My mom is overprotective

[Gabe_Is_Confused]

Hello. As you can probably see, I am new to this site, and this is my first post. And of my slew of problems, I found this one to be the biggest burden.

My mom has always been very protective during my childhood and my now teenage days. But, from a statistical stand point, some of her restrictions over me are unfair.

I am 13 years old, and if I were to ask if I could jog to the gas station 2 blocks away I'd probably get my head chewed off. I can go to a friend's house, but not on the same day I ask. My 2 sisters are exactly like my mother and are over 18, so I basically have 3 moms that will constantly enforce bogus rules that will eventually hinder my already awful social status to a point of no return. Miss a call from one of them while at a friends house? Oh boy, I'll be ripped apart like they're hyenas infected with rabies.

I wasn't allowed to go trick or treating with my friends without adult supervision until I was 12, (And my friends live in the suburbs) and I wasn't allowed to go to the theaters with my friends until this year. I find it absolutely ridiculous that in about 3 months I'll be able to get my driving permit and those freedoms were only given to me very recently.

It might have to do with my mom having a sexually abusive father while growing up. (The bastard is in jail) I've realized this and have tried having conversations with her about my freedoms. But she always pulls the "I do it because I love you" card. And that's completely understandable, but the mother bird has to let the baby bird fly sometime.

So, that's my issue. It's my biggest fear, that when I grow up and have a kid and I get asked, "Dad, what'd you do when you were my age?" my only answer will be, "Well, I played my PS4 all day."

[Valentine_]

She does it because she loves you and doesn't want anything to happen to you but it is to much. You should show her that she can believe you. For example if she lets you be out until 9 pm be home then, don't be late and maybe she will loosen up a little. Was she the same way with your sisters?

[Seth Green]

This does sound like a god awful existance and I am really sorry you have to deal with it, but try not to hold it against your mother, and keep in mind, you are still very young. My mother didn't loosen her grip on me until I was later into being 14.

[Phosphene]

She does it because she loves you and doesn't want anything to happen to you but it is to much. You should show her that she can believe you. For example if she lets you be out until 9 pm be home then, don't be late and maybe she will loosen up a little.

That's really good advice. I face the same problem of both my parents being overprotective. It won't happen overnight, but after proving you can be trusted and are responsible, she will hopefully start to allow you more freedom to make your own choices a little at a time.

[kevenity]

you know what they say: mother knows best. i mean you are 13 which to many is still considered really young. my mother was the same and when i look back, i actually appreciate some of the things that she imposed on me. are you the youngest child? if so, that can also be why. overprotective moms aren't all that bad. you could have had an uncaring and unloving mother. her father i think can contribute to this because of his lack of love and the traumatic experiences she has been through with him.
compromise with her to let you have more freedoms. this can mean letting you go out with friends but setting a curfew or text her when you're gone with friends to let her know you're alright. i know this sounds lame but maybe she will pull through and say yes.

[Just JT]

Dude it obvious your mom loves you sooo much and wants to make sure nothing ever happens to you. As much as I'm sure it sucks, what I'll say first is embrace that, as I'm sure there are many here who'd agree having the opposite is waaaay more problematic.

But what to do?
By the sounds of it I'd plan ahead. If you wana go for a jog, ask the day before. And build up on that, her securities of you being out there alone. Sounds like she is making progress by what you said. So think of how to approach her and get what you want without causing a big deal

[Gabe_Is_Confused]

Thanks guys. I guess my eagerness to do new things and make new memories before I become an adult can kinda make me forget I am still very young.

Oh yeah, and to answer that one question about my sisters: Yes, she was very strict with them. In fact, they may have gotten it WORSE than me.

[jamie_n5]

Yeah I hear you. I have strict parents too. I couldn't be on the internet by myself until I was almost 15. So I hear you loud and clear. Feel free to message me and talk if you want.

[Devinsoccer]

I feel bad for you. I have more freedoms, but I'm not allowed to have a sleepover with a girl. I'm thinking why not, we won't do anything. I'm adopted and my stepsister has had 2 babies and my mother doesn't want that to happen to me, so I'm stuck, never to have a gf, and my mother doesn't like me playing soccer.

[Just JT]

Yeah I hear you. I have strict parents too. I couldn't be on the internet by myself until I was almost 15. So I hear you loud and clear. Feel free to message me and talk if you want.


Me to!! I fought like a cat in a potatoe sack a year ago to even be allowed to be on VT, let alone have a kik account or yahoo or something lol!!