Is it technically cheating if...

[boytoynamedtroy]

Hypothetical question: Is it technically cheating if you have a girlfriend and you masturbate with a buddy? Does it depend on your sexual orientation (i.e. cheating if gay or bi, not cheating if straight)?

It's just something that crept into my curious adolescent mind, and I'm interested to know what your take is on this.

P.S. I'm not sure as to where this should be posted. So, moderators, please move this post where necessary. :)

[rioo]

If u already open talking about sexual thing with ur gf or partner. And she said u are exclusivly only for her then you are cheating. But if you never talk about it then u maybe not.

[Sailor Mars]

I believe it all depends on the individuals partner's opinion. Some may think of it as cheating while others do not.

[Edward_A]

If you have to ask "is it cheating if" it most likely is.

[Taryn98]

I tend to agree with the others. If your gf knows about it and doesn't care then it's not, but if you're hiding it, then it seems to be.

[Muddy Sneakers]

If you feel guilty or awkward about it then it's probably cheating, in that you are compromising yourself. And if your GF feels that way (even if you think she's "wrong") then it is definitely cheating, since both you and your partner have to agree on the rules of the relationship, it's not a unilateral thing. But if she doesn't care and you feel you can separate out stuff you do with your buddy then I guess it's OK. For me personally, I would think it's cheating.

[ska8er]

I don't consider it cheating especially when
she has a girl buddy as well. She doesn't tell
me but I know and I don't tell her and what she
doesn't know wont hurt her.

[nekid]

if you're just masturbating with a friend I don't think it's cheating.

[Kyle37]

Its all good fun

[LITTLEANGEL19]

I would say its NOT cheating, your just masturbating with a friend, but if you masturbate each other that may be a different issue, sexual orientation would not be relevant to your question .
x

[Anniebanannie]

Hypothetical question: Is it technically cheating if you have a girlfriend and you masturbate with a buddy? Does it depend on your sexual orientation (i.e. cheating if gay or bi, not cheating if straight)?

It's just something that crept into my curious adolescent mind, and I'm interested to know what your take is on this.

P.S. I'm not sure as to where this should be posted. So, moderators, please move this post where necessary. :)

Wait... is this a hypothetical question or a real question?

[Falcons_11]

if you're just masturbating with a friend I don't think it's cheating.

I would agree with Phil, if you're just masturbating with a friend, but not doing anything else. I wouldn't consider that as cheating on your gf. Masturbating with your friend in IMHO isn't really the same as having sex with him.

[ClaraWho]

Wait... is this a hypothetical question or a real question?

If you have to ask "is it cheating if" it most likely is.

If you are in a sexual context with another individual, be it kissing on the cheek to full on sex, and you aren't sharing that information with your partner - then it is cheating. You know it, otherwise you'd have no doubts and would have discussed it with your partner openly. Maybe she would be okay with it, but without her giving her permission PRIOR to any event, or to any change in circumstance, it is unfair and dishonest.

~ Clara

N.B. Here's another way of viewing it, would it be cheating if she masturbated with a male friend? Forget the gender as it isn't relevant, if you are being sexually stimulated by seeing someone else it is cheating, and if you Aren't turned on by it... why would you be doing it? O.o

[pjones]

If you are in a sexual context with another individual, be it kissing on the cheek to full on sex, and you aren't sharing that information with your partner - then it is cheating. You know it, otherwise you'd have no doubts and would have discussed it with your partner openly. Maybe she would be okay with it, but without her giving her permission PRIOR to any event, or to any change in circumstance, it is unfair and dishonest.

~ Clara

i think Clara is right, specifically not sharing information. honesty is important with your partner, that is how we learn what is acceptable and what isn't.

[Zachary G]

I dont see it as cheating because you are just doing it together, not doing it for each other. Does your gf know that you are bi and are you attracted to or ever done anything sexual with this friend? If its yes to any of those questions, then it could be considered cheating.

[everlong]

It depends on how comfortable your partner is with it. If you ask me, I'd consider it cheating.

[Elena_]

Hypothetical question: Is it technically cheating if you have a girlfriend and you masturbate with a buddy? Does it depend on your sexual orientation (i.e. cheating if gay or bi, not cheating if straight)?

It's just something that crept into my curious adolescent mind, and I'm interested to know what your take is on this.

P.S. I'm not sure as to where this should be posted. So, moderators, please move this post where necessary. :)

It is cheating, at least in my opinion.

[pjones]

me and my boyfriend have stopped masturbating with our other friends since he started living with me, so yeah, i would consider it cheating to a certain degree. it would not upset me if he did do it with a friend however though i would never do it with someone other than him.

[AutumnWinds]

If you are in a sexual context with another individual, be it kissing on the cheek to full on sex, and you aren't sharing that information with your partner - then it is cheating. You know it, otherwise you'd have no doubts and would have discussed it with your partner openly. Maybe she would be okay with it, but without her giving her permission PRIOR to any event, or to any change in circumstance, it is unfair and dishonest.

~ Clara

N.B. Here's another way of viewing it, would it be cheating if she masturbated with a male friend? Forget the gender as it isn't relevant, if you are being sexually stimulated by seeing someone else it is cheating, and if you Aren't turned on by it... why would you be doing it? O.o

clara really hit the nail on the head on this one.

