that time when he is starting to be a teenager, so I guess his freinds have been talking about sex, masturbation, etc. My parents are really not comfortable with sex, so they have never given either of us "the talk". He keeps asking me to explain all this to him, but I don't know if it's my place. Has anyone been in a similar situation before? Suggestions?


no reason you can't talk to him. I do with my younger brother even though our dad is very approachable. there are websites that explain how a boy's body changes during puberty that maybe you can look at with him if you feel more comfortable that way. to me the most important parts is being honest with him. he'll probably ask you about masturbating and don't be ashamed to admit you do it as 99% of boys do. assuming you do of course. any other experiences you may have had aren't necessarily any of hi business so up to you if you want to discuss them.

my brother has told me several times how grateful his is that i helped answer his questions.

good luck

[Muk2000]

I think you should have a open discussion with your brother.

[DocMcLovins]

Ya why not. I wish I had a brother that would do that.

[Anniebanannie]

Especially since he's asking you, it would be the brotherly thing to do. Anything you don't know the answer to you can just say you don't know.

[jamie_n5]

I think as his brother you would do a much better job answering his questions with true and accurate answers instead of who knows what from friends and the street. I know I have talked lots with my little sister and answered many of her questions and curiosities. I would go ahead and try help him out. You can always go on the internet together for illustrations and answers too. Be a good big brother.

[ashdaniel]

Everyone is different. If you are comfortable just help him out. If you not comfortable, he will eventually find out. I help my younger cousin about this in the pass summer.

[mick01]

My older brother by 4 years has been a huge help to me since I was like 11 or 12. He talked to me and was open about a lot of stuff. Now I know I can talk to him about anything. And my little brother who is 12, he and I now have the same relationship. Man, do it. Talk to him so that he knows you two can talk about anything.

[zzzzzzzzzz]

I wish I had that. I hit puberty at 10 and was so confused!

[baseballhockey5]

I think it depends on how old you are; I'd help my brother in that situation.

[Straya]

if hes comfortable asking you questions and your parents wont answer them than yes i think you should answer what you can

[nekid]

You should do it. I don't have a brother but my older cousin answers any questions I have and that really helps me.

[Pitsirikos]

My parents were never open about sex and they didn't tell me anything. Hopefully my older sister did and I am really greatful to her for that. I am sure your brother will feel the same way if you talk with him and help him understand everything the best way.

[Muddy Sneakers]

agree with what others have said. but be careful not to go too fast. Your brother may be asking questions but he might still be too young to really understand everything so just take it step by step and make sure he and you are both OK with talking about stuff. But nothing wrong with it if you both are OK.

[Don Giovanni]

well someone have to teach him bro and you are the right person.

[Hermes]

It isn't your duty to explain things to your brother so if you are really uncomfortable you don't have to. I am sure he would appreciate it if you did, though. You don't have to give him a lecture, just answer his questions honestly.

[Poontang King117]

I think you should give him advice, he obviously trusts you. I learned a lot from my older nephews and older brothers about sex and puberty. I have helped my younger when he started puberty and was asking for advice it

[niklas]

As long as you and he are comfortable talking about it then there's no reason you can't. It might be a bit awkward at first if you've never talked about anything close before. My brother and I have talked about pretty much everything.

[Just JT]

Yes, I'd answer every question you can. Not knowing your age or anything but keep in mind even if he's asking, just explain what answers his curiousity ok. He may not be ready for everything. But could be to. Just be cool about it so when he's older he's secure in who he is and not afraid of it

[Eli.]

Why not? And if you don't want to, introduce him to this site.

[NewLeafsFan]

If I didn't know a lot of this stuff and I was 12 I think I'd appreciate having a big bro letting me in on a few things. Everyone should be given acurate information about sexual health, masturbation, ect.

It might not be your place but it isn't not your place either. Talking about stuff like that with your brother is normal. Are you worried that your parents will find out that you two are talking about this stuff? If so, I'm sure your parents talked with their siblings when they were teenagers too.

The bottom line is someone needs to step up to the plate. And if its not going to be your parents than I think you are the next in line.

[newyorker]

If you feel comfortable with it you should defiantly talk to him about it just tell him know he can ask you anything and not to be embarassed. Remember to be positive and casual and honest

[Second Chance]

My brother is twelve years old, and it's about that time when he is starting to be a teenager, so I guess his freinds have been talking about sex, masturbation, etc. My parents are really not comfortable with sex, so they have never given either of us "the talk". He keeps asking me to explain all this to him, but I don't know if it's my place. Has anyone been in a similar situation before? Suggestions?

