I've completely lost my shit

[RJH98]

5 days ago my girlfriend broke up with me. I haven't dated anyone in 3 years (because I didn't feel like it) and I really loved this girl, but I am terrible at sharing how I feel in real life so she didn't see it, and that is why she broke up with me. The first day, saturday, I was doing fine. We broke up in a good way. She gave me a chance to speak my mind and we "agreed" to go our separate ways. Since we have a lot of mutual friends we're going to run into each other a lot so it's good that we separated on good terms.

The past few days have been worse and worse though. I miss her like crazy and I can't get her and the amazing times we had out of my head, especially when I am sleeping, all my dreams seem to be about her and I wake up disappointed and sad every morning. In order to stop thinking about her I started smoking pot with my best friend every other night.

I am forcing myself not to contact her for at least a month to give her some space and to give myself time to get over her. I am invited to her birthday on December 23rd and I plan on going because I want to see her and honestly try to get her back. It is probably going to be the first time I am going to be in any contact with her because she seems to have disappeared from every social media platform (which is probably for the best).

I am such a mess atm. If anybody has a way of turning back time, let me now. Advice on getting over someone is appreciated as well...

[jamie_n5]

Sorry you are going through this man. There is little consolation that we can give you. It is a major hurt that will take some time to get over. I will say that all the pot and booze or other drugs won't help and most likely will make things worse. Try to get busy with other friends and activities to get your mind off things. For me being a Christian I find prayer also soothing. I wish you the best.

[BlackParadePixie]

The feelings you are going through are very normal. Sometimes these feelings fluctuate and last for longer or shorter periods of time, it all depends on the relationship and lots of different factors. Although I am not against the use of marijuana...the fact that you admit you're using it to "escape" or "forget" about her...isn't a good thing, imo. You might think it works...until you start thinking about her while you're high...and then what? There's the possibility you could move on to abusing other, more dangerous things to avoid thinking about her.

I've found that the best way for me to take my mind off of a break up...is to just keep busy. Hang out with friends, take up a new hobby, keep occupied.

[brandon9]

Moving on is hard. I hate to say it but prepare for the long haul if you truly do love this girl - I love a girl I never even dated, tried 4 separate times to get her to, and its been months and I'm not even close to over her. That kind of pain you feel, its the worst in the world bro. Its okay to lose your shit over it. It would be strange if you didn't.

Its funny you mention turning back time though. I don't know if this will help, as I too apparently suck at communicating my thoughts and feelings, but, I'm afraid of time. How everything and everyone changes from what you know at first. I guess I'm sensitive to change. I can't handle it. I can't accept it. I want nothing more than to just reverse time, to go back and do so many things differently. I question the "what-ifs" all the time, and I wish that I could go back and make so many things right. And I wish hardest for that chance with Lily (the girl I mentioned above). I wish every day that I could go back in time and not do half the things I did. I constantly think if I had just done one thing differently, said a different word or voiced a different thought, that maybe things wouldn't be the way they are now.... I'm terrified of time because you can't reverse it. There is no fixing the past. Its dangerous to fixate on that notion of turning back time because it puts you in a fucked up mental state that's damn near impossible to get back out of. You'll doubt yourself forever if you think like I do.

Don't know if that helps, but hopefully it makes some degree of sense. If you need someone to talk to, let me know man. Might not be able to private message on here because I haven't met the requirements yet but if there's a will there's a way, can find some way to communicate.

[RJH98]

Thanks for your responses. I've been feeling better the past two days and I am staying away from alcohol and pot for a while.

[Kory123]

Thanks for your responses. I've been feeling better the past two days and I am staying away from alcohol and pot for a while.

STOPPPPP! STOOOOOOP!!!!!!!!!!!!! Now just stop, take a moment. . . . . . . Now relax . . . . . . . . . . Now take a DEEP breath............... relax :)

I may be a bit late to reply to this but i decided to comment to tell you this :

Happy early birthday you beautiful smol bean

anyway, maybe I can try atleast to say something. I'll pretend like I answered earlier :). Drugs don't help anything. It takes time, just right now, talk to someone trusted if you want, id give you a big hug and take you go karting personally. Just be around your friends and do things to remind keep your mind off the "person". I don't know what I'm saying but I hope I did my best. I'm only 14 XD, just wanted to wish you a more than happy birthday and atleast try to be a helpful little annoying kid :)

[RJH98]

STOPPPPP! STOOOOOOP!!!!!!!!!!!!! Now just stop, take a moment. . . . . . . Now relax . . . . . . . . . . Now take a DEEP breath............... relax :)

I may be a bit late to reply to this but i decided to comment to tell you this :

Happy early birthday you beautiful smol bean

anyway, maybe I can try atleast to say something. I'll pretend like I answered earlier :). Drugs don't help anything. It takes time, just right now, talk to someone trusted if you want, id give you a big hug and take you go karting personally. Just be around your friends and do things to remind keep your mind off the "person". I don't know what I'm saying but I hope I did my best. I'm only 14 XD, just wanted to wish you a more than happy birthday and atleast try to be a helpful little annoying kid :)

Thanks I guess. My birthday is in April, but it is always nice to see someone is thinking about your birthday, eventhough it is over 4 months away LOL. The past two weeks I've started feeiing normal again. I ran into my ex-girlfriend last week. She told me she regretted breaking up with me, which completely fucked with my head but told her I needed time for myself and said I'd message her around Christmas or something