[NZPerson]

me and my boyfriend have stopped masturbating with our other friends since he started living with me, so yeah, i would consider it cheating to a certain degree. it would not upset me if he did do it with a friend however though i would never do it with someone other than him.

16 and living together? Thats a big step soo cool to see people can find love r a serious relationship so young.

[chiisaiaoiryu]

Definition-wise, cheating is when you are actively seeing someone on the side while having a steady partner. Whether there's sex involved or not is completely irrelevant; it's cheating if you're seeing another person on the down-low.

However, there are those that are willing to stretch the definition to say that committing sexual acts with another - regardless if it's just jerking off or full-blown sex - is cheating. Sex has become synonymous - alike - with cheating, but that's not always going to be the case.

Nowadays with talk shows and gossip channels, we hear a lot about sex being involved with regards to cheating. It's my philosophy, though, that simply seeing someone while knowing you're in a solid relationship with another is already grounds enough to be considered a cheater.

[pjones]

16 and living together? Thats a big step soo cool to see people can find love r a serious relationship so young.

it's pretty awesome. both our parents are really supportive of us. he stays here 5 nights a week, the other 2 at his house

[NZPerson]

it's pretty awesome. both our parents are really supportive of us. he stays here 5 nights a week, the other 2 at his house

Awww

[boytoynamedtroy]

Wait... is this a hypothetical question or a real question?

Hypothetical, as it didn't really happen to me.

[benn_1198]

Its been said a few times already but I'll add my two cents worth. Whether or not it is cheating is perspective on both yourself and your partner. If your gf is happy for you too have a purely sexual relationship with someone else, and you are happy to maintain both your sexual relationship and the relationship with your girlfriend, then i guess its technically not cheating. However, if your gf wants you to be wholey involved with her, or if you feel guilt in pursuing a sexual relationship without her knowledge, then yes id determine that to be cheating.

i don't believe there's any undetermined middle ground between cheating and not cheating. You must fall in one of the categories. But as said, you might think its fine and your gf thinks its not. In this case you are not cheating by your perception but you are cheating by her perception. It varies person to person

[shy_indian_chick]

cheating is however BOTH of you have defined it in your relationship. if you've discussed it and she's ok with it, then I don't see why anyone else's opinion even matters. for the two of you, it's not cheating.

on the other hand, if you're keeping it from her altogether, it's definitely not ok. whether or not you want to technically call it "cheating" (because you aren't touching someone else) is irrelevant imo. it's obviously not ok from a moral standpoint - I say this because if you aren't telling her, I'm assuming it's because you're afraid that information will hurt her. also, you might want to think about the fact that a lie of omission is still a LIE.

[Emilyyy]

I think it's a tough one. Like if my boyfriend had masturbated with another girl then I would think of it as cheating but if it was just with his male buddies then I wouldn't be as bothered. It would depend on the situation really.

[sara___]

I tend to agree with the others. If your gf knows about it and doesn't care then it's not, but if you're hiding it, then it seems to be.

I feel the same way.

[Hufflepufflife]

It depends on the type of relationship. If it's an open one or not. It's a very case specific question

[katie3]

Cheating doesn't depend on your sexual orientation...

[army martin]

I would say depends on sexual orientation. If you're gay and do it with another guy then yes but if two straight guys watch porn together and jerk off then I'd say no.

[Bull]

IMO if you are in a committed relationship and you go out with someone else and have any kind of romantic or sexual relationship with them you are a cheat. Pure and simple you cheated on your relationship.

[scott2002]

Is it technically cheating if you have a girlfriend and you masturbate with a buddy? Does it depend on your sexual orientation (i.e. cheating if gay or bi, not cheating if straight)? :)

For me, I'll admit that I've enjoyed seeing and playing with other guys' dicks. But I have never been "sexually attracted" to a guy (like, wanting to hug and kiss and cuddle with a guy). So in this sense, I;d say it's not cheating.

Would I mind if my gf knew I was messing with dick AND messing with her at the same time? Yes, I'd try to keep it form her, but because I don't think she'd understand the difference and she'd just think I'm gay (which I know that I'm not).

(BTW, I don't do dick anymore. For me, that was a middle school thing only.)

[Olds01]

In my opinion, if you two just masturbate in each other's presence, then it isn't cheating, but if you are masturbating each other, or anything further, then I'd say it is cheating. However, you should consider discussing this with your girlfriend so you have standards with each other and aren't just using standards that internet strangers are giving you.

[MarkisMarkisMarkis]

If you had emotional feelings for your friend when you did it then I think it would be cheating.

If you were just messin around and jerkin off then even if you did did it to each other its not an emotional thing, Its like wrestling or something.

I'm not gay but I wish one of my friends would want to mess around.

[mattsmith48]

Hypothetical question: Is it technically cheating if you have a girlfriend and you masturbate with a buddy? Does it depend on your sexual orientation (i.e. cheating if gay or bi, not cheating if straight)?

It's just something that crept into my curious adolescent mind, and I'm interested to know what your take is on this.

P.S. I'm not sure as to where this should be posted. So, moderators, please move this post where necessary. :)

If there is no touching no, but you should talk to your girlfriend about it before you jerk off with your friend.

[Dmaxd123]

i could argue it either way.

i will say the no touching = good to go sounds ok on one hand... but on the other hand if it's ok to jerk off in front of another guy and not touch so it's not cheating, is it then ok to jerk off in front of a girl using the same logic?

all in all i think it's one of those case by case relationship by relationship things