Is this unattractive?

[berny22]

I'm 17y old. And I'm currently trying to get a girl. The girl I've been talking to recently can drink a lot and she smokes cigarettes. I have nothing against it. And that is not why I made this thread. I made this thread because I was wondering if she would find me unattractive because I don't drink or smoke. I never smoked one cigarette or drank one glass of beer in my life, literally. Would she think I'm a pussy and that it is unattractive, or would she like it? Does it depend on the girl. And what about my drinking "problem" in general? What would girls think about it?

[SammiB]

If that's what she likes to do and you're not into it, I wouldn't worry about whether she thinks you're a "pussy". You don't need to do all the same things for her to like and respect you. Don't expect her to change for you though...

[PlasmaHam]

Depends on the girl, but honestly, if someone judges manliness off how much beer you drink or how often you smoke, they have some serious problems. Honestly, I think you would be more attractive if you didn't smoke or drink than if you did. I'm not a girl so I'm not sure, but I know a lot of them like the good, respectful guy over the alcoholic druggie.

[Flapjack]

I highly doubt she would think that buddy, you doing your own thing would be much more impressive in my opinion. I think girls would be much more impressed when a guy has the balls to say no he doesn't want to smoke because of whatever reasons ya know?

Wish you luck with the girl :)

[lyhom]

honestly I don't think she'd care, I doubt it's that big of a deal to most people in general

[yeehaw]

It's not really much of a deal. If she does like you, she shouldn't have a problem with you not drinking and smoking. If she does, she's not right for you

[Nicole4All]

Not drinking or smoking is your CHOICE to make, and you should stick to who you are. Don't let peer pressure change what you believe in. I would find that character very attractive in a guy. And you'll find that there are girls who will feel exactly as you do and appreciate it. As for the particular girl you mentioned, your choice may not fit in well with her social preferences, but that's okay.......perhaps you're not the right fit for each other. Or perhaps she'll respect your decisions. In any case, there will be plenty of other girls who will like your style.

[jamie_n5]

I don't see why she would care. You might however. If you haven't been drinking and don't smoke it is rather unpleasant kissing someone who has been smoking and drinking. Especially the smoking part. Don't you dare start smoking to please anyone else either. It is an expensive filthy and unhealthy habit. I think you could do a lot better than her myself.

[PinkFloyd]

It's unattractive to those who are shallow and want others to do the same as them. I had a friend at one point who took his some of parents hard liquor (it was 120 proof Malt Whiskey) and wanted me to take shots with him. I was like 11 years old at the time and didn't want to fuck myself up, so I said no. He insisted and put a ton of pressure on me. I eventually gave in and drank some of it. I got really drunk and puked. The next day, I decided that he wasn't someone I wanted to hang out with anymore.

[Phosphene]

I don't drink or smoke, but if a guy I liked did I wouldn't not like him just for that. Sure, I would be concerned for his health if he did it excessively, but I wouldn't force him to change for me. If she wants you to change for her, you'd be better off finding someone else who likes you as you are.

[lliam]

Does it depend on the girl. And what about my drinking "problem" in general? What would girls think about it?


You'll find it out when she stops talking to you or tells you that she doesn't find abstainers attractive.

Until then, I would not worry about whether she finds me attractive or not.

But I certainly would think about it a bit, if she's in danger to become dependent on alcohol, smoking or such.

[Vilnius]

If she finds you unattractive for not drinking or smoking, it'd be better if you stay away from her, honestly.

That being said, don't pretend to be someone you're not. If you don't want to drink or smoke, just tell her that. Hopefully she'll be cool with it, which she most likely will.