I have been in a similar situation with my cousin, and I explained everything to him as questions came up. I think it is totally appropriate for you to talk about puberty to your brother, and at least he trusts you enough to ask you those kinds of question. It is far better you help him out and that you give him good advice than he going online and some creepy person taking advantage of him or learning the wrong stuff from his friends. It is best that you give your brother "the talk" and help him out because a lot of us who have younger siblings or cousins have done the same especially when we have parents like yours.

[garfield221]

Wish i had someone to guied me, and show me how to masturbate and other things

[SeansLittleBro]

i come from a family of 4 boys my twin and two older brothers even thought my twin and i are the youngest both our older brothers talked to us about puberty, masturbation, sex and answered any question we had. If i had a younger brother who was questioning things i would definitely try to talk to him about what was on his mind don't glorify anything just give him the facts to the questions that he may ask you be a good big brother and this will bond the two of you i'm sure for life

[Falcons_11]

I don't see any reason why shouldn't help out your little bro unless it would get you in trouble with your parents if they found out. You would be a better source of info than his friends.

[army martin]

I learned from my older bro.

[rvale22]

Yeah step in where you're parents definitely stepped out! Give youre little bro advice :)

[rvale22]

I wish my bro helped me and gave me advice

[countryplowboy]

It's amazing to be close with your brother!
Mine is 16 (I'm 14) he taught me all the fun stuff I can do with my dick. And we even have fun together...it's not sexual...it's just bonding. We are very close. I love him so much and thank him for being my best friend.

[the main man]

nothing wrong with teaching your bro the art of jerking off lol. but really, he needs to be taught about how to have safe sex by someone or it could ruin his life so i think you should talk to him.

[datboijoey]

My brother is twelve years old, and it's about that time when he is starting to be a teenager, so I guess his freinds have been talking about sex, masturbation, etc. My parents are really not comfortable with sex, so they have never given either of us "the talk". He keeps asking me to explain all this to him, but I don't know if it's my place. Has anyone been in a similar situation before? Suggestions?

You should so he does't learn bs.

[TWDjacob]

If your parents won't do it, you definitely should answer all his questions because that means he is comfortable with you and you can answer his questions correctly unlike the kids at school who might not know what they're talking about

[scott2002]

I'm an only-child, but when I was 11 and 12 I learned a lot about all of this through my same-age friend, who was taught all about it by his brother, who was 2 years older than us. So, indirectly, I suppose I learned a lot from "an older brother".

(For example, I knew that babies were made when the man's sperm fertilized the woman's egg. But how the sperm got out of the man and into the woman to get to the egg was a big mystery to us. My friend's older brother explained it all to us, and that he became able to squirt that stuff when he was almost 13, but boys that were our age can't squirt that stuff yet. And that this was why we got erections - so the man could squirt this stuff INTO a woman. It all then finally made sense.)

[DarkWish]

Go for it!
if he ask u something u should tell him... nothing wrong with that :)

[Yonah]

My 5 years older brother was a great help for me, and I will do the same with my younger brother when it's about time.

[Fourth]

You should explain it to him. Puberty can be confusing especially when there's so much wrong information floating around the internet and from his friends. It's better if he gets the information from someone that he trusts.

[scott2002]

You should explain it to him. Puberty can be confusing especially when there's so much wrong information floating around the internet and from his friends. It's better if he gets the information from someone that he trusts.

Since you're on VT, why not introduce HIM to this site? Maybe the two of you could scan through the puberty Q&A, or he could make his own sign-on and go on here by himself.

[ashdaniel]

I have been in a similar situation with my cousin, and I explained everything to him as questions came up. I think it is totally appropriate for you to talk about puberty to your brother, and at least he trusts you enough to ask you those kinds of question. It is far better you help him out and that you give him good advice than he going online and some creepy person taking advantage of him or learning the wrong stuff from his friends. It is best that you give your brother "the talk" and help him out because a lot of us who have younger siblings or cousins have done the same especially when we have parents like yours.

Same here man, I have been the similar situation with my younger cousin. I give the talks and show him stuff that he is curious. I taught him stuff.

[tyrickd]

i feel being open with him is the best thing u could do.

[kyle2003]

I would talk to him. I have fairly open parents. We can talk about anything and I feel comfortable doing so. I also have two older brothers. Even though I can talk to my parents I still like being able to talk to my brothers and getting answers from them. It is good bonding.